Both me and my husband liked our jobs a lot. It definitely gave us purpose. But we were spending our lives living out of a suitcase, often working nights, always tired. It seems strange to actually go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, after 37 years. Life was just passing us by so quickly.
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I forgot to mention in my post that retirement has given me the opportunity to exercise as much as I want. I really enjoy it, and I have plenty of time to do it. No more getting up ridiculously early to work out. No more working through all the daylight hours, leaving no time to walk. It’s great!
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Unfortunately, sometimes it is the company’s situation, not an individual choice which leads to retirement. And past a certain age, it is very difficult to find a new job.
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I certainly understand that.
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There are some people who work until they die, or wait so long it’s difficult to do other things like travel.
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I think we all understand that some people are forced out and some people work longer than they should for various reasons. The point of this thread, though, is to discuss what retired life looks like to each of us regardless of how we got here. I just thought it was important to acknowledge that retirement isn’t a goal for everyone as those people will probably never open this thread to contribute.
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My retired life would look different if my DH would retire! 
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I left my job early in 2023 to help care for my Dad – my siblings had so much to handle and my job had careened into a useless pursuit. So I traded a paid job for an unpaid one. I never said “retired”.
In 2024, we grieved and then my mom took a turn, and then chose to move to AL; now we are working on selling the house we all grew up in.
So it hasn’t been quite what I expected, but I am learning to say “retired” or “not working”. I volunteer two mornings a week and really like that but I still feel so busy! In the summer we run a huge charity garden and not working has made it possible for me to really contribute. I like that part!
DH will retire in about 4 years, maybe three. He is working on that mindset. His own father retired at 80, and is absolutely miserable. I don’t want us to waste our last healthy decades on work!
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This!
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Oh yes it will🤣
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My husband and I were fortunate to retire young (51 and 56). We sold a business that gave us the financial freedom to do what we wanted. We were both widowed young and we married three years ago. We have spent the last few years exploring and planning what we might want in our second half and settled in on an adventure of sailing. We’ve bought a catamaran and spend half the year living aboard which we love. We plan to do it until it’s not fun. We still have a house in Colorado, and two of our four kids (+ our 2 grandkids) live within 20 minutes. Our younger two kids are on either coast (the recent college grad is working full time in NYC), and our college sophomore is at school in SoCal.
Our parents are both still healthy (in their early 80s), but we know those challenges lie ahead. We’re very intentional about maintaining relationship connections with our prior coworkers (as well as friends and family) while we’re out on the boat (we love Starlink), and when we’re home, we schedule lots of breakfasts and lunches with friends to stay connected.
Given how young we are, I can’t say we won’t ever go back to work, but we anticipate it looking different and being more passion-oriented. We’re still figuring out the best way to serve those around us and how best to do that given our split time between two locations, but some things that give us great joy include one day a week with our grandkids (age 5 and 2) when we’re in town, mentorship of people we worked with, and I’m loving using my college knowledge/interest by volunteering to help under-resourced kids applying to college (through ScholarMatch and other connections).
Eighteen months in, we’re definitely still figuring out the rhythm and I think what retirement looks like will constantly change, but we know we’re really fortunate to be able to take this time while we’re young and healthy enough to enjoy it
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I receive quite a few emails from the NYT related to health and wellness and this week the focus has been on resolutions. The writer stated that she had failed everytime she had set specific resolutions such as journaling, drinking certain amounts of water, exercise related and so on. She had decided that this time she resolved to not set herself up for failure. I thought how appropriate for retirement! I’ve been spending a lot of time feeling like a failure when I didn’t accomplish something everyday or didn’t have a purpose or goal for retirement. So what if the only thing I accomplished was preparing dinner?
For several months this fall I helped in our church office due to a medical emergency for a staffer and her unfortunate death. They needed help. I realized, though - it was just like work. The things I want to be involved with at church are not working in the office. I’ve refocused my attention to the areas that interest me.
It has been so long that I didn’t have to really think about anything but me, myself and I. Now is a good time to explore new activities - if I like them, continue. If I don’t, no harm no foul - just don’t sign up for them again!
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Actually he’ll find something else to do and will still be out of the house a lot!
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Last week I started a to-do list of sorts in my phone notes app - but because it’s any fun or interesting personal things I want to do/accomplish in my free time I’m calling it my “Ta-Da!” List.
