I think this is true. We’ve talked about this as an alumni group as more and more of the kids are getting rejected. A very active member’s daughter applied ED, was deferred, and then rejected in RD. She’s landed at a HYPS school so was a very qualified applicant. This woman’s younger son didn’t even bother applying and is now at another T20 where he was a third gen legacy on his dad’s side, and that school rolled out the red carpet. This woman was still volunteering but had backed off a lot and it definitely soured her. They also now donate exclusively to their son’s school.
My alma mater was not a good fit for our D, but I often wonder how we would have felt if she did love it and was rejected. I think it’s human to be upset if you love your school, have a well qualified kid, and have donated time and money for decades.