Books—at first I wasn’t thrilled about pulling all the books off the shelves and then only putting back what I wanted as she suggests. My way was to pull out what I didn’t want and leave everything else in place. So much neater! But never made much of a dent.
But I decided after doing clothes her way with success I’d go for it and try it her way for books also.
I emptied three small bookcases and now down to two rather than 5. Books read but not loved—gone. Ones I bought but know in my heart I’ll never read—gone. Ones easily found in case I ever change my mind and want it—gone. It was actually fun doing books. No folding or trying on—just bags to put the rejects in. Yes I picked up each book—wasn’t feeling joy—more joy in donating.
I haven’t read the book or seen the show but have read a lot about the author and method. First MIL passed away and I helped DH go through her house. A year later I did a huge cull when we moved cross country. Then my mom passed away literally days (9 days) after we moved and I spent a lot of time in her condo going through her stuff. I got better and better at being able to let go of objects. My packing for the move went from least to most used, so it sort of was by category.
For six months before we moved, I would gather items for giveaway by the front door. Every few weeks (and at the end every few days) I would make a run to Goodwill and unload. Stacks of books went to the library for their book sales. DH did a couple of runs to the scrap metal buyer. And tons of stuff did have to go in the trash. One of my better days was realizing we would never need about a dozen glass/crystal bowls. So I got it down to about eight LOL.
I would have a lot fewer clothes if it weren’t for weight changes. Currently my closet covers about a 20 pound range so in any year maybe a third of the stuff doesn’t fit. I have moved within this range so it’s not unrealistic to keep it. Happily an entire wardrobe of plus sized clothes was given away before the move. I also have a number of winter items stored away just in case I have to go somewhere with actual winter weather. Arguably I could toss most of it but it gives me joy to know I don’t have to wear them. One of my problems is letting go of old stained clothes that are exactly right for wearing around the house.
We would have a lot less unnecessary stuff if it weren’t for DH. He has trouble letting old stuff go (part of the reason we’re still together 
. He’ll keep anything that might someday be useful, even if damaged. He brought back three SUV loads of stuff from his parents’ house when they put it on the market. All of which subsequently moved to San Diego with us. He underestimated how long it would take to go through stuffbefore our move and was still packing boxes in the study while the movers were loading the truck. He didn’t have time to go through it and discard. Fortunately we now have a large garage with tons of storage space. I don’t want to ask to get rid of anything because a year from now he’ll think of it and ask where it is. I don’t really mind; not a battle I want to fight.
Most of the new stuff we’ve bought is because of our lifestyle change. It gives me joy to buy lightweight winter clothes. It gives me joy to buy beach wear. It gives me joy to buy pool toys and deck cushions. It gives me joy to buy supplies for entertaining new friends. It gives me joy to buy a new juicer because now I only drink fresh squeezed orange juice (incidentally, DH insisted on keeping the old cracked juicer).
“I can donate to goodwill but then I hear that they are overwhelmed and ship the stuff overseas for scrap. Should I take to the consignment shop? If I donate, I feel like I have to figure out the value for tax purposes. Is my stuff good enough for consignment? It takes all this time and effort just to figure out where to get rid of the stuff I don’t want anymore.”
This is the kind of thinking that bogs people down. As a previous poster said, Goodwill’s mission is to really try to sell anything worth selling. Obsessing over whether they are doing this perfectly every time is not productive, That way madness lies.
Unless you have EXTREMELY valuable donations (tens of thousands of dollars) under the new tax code you very likely will be taking the standard deduction. No need to even think about the tax issues.
Take it to Goodwill. Be done. Get you home in order. Stop allowing this kind of stuff to interfere with the peace of a clean and tidy home.
Our local pet shelter takes blankets and towels even super ratty ones. A couple of towns have started collecting recyclable rags. I take stuff to Goodwill, I just don’t like going so things tend to pile up while I procrastinate. Our library makes $60,000 a year selling donated books. This year they took some of the ones that hadn’t sold and made a book Christmas tree from them.
I’m guilty of this too, but DH really is we can’t unload anything in case the kids want it. We’ve got way, way too much art work. His parents and my parents were both in the foreign service and both sets collected a lot of African and Asian art. My SIL looked into selling some of it, but that went no where. We’ve got the stuff I like on the walls, and the stuff I hate are hidden in the crawl spaces of the attic.
I was mesmerized by the first 5 eps. I swear I am going to make my husband watch the one with the newly retired Japanese couple. And the widow? Heartbreaking.
“A year from now he’ll think of it and ask where it is…”
“ I don’t know. “ is one response.
“Google it”
“Amazon is your friend”
“Try under the third pile of cr@p from the left”
I can’t believe the stuff I “saved for kids”. That ship has finally sailed! Done and over. They don’t need or want my old stuff any more than I do.
