I don’t think you’re crazy at all. I would suggest taking a hard look at LACs. I think you might find the atmosphere more supportive and congenial. One of the main reasons I chose Holy Cross was for its blend of great academics with a supportive and authentic (as you say, “real”) atmosphere. Nearby Haverford in PA (which seems to genuinely lean into its Quaker legacy and emphasis on community) could be worth checking out, or Bryn Mawr if a woman’s college is an option. On the Ivy level, did you ever look at Brown? I know Penn in particular has a reputation of being very pre-professional, and on that continuum I would put Brown at the other end. Good luck!