I was a substitute teacher for five years. It is very hard work. It can be rewarding, but it’s no picnic.
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One thing to remember is: you don’t HAVE to volunteer, take classes work part time, travel, etc. If those are things that you want to do, great! But your retirement doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s.
I live in an area known for being cold, so I hear you on winter. I don’t hate it, but I don’t love it either. I do travel some in the winter but I also embrace some things I like about the season and save some things (cleaning out/organizing), certain favorite shows, baking, puzzles, museums , etc. for the winter days when outside activities are not happening.
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I’ve already “reinvented” with this job twice - in fact I build it from the ground up so to speak working a 5 hour position years ago to “write grants to expand the program” to it being a full time job /program and then working for the National/state org. SLIGHT possibility I could do some consulting.
The needs of our team are changing - it is non profit and the non profit climate is TOUGH right now. Our team needs to shift to having someone in another part of the state and reside there - that will not be me! I’m not being kicked out but I know for the good of the program and $ that and the fact that I’m not going to stay forever and don’t want full time (which might open different doors in the org) …well, the right decision may be to exit slightly early. As I said, I was probably going to do it by spring and while I know that’s not that much different - mentally it is!
Also a personal feeling but it starts to feel weird when your co-worker is younger than your youngest kid. Lol.
Millions have retired and survived! I will too.
And @thumper1 i MIGHT consider doing a trip without my H but I’d probably not do it alone but like a group tour or something.
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I’m not retired yet but when one of my workers was born, I had already been working here for almost 10 years!
But I know it’s a huge transition, and all of a sudden your plans change and it’s comes sooner than “the plan,” it’s a lot to process. I know I’ll be very scared or maybe unsettled is the better word.
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And I say until you can’t wait to leave your work, until you know that what you’re running toward is something you’re super excited about, you’re not ready to jump. There should be no anxiety or hesitation before you cut those ties, especially if those ties can’t be easily re-spliced. If your current job does not provide you with a future, why not look for a different situation rather than retire? (And why be concerned about the age of your co-workers? I don’t get that.)
This does not sound like a recipe for happiness to me. If timing is truly the only issue, then you have no problem. If you are harboring concerns about what retirement will look like for you, then I think you still have some work to do before leaving your desk. There is no prize for retiring on someone else’s timetable. When retirement feels like an opportunity you can embrace rather than an empty space you are obligated to fill, you will know you are closer to ready. Those long years ahead need to be about much more than survival.
Really, it’s the people who aren’t on these retirement threads who might have the best advice for those hesitant about leaving the work force. They’re the ones who’ve figured out how to reinvent themselves in the work world to continue doing something they love. Retiring without knowing what that will look like for you or being insecure in your identity as a retiree is a precarious place to be.
You posted some time back:
What’s your plan if you hate it? What will you pivot to?
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I can very much relate to your sentiments @abasket
I too have a job that I love (at least 80%of the time) Most of my friends and my husband have been retired for years. For me, work is gratifying and part of my identity and as you say “worth”. And I have always been a person who thrives with juggling a busy schedule.
For me, work is somewhat physically demanding. So I know I will be retiring in the not too distant future. I have set myself a date of summer of 2028, in honor of the Olympics. 
And to give myself something to celebrate with.
In the meantime, I have been practicing having down time, which seems odd but is hard for me. Reading a book, doing a jigsaw puzzle, or just sitting out in nature. And I have been making a point of planning fun outings with my husband.
I have so many outside of work activities: I swim with a group of friends daily in the pool or ocean, I play in several community orchestras (with my husband) and I have 3 grown kids who like to spend time with me and will travel with me. Like yours, my husband does not love to travel.
Still, I know that retirement will be a big transition. But I’ve made many transitions in my life so I’m sure it will work out just fine!
Good luck to you!
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Yep, I did say that and it remains true.
What you post is a very black and white viewpoint (for me). It’s not as simple as that. I’m an emotional person and for sure, many emotions are involved - not just logistics.
Regardless, I’m not expecting an answer or solution here on CC. I felt this thread was a spot sort of like the “Say it” thread where I could get my feelings out in words.
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Your vibe sounds like me as well. 
I am considering some new things. And things that are not fair weather things which I have many and won’t do me any good in the winter!
I’m considering joining a gym. Taking more fun classes at a local art and nature center. That may widen my “friend” group. I’m exploring some volunteer opportunities but as has been said before here, there are lots of places that don’t return inquiries or simply are “full” for volunteers!
Mostly pity my H who may have to bear the wrath of my funkiness if I get their and cross that retirement line!
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We were a bit concerned as to what H would do when he retired after 45 years of work he mostly enjoyed. They begged him so he worked for an extra 6 months, and then said no more. He’s been able to find a ton of projects to do that HE chooses to do since he retired. Many of his friends are also retired and some of them would have “old futs” lunches periodically, which we would attend when we were available. He also gets together with some of his other friends. He’s taken up hand woodworking, reads books, watches some videos, dine out (often with me and sometimes with other friends), and we take a few trips together.
