<p>Quantifier, I do appreciate and understand your perspective. I am completely comfortable with rejecting advice that doesn’t apply to my situation and am, despite the multitude of warnings, 100% confident my son would not initiate any parties, 90% positive his friends wouldn’t, and entirely unable to predict what his friends’ friends might do, so some supervision will be in place, but only for his protection not for any deficiency on his part. If something should happen in my absence to adversely affect his future (suspension from school, entanglement with the law…) I would feel responsible for having “abandoned” him. </p>
<p>Watched *Risky Business *last night. Pretty hilarious story about what happens to a good, decent, kind, responsible boy when his parents go out of town for a week. The funniest thing to me was that after everything that had happened, and given that he managed to get all his family’s belongings back, his mother notices a tiny crack in her crystal egg sculpture and tells her son “I’m VERY disappointed in you.” LOL, if she only knew.</p>
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<li>stories: A friend of mine (a teacher who did an excellent job raising her two sons) left her two boys alone at home for a week while they were in high school when the parents went to Mexico for vacation for a week. I was horrified but it worked out OK for them, and the sons did fine. No wild parties.</li>
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<p>My stepson stayed at our house alone for three days to watch our dogs while we attended my father’s funeral in another state. He was in a very irresponsible and rebellious stage at that time, but he did a good job and caused no trouble. I was grateful. </p>
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<li>stories: We live on a small cul-de-sac. Over the past 18 years two of the three families with teenage sons have had problem parties while the adults were gone just for a weekend. House trashed in one case; police called to break up party in other case.<br></li>
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<p>I wouldn’t leave my house overnight with my D here, even though she is 24 and in grad school. She has too many friends with a wild side.</p>
<p>We went, had a great time, we’re back, and our son did fine. No parties, minimal (and usual :rolleyes:) mess, and several more meals at Taco Bell than I would have preferred. Fair enough.</p>
<p>Well I was just about to weigh in only to find it out it’s all over with a good outcome! Was only going to say that just this past year we’ve had several weekends with out-of-town soccer tournaments for youngest and wondering how to split the weekend (DH has some coaching responsibilities with the club). One weekend I asked then 17-year-old middle son if I could go the whole weekend. “Mom–I’d be okay being alone for one night, but not for two.” I think most kids know what they’re comfortable with.</p>
<p>Congrats, schmoomcgoo,
I would have felt similarly comfortable leaving my 17.5 son home alone. Wait, we did just that this past summer when his Dad and I left for 5 days to go visit the 17.5 year old twin and bring him home from his summer program. Most of the time, parents really do know their own kids.</p>
<p>We are leaving tomorrow for Italy and Grandma is coming to stay with 16 and 18 year old sons. I am glad everything worked out for the OP and I too have great kids, but no way would I leave them alone.</p>
<p>Just to clarify, he was at a friend’s on the two weekends and only alone for the four weekdays (Presidents’ Day), during which he was very busy with school and EC’s. And the next door neighbor (my good friend) was keeping an eye on the house and checked in with him (with food :)) twice during the weekdays. And he was diligent about setting the alarm and locking doors. And he is a great kid. And we emailed or talked on the phone daily. And he was careful to only tell his closest friends.</p>
<p>My daughter is 19, two sons are almost 21 and one son is turning 23. I would not leave any one of them alone in the house at this age. The three older ones are great kids but I know there would be plenty of other people here if we left. My daughter would not have parties (most likely) but I would not feel good about leaving her with a nearby boyfriend that I do not particularily care for.</p>
<p>A woman in carpool the other day was telling me that she was leaving her then 16 yr. old and 13 yr old sons alone for the weekend. When I looked at her crosseyed she said, " my boys? the worst they would do is have cokes for breakfast!". When I mentionned this to my son who’s 16 and is in the eldest one’s class he said, “Mom, that’s the kid who’s having unprotected sex on a regular basis!”. Point taken.</p>
<p>Yup…so many parents are totally oblivious to what is really happening around them. And the wisest thing I have learned is that each of us can be just as oblivioius about our own kids. I have no reason to think that my kids aren’t the wonderful children they seem to be. And on a daily basis I do trust them and give them freedom and show positivity. However, I will not put them in a situation of totally letting down my guard when it comes to situations that I can somewhat control the outcome. Ie: I limit sleep overs; do not let them go to unsupervised parties (as much as I can control this); try to know whose car they are getting into or who is getting into ours; and I will not leave them unsupervised for overnights. And the funny thing is that before my daughter left for college we had a heart to heart about my parenting and she said that she (and her friends) respected me (and thought I was a cool parent!) and she told me she would probably do the same with her own children.</p>
<p>Uskool, that conver must have done your heart good! We do the same thing here, including no sleepovers two nights in a row. The kids come home like zombies, and I think its moochy on the other parents, too.</p>