<p>Well, since the deal is that they can be divorced at the end of the week it’s really just “speed marriage” rather than “speed dating.”</p>
<p>Also, they keep referring to this as a “social experiment.” Remember the Hawthorne Effect - people who know they are being studied tend to try to fulfill the expectations of the researchers. I think a lot of them will stay together because they want to prove the researchers right.
ETA: This show is like a train wreck - you just can’t look away.</p>
<p>“I always wondered “what do you do if you really don’t like them?””</p>
<p>From what I have heard of arranged marriages from Orthodox Jewish friends is that it is more like arranged dating at first. The couple agrees to be matched, but they do go on dates and if they are clearly incompatible, I hear they can break it off and see a new match. They don’t date in the way we think dating is- there isn’t physical contact, but they do meet and talk frankly about their goals and get to know who each other is. In some ways I wonder if they are more honest with each other than our modern couples who are not necessarily dating for marriage right away. </p>
<p>I don’t know about Indian culture, but with today’s modern technology, I assume couples can talk, skype, meet before the actual wedding. I’m sure in ancient times, many arranged couples had no say in the situation, but I can’t imagine that they could not speak up nowadays if it was going to be miserable. I also think families work at finding out as much about the future spouse as they can, so that the match is as compatible as possible, although I can imagine some dysfunctional families not having it work as well. Still, considering our current divorce rate, I’m not sure we are doing a whole lot better sometimes. </p>
<p>I knew three or four women in nursing school who went back home to arranged marriages. I couldn’t believe this was done in this day and age. These women told me that:</p>
<p>1)the agreements were made by people who knew and loved them and their well being was considered when their relatives were making these decisions;</p>
<p>2)they didn’t marry their husbands sight unseen; some had known their future husbands for years and had the right to veto the whole thing.</p>
<p>This is purely anecdotal and is clearly a small sample, so I don’t represent that it has any kind of global implications, but if this is at all the way arranged marriages are done in modern times, I don’t see much of a similarity between this kind of arranged marriage and what this show allegedly portrays.</p>
<p>I think we’d all be a lot better off if none of us watched these shows and they went off the air. That said, I did watch NY Housewives and Beverly HIlls Housewives for 3 seasons before it became old… so I’m not a whole lot better 
</p>
<p>And there ARE some great ‘reality shows’. Anyone watch NY Med? A must, I think, for all premeds !</p>
<p>I worked with a young lady with a PhD on organic chemistry who came here from India to do a postdoc. Her PhD advisor back in India “arranged” her marriage to one of his other grad students. The advisor thought they were a good match, called both sets of parents, and the two grad students got married. Both were too shy (nerdy?) to date. :)</p>
<p>One of my Ds has a friend whose parents’ marriage was an arranged one. They are a very nice couple with a very happy marriage, three great kids and four grandchildren. None of their kids’ marriage was arranged. </p>
<p>I do think that a lot of these shows are pretty silly but I admit to watching the Bachelor/Bachelorette shows with two of my Ds. We laugh at the show and ask ourselves why we watch but we enjoy the entertaining drama and the time together. We always know what the outcome will be because we read the spoiler website during the filming and before the show airs. It’s crazy, we know it, but it’s fun for us. </p>
<p>Katliamom, yes, I watch NY Med, which is interesting and I also loved Brooklyn DA and wish that would come back. My favorite reality show will always be Amazing Race.</p>