The old stuff that’s the best I’m still feeling the joy and won’t part with it.
Trying this method again. I started it when her book first came out and made a huge amount of progress with clothing although I didn’t get rid of all the stuff that didn’t spark joy. Kept being held back by the fear of needing it some day or guilt because it was a gift. However, it helped with a bunch of things and it was useful to become aware that I was keeping things I don’t really want. It might just take me a few more go rounds. I know her idea is you do it once and get it over with but I can’t. I will say that on my first attempt, I was surprised that so many things either sparked joy or at least positive feelings while so many others were laden with negative feelings, once you start checking with that in mind. Today I put together a whole bag full of things that I had kept in round one because they were useful for work. I thought I might wear them if I go back to work later, or for volunteering, but picking them up now: no joy. Not happy wearing them to my volunteer job even though they look/fit OK. Out they go. Relief.
@tx5athome reminded me about the other idea that helps me: would I miss this if it burned up in a fire? We lived in Oakland quite near many homes that burned there in 1991 and although I was relieved that we didn’t lose our home, I often wished we had lost all the contents and could start over! Nothing I wanted to say out loud then, since I genuinely felt sorry for people who had lost it all and were suffering, but really, for me, the few items I would have missed would have been given up easily as a trade for getting rid of everything else, including a lot of crap we still have, that moved with us from that house, that we still can’t get rid of. It’s an idea that helps me a lot with dealing with my own individual stuff but not so much with the things that my husband wants to keep.
“Guilt because it was a gift”
This is one reason why she says to thank things that go out the door. You acknowledge that it was a gift that gave you joy at receiving it but then also acknowledge that the item has served its purpose for you. It’s job for you is done. Let someone else enjoy it.
I do know this…if my H would jump on board and do this or ANY method to get rid of SO much of his stuff, I would drop to the floor like Marie and thank the floor boards we walk on!!!
I did clear out the bathroom drawers and the shelves in the linen closet (linens stayed, for now.) Put all the junk in a box, which made it as far as the bottom of the stairs.
Just realized I completely forget the closet drawers. ?!
@mathmom -
Have you ever seen the show “Strange Inheritance?” One episode featured a couple who had artwork from a relative. They hung some up and put what they didn’t like in the attic. When they decided to clear out, the picture they hated turned out to be a piece of art worth about $400,000! Good luck with your stuff.
I’m in - walk in closets now emptied and piled in bedroom- disgusting to see.
As someone posted, in another thread, Declaring war against those unmatched/old socks. I’m going to be “ruthless” ??? that will spark JoY
Places to donate linens, towels, sheets, blankets
Local veterinary office, happily accepted bags last year, when I did linen closets.
also,@mathmom mentioned Animal Centers
Can you imagine this clean out going on Nationwide because of Netflix show.!!! Good for consignment shops, small owned thrift stores, but seriously hope goodwill has enough storage for what is coming their way,
I am noticing more posters mentioning their husbands difficulty with letting go of stuff. Mine is exactly that way. His thought process is that it might be used again at sometime in the furture. Like those 30 to 35 yea4 old Natuonal geographics that have been in a plastic container in our storage room for going on 3 decades, or the tent bed we haven’t used but for once, 25 years ago.
I don’t understand this, that it doesn’t bug him. The garage is just full of stuff, at least organized nicely. And he acknowledges if we nice it’s going to be awful and we should start culling now, but he doesn’t want to.
Any men want to chime in why you just can’t part with it? It’s hard on us women, but we obviously are trying to do it.
@kiddie - That looks like another great organization for unwanted books! I would add though, that their bins are only located in New Jersey right now.
i have sacks and boxes and tons of stuff from the kids when they were little. Its so hard to give it all up. But it takes up so much room. Going to go through it and just save the “best of the best” today i guess.
I just went through a part of my closet with my “memory” clothes. (they don’t fit, but have such good memories associated to them). I GOT RID OF THEM! proud of my self. I have tubs of “memory clothes” from the kids too. I’ll tackle that next. Hundreds of t-shirts from all of their events. What will i do?
^I don’t have the capability or time, but I’ve seen people make quilts out of their kids’ old T-shirts. Way above my pay grade, but might work for some.
@bgbg4us , good for you! I have 2 boxes of baby clothes that I’ve actually saved for my kids to have, thinking they would enjoy it one day. I need to just keep two or three of my favorite for them. Chances are they’d end up having girls, or their wives won’t want them. I just keep having thus niggling thought that I’ll regret it. I’m sure that is what keeps us from doing it. I like the idea of having one box per kid with all their stuff. I don’t mind keeping one box. But I’m going to make them go through old things like trophies, etc.
Already mentioned it someplace but I took pictures of the T-shirt’s for a photo collage and discarded the shirts. The quilt thing was never going to happen.