I’m still working part-time, running my nonprofit and being a consultant as desired. I also read a few books, watch a few videos, go out with H and sometimes other friends/family, go on a few trips.
More recently, we’ve been having quite a few medical appointments, which keep us quite busy as well. All in all, we wonder when we would have time to work.
Good luck in finding your path–I’m sure you will figure out what works best for you!
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It sounds like it’s the job that may affect the timing and that’s ok also. You want your nonprofit to provide those services that it does.
I do understand that.
There is always a fear of the unknown, we talk about it a lot on the parents helping parents thread. About giving up what is familiar for the unfamiliar. That’s very scary
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@abasket, I understand where you are coming from. Unlike you, I didn’t love my job but retired very abruptly due to my mother’s death and H’s multiple health issues. Navigating those issues took the better part of the past two years and now I’m thinking - what do I do now? You are smart to be thinking of what your next steps should be. Winter is hard no matter where you are - unless you are in a position to snowbird (which I don’t begrudge anyone).
I’ve explored a lot of things to fill time. None of them have really stuck, but that doesn’t mean I won’t stop trying. It’s difficult being an introvert.
I understand your concern for your coworkers and the organization you’ve done so much for, but really - you should not let that impact when you retire. If they need you to step away, I am sure they will let you know. Put that out of your mind and do what is best for you!
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DH was intending to retire in about 14 months, and now is feeling like he’s not prepared – and not to be political, but he’s also concerned that if he retires before the next presidential election and something disastrous happens, he’ll wish he still had a steady paycheck. So he’s been trying to think about what his next chapter would look like and enduring the inevitable changes at work. He’s a senior engineer who is slowly being sidelined in favor of younger engineers, which he knows intellectually is the right path but it’s hard to watch them mess stuff up and then be responsible for fixing their mistakes. I am unable to do much more than stay positive and upbeat about his ability to weather the storm. He’s having difficulty identifying anything to “do” with so much time, for the first time. He read Arthur Brooks’ From Strength to Strength but does anyone have other suggestions?
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Yep, introvert here - so that alone also makes new situations/social situations hard!
My “boss” is someone I can be very candid with - and have been. We are a small team in our state (4 people for the most part) and we have a different relationship than our 2 newer team members because I essentially mentored him when he came on a year-ish ago. We have already had “the talk” about I’m not staying forever a couple of times including this week.
I truly appreciate not only the support and understanding but also the gentle reminders that it WILL be an adjustment and I may just have to weather through (literally!) the transition.
@deb922 you really hit the nail on the head.
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@abasket - If you have a nearby indoor pickleball place, check to see if they do beginner sessions. Ours has a “Pickleball 101” class for free, where they provide instructor and paddle/balls. If you like it, then you could looks for local outdoor group classes in the spring. I took rec center classes in June 2024 and cannot believe how many nice people I’ve met. One gal from that first class has become a good friend.
Thanks for the suggestion. I’ve thought about pickleball at times because I do like physical activity. But 1. I have one shoulder that can be a little wonky - I don’t want to aggravate it and 2. I am SO NOT competitive! I prefer physical activity that is on my own or in a class (like Zumba or something) where there is no scorekeeping or competition going on.
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Good decision for you to be wary about pickleball. If your shoulder is already wonky, you don’t want to aggravate it. Also the most fun pb pals (in my world) are the ones who are not so competitive, mostly like to be moving and socializing. Some of them could move up to intermediate but chose to stick with our advanced beginner gang because it’s just more fun.
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My retirement was largely circumstantial – my career path ended abruptly, the replacement job was unsatisfying and poorly paid, and then my parents became quite ill. I woke up one day and thought “this is stupid, I can just quit”. Which is of course different than everyone with lifelong careers they have enjoyed.
But, I will say that you really need to give yourself a good 6 months to feel unmoored, uncertain, and try a bunch of things that just don’t work or don’t fit. That is very hard for people used to a schedule, but having watched lots of people retire and given my own experience, you have to treat it like grieving. And in a way, it is. That’s okay. You’ll get there.
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The first year I was retired, I really just puttered around my house, had lunch with friends…things like that. Oh…and visited our daughter in Africa while she was in the Peace Corps. The main reason I retired when I did was we WERE taking that three week trip, and the school would not have given me the time off. So…I retired.
About 9 months after I officially retired, I was offered a long term leave position. I had to think twice about it, but decided to do it, and it was great.
I became an election poll worker, and then moderator. And after that I picked up a volunteer gig.
I wasn’t in a hurry to fill my time!
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Another vote for at least trying pickleball. The shoulder I play with has been bad since the 80s, but I still play. I have never been good at any other sport, and I’m not (very) competitive either. I have found almost everyone I’ve ever played with has been pretty nice. It is a little social also, which is another benefit. One of the people I play with would tell you she comes more to be social than to play pickleball.
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Me too!
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