The Durable Power of Attorney form has an alternate agent in case primary agent is not available. You should make sure you are set up as the alternate agent. Then it is legal for you to sign docs with your own signature with “POA” behind your name. Some entities such as banks or financial firms need a copy of the Power of Attorney doc in their files
My sister, who is closer to where my Dad lives, is alternate agent for the Power of Attorney and the equally important Healthcare Power of Attorney document.
In addition to the Power of Attorney it really helps to have the primary care physician create a letter stating that Mom cannot handle her own financial affairs. This avoids having to go to court to legally get Mom deemed “incapacitated”. No agent needs to be defined in the doctor’s letter. It just goes hand in hand with the Power of attorney
My SIL was POA & healthcare POA for FIL, I was secondary. When she was traveling he needed to be moved and put on hospice, I had no issue signing everything including DNR. I would think the secondary could be able to sign if the primary is unwilling
@twoinanddone you may be confusing the role as POA and that if an executor who handles an estate ( after one is deceased). If your friend’s H is POA with authority to make both financial and medical decisions, he can tell the armchair quarterback relatives to pound sand.
My best friend from college was the younger of two brothers, but the designated executor for his parents’ estate, and there were also two younger sisters. My friend was like a brother to me and his parents like second parents, so when he passed away prematurely, his parents called me and asked me to be executor.
My first thought was that I didn’t want to get in the middle of that mess, but I knew the family dynamic was such that neither older brother nor eldest sister would be a good choice. Youngest sister was great, but that would have caused a lot of resentment. So I understood the parents’ dilemma, but older brother had also gone through a period of resentment toward me from the close bond he saw me develop with his father and I thought it would only dig up those feelings again.
I told the parents I’d only agree if he asked brother and sisters and they all agreed and was sure that was the end of that, so was shocked when each one of them called and told me they thought it was a great idea – including older brother. I really feel it was their way of keeping me tied to them in a meaningful way. That may just be wishful thinking, but it’s a nice thought and I’m hanging onto it. I also think my friend was looking down and smiling. He’d have loved it.
P.S. Sorry for going a little off topic, but reading the posts made me think about how POAs and executors are chosen and how it can cause problems if you really don’t think it out, including whether you’re getting yourself into a mess.
@coralbrook I am the primary health POA, which has been unbelievably handy. The reasoning was that since I’m the one who’s close and having to make on-the-spot decisions, it made sense. That document is on file with all of her doctors as well as the hospital. There have been no problems either with providers or in the family, up to and including signing my dad’s DNR when he was near death.
In the DPOA, the wording says something like BB is primary unless he’s unable or unwilling, in which case it passes to GB. If he’s unable or unwilling, it passes to me. Are you saying that since he’s unwilling to sign the tax forms, I could go to GB and ask him to either sign or pass the POA to me? Could I do that without informing BB that I’m doing it?
The wording on the Durable Power of ATtorney is ‘If the agent is unable to serve for any reason’. That could qualify as ‘unavailable’. In your case, signing of forms with an urgent deadline qualifies as ‘unable’ because of proximity reasons. However, I am not a lawyer. We have chosen to read it as ‘unavailable’ in a reasonable manner.
Agree with @coralbrook. And who is going to make a stink about you or good brother signing as power of attorney for your mother to file her taxes? Doubtful anyone is, as bad brother sounds lazy and could care less about you doing his work for him
I think telling you to forge mom’s signature (sorry, when I said you could, I didn’t realize she was incompetent) qualifies as “unable or unwilling.” GB should be able to sign in this situation.
Contact your local Elder Services office (usually town, city or state) and ask for their advice. They usually have someone available to answer questions without charge.
Actually, I suspect BB will make a stink if he finds that OP and GB are exercising POA. Only OP can decide when that is a battle worth fighting, but it’s nice to know it’s available.