@parent365 I’m happy to give you some feedback that I hope will benefit @californiakt0 as well. My daughter was also not in the party/popular crowd in high school, nor did she have a serious boyfriend prior to college. So I too worried about her heading to ND with those students who would be more worldly/mature. She found her “people” by the end of first semester, after an initial friend group that didn’t work out. I think it’s very important to explain to kids that they might not necessarily stay friends with the first group they socialize with. Between my daughter’s friends from ND and her friends from home, at least half of them changed friend groups once they were there a while and found people with whom they had more in common.
The elaborate and well-planned Welcome Weekend is exceptional for pulling the students together and fostering dorm unity right from the start. Despite this, once reality set in, my daughter was very homesick through fall break. But by Thanksgiving she was completely fine. Again this is a fairly common experience at any school that pulls many students from so far away. But she was happy to return to ND from winter break and just yesterday said to me - I miss school, I miss my friends.
There are plenty of kids that don’t party, those that party a lot, and plenty in the middle of the spectrum. In the end, everyone finds their social group and gravitates to people that are like them. My daughter does go to parties on the weekend, her roommate does not, and they get along great. Unlike what is often the case in high school, there is no popular group and there’s no judgement on who parties and who doesn’t. People just do their “thing”.
As far as football goes, my daughter never paid any attention to it prior to attending ND, but she did go to most of the games. The student section is a very fun, bonding experience, even if you don’t know anything about the game. Football days on campus are electric with activities and tailgating, again very fun even if you have no interest in football. So many alums on campus really pumps up the school spirit.
My daughter had a great RA who I felt really kept her on their radar. She honestly doesn’t have the best rector, but I know there are great ones there, I’m sure that’s true of any college. What is also helpful is the First Year of Studies program, that all first year students are enrolled in. They have a first year advisor to help them with the adjustment as well as the required Moreau First Year experience class that meets once per week, which is all about acclimating to the school. I know my daughter met with her first year advisor many times and he was very accessible, both for making appointments and for walk-ins.
Lastly, I often offer this thread to people because I think it’s so well written. See post #5 from someone called Docmom, who I think eloquently explains the ND experience
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-notre-dame/7427-why-notre-dame-p1.html