@StacJip , I’ve always told him that, as long as he’s happy and safe (that’s kind of become my mantra for him), I’LL be happy with whatever he does (with the exception of becoming a neo-Nazi or something of that ilk!). He knows that very well. He’s probably sick of hearing it from me! 
@bridgenail , yes. But he had a difficult transition when we moved from north to south, and from a very fuzzy, warm, nurturing school environment to a much more conservative one–and his first experiences of being bullied (he may still be making that connection when thinking about another school transition, although I’ve assured him that it will be a very different experience now). And he’s gone through some really rough times over the years, and I know that he still feels a strong connection to NYC and the surrounding area where we used to live. So I guess I was thinking that he’d be happy to get out of H.S. and get back to where he seemed to feel, in many ways, he still belonged (not to mention his saying how much he wants to be in an environment in which he can learn to play his music as well as he can without being “distracted” by much else). I just underestimated his connection to the friends he’s made here, etc. His analogy was, “It’s like giving a homeless person a new apartment. It’s a lot nicer than where he’s been, but he still ends up setting up a box to live in inside the apartment because it’s what he’s used to.” He’s said that he knows that the new school will be a better place for him, but that it might take some getting used to.
That line between being a “smother-mother” (especially for a single mother with an only son) and keeping TOO much of a distance can be tricky to negotiate. I’ve been trying to give him his space over the past few years, even when I’m tempted to do otherwise! And I have told him that he’s not being drop-kicked into the world–that he will ALWAYS have a home wherever I am (and also wherever his father is), and then if he ever needs me I will be there in a second.
Anyway, he seems to have gotten over (at least for now) the rough patch of anxiety he was going through. Yesterday he was talking about how many of his old and newer friends will be going to schools very close to where he’s going, and that seemed to make him happy.