Totally agree with the paper trail…
OP- Send a text/email to mom “I actually don’t need the parent loan money since I already have enough to cover my tuition costs, and even a bit leftover for textbooks/school supplies, and groceries”. Here is a link to how the program works" enclose link that Cali provide. Whatever she does after that is up to her.
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I agree…but send an email, not a text. Texts are easy to lose once you change phones, etc. An email can more easily be saved.
"I actually don't need the parent loan money since I already have enough to cover my tuition costs, and even a bit leftover for textbooks/school supplies, and groceries". Here is a link to how the program works" enclose link that Cali provide. Whatever she does after that is up to her.
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I would tweak the wording just a bit…
“I don’t need the parent loan money since I already have enough to cover my tuition costs, and even a bit leftover for textbooks/school supplies, and groceries. As you’ve indicated, the Parent Plus loan money is for your own financial needs.”.
And, I’d try to get her to respond to the email…and keep that response as well.
I’ve worked in consumer credit for 35 years. The examples you are giving of paying your housekeeper or son are dealing with rational people who honestly forgot you paid in advance or reimbursed them. OP’s mother is never going to be rational about this or any credit matter.
OP, if your mother has the information from the school about applying for and taking the loans, it’s on her. I still don’t think she’ll get to borrow much as your COA is covered.
It could get messy in future years if OP does actually need PPL to cover COA…
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She doesn’t say that the school’s COA is covered. She’s saying that direct costs and a bit more are covered. That’s why there is a $6k offered Plus Loan. That’s the uncovered “official” COA part.
I agree that the mom may never not be rational, but it’s still a good idea for the DD to get that paper trail. Even irrational people can have rational moments when they’re calm (the really irrational parts come out when they’re upset/emotional). During a calm time, the girl could produce the paper trail reminding the mom about the reasons for the Plus.
Mom is a grown up and wants to manage her money this way. She could be paying off other debt, she could be using “other money” for college expenses or using this for a car or getting lipo, it doesn’t matter. Many take out these loans that have a a boat load of home equity that they don’t/can’t tap into or just cause they are better rates, it’s smart money management. Like was said, her money is her own swimming pool. It is her loan. Simple and not a problem. The daughter, and particularly her daughter’s friends need to mind their own business. Why is she discussing her parent’s finances with anyone?