<p>HIMom that too could be a boy thing. I too have a son who’s an avid reader, high verbal scores, who is a great communicator, thinker, well versed and well read in a wide array of subjects.</p>
<p>At all those back to school nights, where the class’s essays were tacked to the board or strewn around a table, we could always pick out S’s…it was the shortest. Good to-the-point content but no fluff, stated his case and was out of there. It’s really not so bad.</p>
<p>To the op: If you’re lucky, you’ll get a hs English teacher who’ll whip him into shape. S was fortunate to have same teacher for grades 9 and 11, tough marker but his goal was to turn these kids into writers. I’m grateful to the man for his efforts, and for the results.</p>
<p>Daughter was not fortunate to be in honors-AP English. If you think it can be bad in the higher level classes, the teaching of writing in general CP courses is non-existent, just where it can be needed the most. She wrote the way she talked. With some good college courses she’s become an acceptable writer.</p>
<p>btw I too agree the op’s child’s paragraph isn’t too bad esp for a first draft. I’ve read far worse.</p>