I can be bad about remembering something to do when some free time presents itself. My phone is usually on/near me so I will just add things on the spot when I think of them. I met a friend for coffee yesterday and as a result of our usual “this and that” conversation I thought of two things to add to the list. This morning I saw that a local tea house I’ve followed but never been to posted that they are doing some renovations and will reopen in a month - a visit to the tea house now on my list!
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Similar to @abasket I just added a bunch of potential events to our shared calendar - performances and events including local colleges and community theaters - that are coded as optional (as opposed to the appointments etc). Hoping this will liven up the schedule!
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My husband early retired at the end of 2019 (at 60 due to a layoff). I still work a very flexible from home part-time job. He was worried about what comes next. The retirement freedom allowed us to sell our big house and downsize to an apartment near my daughter. This process kept us busy for a while.
Now we have settled into a routine. My husband loves to cook, so each day he plans our meal, buys it, prepares it, and we eat it. Our new location is near a park and we both walk everyday (something we never did before). I think we have a healthier lifestyle than we ever had before. If one of feels like taking a nap in the middle of the afternoon we do it! Since we moved to a new place, we have also enjoyed exploring the new state. We enjoy day trips to museums, small towns, etc.
We are also spending a different type of quality time with our daughter. She can come to us for dinner or a quick day adventure and we can do the same. A lot better then when a visit required a long drive or train ride, a hotel room, and her trying to entertain us for a full weekend.
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I think some people would wonder how I fill my days. But it works for me. I take a writing class and provide childcare for my toddler grandson one day a week and that anchors the week. I can help with the other grandchildren as needed because I’m flexible. But the absolute best thing for me has been no longer waking up dreading what might be in my inbox. It was an adjustment to have it be empty most mornings, but it is such a wonderful thing. I had a job that was all about engaging with people and I love my time alone now.
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I retired almost 2 years ag at age 60. My husband a few months later at age 61. Our youngest two graduated college the same year. We have modest pensions but have been able to scale our lives such that we can live on them, and will eventually have social security. Sometimes I’m jealous of the things others are doing in their retirement, especially travel, but then I realize I wouldn’t trade going back to work and having the money to travel for the relaxed self-directed lifestyle we have now. I spent my first year doing a lot of possessions downsizing and house projects that had been deferred for years. I always knew that I wouldn’t have trouble finding things to do in retirement and I haven’t. Like others have mentioned I keep a running list - old school on paper - of things I want to do including fun things, especially no-cost fun things. I also have consciously tried to do activities regularly in 4 categories that I found are important to me - intellectual, social, physical and creative. Some activities overlap. This may be too much planning for some but it’s how I operate! My only issue is similar to some others in that I have waves of guilt for not earning money because I’ve earned money since I was an early teenager and it’s always seemed to need to be justified why not, especially since I’m younger than many retirees.
Editing to add I actually have a 5th category - service. I like to volunteer for one-off things like work days, helping with an event, etc.
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Pet my cat… 
When I was newly retired, one of the things I enjoyed most was being able to leisurely drink my 2 lattes while I looked at my iPad and pet my cat, who would happily stay in my lap as long as I allowed her to. Unfortunately she’s now gone, and you’d think we torture our other cat - she’s not particularly friendly.
I retired in 2021 (almost 4 years now) at 59, and my husband retired in 2022 at 62. I worked up to 200 hours a year for a couple of years, and my husband still works up to 20-30%. BUT, he turns down work he doesn’t want to do, and it’s low stress/almost all work from home.
We try to take 5ish trips a year - some “big”/“high cost” and some less expensive/less “exciting” or whatever. We like to take active vacations, sometimes by ourselves, and sometimes as part of tour groups. We have a list of places within driving distance from us, and occasionally we make last minute decisions to do a trip, usually involving our bicycles (weather dependence).
We ride our bikes, usually at least twice a week when the weather is nice, and sometimes more. We average 30 miles or more for each ride.
I started and keep a pickleball group going (we average 3x a week playing) and my husband runs several times a week. We also walk together, or I walk with friends.
We have one day a week we try to reserve to do things with each other.
Except for that one day, on weekdays we usually eat dinner together, but don’t have to coordinate our schedules for earlier in the day.
On the weekends things vary depending on what’s going on in life.
We are in what we consider the “go go” years, and realize that as time goes by we won’t be able to be as active as we are now. We also have no grandkids yet.
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I always had a bit of an adjustment thing in my M - F daytime work routine for Sunday night transition as well (as a BSN first, I didn’t have that with shift work/weekends and varying days off) - as you say a dread or a bit of anxiety with going from weekend/fun to weekday working.
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