<p>Very happy for you, congratulations. I come back to check up on you often, even though I don´t post that much (not very touchy feeling). Your famíly and friends´support will help you through this.</p>
<p>sunrise - This is such wonderful news. I am so happy for you! :)</p>
<p>Wonderful news! A bright spot in the sometimes bleak news we get. 
:)</p>
<p>Sunriseast - Cogratulations on your good news! I have been following your story and thought that I would share a story about one of my best friends. Your wonderful spirit and attitude reminds me of her.</p>
<p>Seven years ago she received a similar diagnosis with the same staging. She had two doctors, one we called Dr. Death and the other we called Dr. Hope. Dr. Death told her to get her things in order and there was probably not much they could do. Dr Hope said, I am not sure but let’s give you the latest and greatest intense chemo treatment its best shot.
She too did not have any nausea and took one day at a time. She had some dark moments but overall she remained hopeful, positive, and very resilient in spirit. Well, she turned out to be also a responder and she also said she could feel it working.</p>
<p>She has been in complete remission for more than five years. Dr. Death to this day claims it was a miracle, Dr. Hope believes that you should never give in or give up because you just never know.</p>
<p>Sunrise…you have been in my thoughts and prayers and I’m glad to hear the first round of treatment has come and gone. Lots of good wishes heading your way!!</p>
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<p>I know a guy who was diagnosed with MS 20 years ago. He has truly devoted the last 20 years to dying. After his diagnosis, he immediately stopped going to work, church, etc. Over the next few years he and his wife divorced and their son is estranged. Sure, I know it’s a hard road, but he has really spent two entire decades of his life doing nothing but getting worse…He would probably be in the same condition now no matter how he behaved, but he might have had some fun and a nice family life had he been hopeful, positive and resilient in spirit. </p>
<p>Sunriseast, you are a great example to us all!</p>
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<p>Actually, I think there is a very good chance that he would be doing much better if he had had a positive outlook on life. There is more and more research coming out that shows attitude actually has a real impact. Consider the whole issue of placebo effect - to me, that’s the clearest proof that mind does have something over body. So, if the medical community takes for granted the placebo effect so much so that no medical research will be considered valid without a double bind control for placebo effect, why wouldn’t they accept the effect of attitude on the prognosis?</p>
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<p>You are probably right. Sad thing is, he now relies totally on paid caregivers, so he is truly bedridden. I have an acquaintance whose husband lived with ALS for 10 years and, although I’m sure it was a lot of effort, she took him to high school football games, etc. until about the last year. For heaven’s sake, the majority of quadrapelegics don’t retire from life. If the guy I know hadn’t alientated just about everyone, he would have a much better quality of life. Of course, I haven’t been there. But I do know that it sounds really really boring sitting around for 20 years waiting for the end to come.</p>
<p>missypie,</p>
<p>the point you bring is a very relevant one.</p>
<p>When I came out of the surgery, I decided to become the most lovable patient they have seen both for the hospital staff and my friends and family members. </p>
<p>I felt this is a such a win-win strategy, I can’t possibly not implement it. It makes me feel better. It makes the staff feel better around me. More than anything else, it lessens the fear and anxiety of those who love me. Most of all, I felt that this is the least I can do for my husband and the kids</p>
<p>I couldn’t change the fact that I had cancer. I couldn’t dictate the course my body will take (though I felt that I could influence a great deal). However, one thing that I felt was absolutely under my control was how I deal with it and how I respond to it. When I got the diagnosis, I was losing control so fast that I had to hang on to one thing that I could absolutely control, and I was going to get the perfect score for doing one thing that was under my control well, Type A personality freak that I am!</p>
<p>Besides, should I lose (though I don’t that will happen, but you never know!), I want to be remembered as someone who tried her best to give back in a positive way even under the circumstance, rather than someone who drained the energy of all those around and left them bitter and desiccated. I want my husband, kids, and friends to have a good closure. I want them feel that I know they have done their absolute best and were profoundly appreciated by me. I want them to know that they have done a terrific job! Most importantly, I want my husband and kids to move forward in their life. I want to leave them a fertile valley not a scored earth.</p>
<p>It so happens what I need to do for this scheme of things is also what would make me happiest. Hence the win-win strategy. Can’t beat that. </p>
<p>(by the way, I read an article that posits that perhaps there is such a thing as collective consciousness after all. The neurons of people in close proximity can fire sympathetically, and resonate and amplify each other’s reaction. If this is the case, then being a lovable patient has a survival value. Those around me responding positively to my positive signals can amplify the effect even more, and create a virtuous cycle. All good stuff)</p>
<p>Sunriseeast,</p>
<p>Thank you for helping me be a better me.</p>
<p>DeniseC…well said.</p>
<p>you continue to be in my prayers
so happy to hear your good news</p>
<p>“Responder”- is the word of the day!
Sunriseeast- Following your posts,and appreciating your attitude and reflections.</p>
<p>And, 52 days until spring…</p>
<p>sunriseeast-congratulations on making it through another round! Your attitude continues to astound. You can turn those odds on their head!</p>
<p>sunriseeast – you’re amazing. Your family is blessed to have you.</p>
<p>I’ve been away from this board for awhile. I was active while my eldest was a senior in high school. That year was hard on us, as my husband, her father, spent much of that year going through chemo and then a bone marrow transplant. Just to say, kids can be so resilient, and strong. My hs senior managed to bloom that year, writing and filming an award winning documentary. And graduating with honors. Now, four years later, she is getting ready to graduate again, from college, with all the amazing experiences and close friends I could wish for her. Despite losing her father when she was a freshman away at college.</p>
<p>My youngest is now a junior in high school. An amazing, independent young woman, and her father would be so proud. The foundation he set in their lives still lives on.</p>
<p>Just to say, I can tell from your posts that you have set that same strong foundation in raising your kids, and it won’t hurt them for you to concentrate on you, and your fight this year. </p>
<p>And my thoughts are with you.</p>
<p>UCDAlum82, so nice to “see” you. And even nicer to hear how well your kids are doing.</p>
<p>sunrise, I’m just discovering this thread and sorry I didn’t do it earlier. Congratulations on your fantastic news! It is strange what we consider fantastic, though… your perspective changes very quickly.</p>
<p>I was diagnosed with breast cancer 15 months ago, with a daughter away at college and a junior in high school at home. I worried so much about them, but really, they adapted very well. It was harder on the older one, because she wasn’t home, and she’s a semi-professsional worrier by trade. I went through getting an initial diagnosis that was scary but really not bad, considering; then, after surgery and the pathology report, it turned out to be worse than we thought. So Worrier Daughter became convinced that the doctors were “lying” and couldn’t be trusted. But eventually I calmed her down. Younger D stayed more glued to me, especially through chemo, but by the time I was in radiation, the whole family was pretty much forgetting all about me and my problems!</p>
<p>One thing I realized: The natural self-absorption of kids this age is a blessing. They worried about me for a while, and when I didn’t keel over dead in front of them, they went back to their lives.</p>
<p>The best thing I got in the early days of my diagnosis was the following article from Stephen Jay Gould. You may well have read it, but if not, it is wise and incredibly helpful, and it will help you look at the statistics in a better way. Although you seem so incredibly positive, you probably don’t need the help!</p>
<p>Here’s the link: [CancerGuide:</a> The Median Isn’t the Message](<a href=“http://cancerguide.org/median_not_msg.html]CancerGuide:”>http://cancerguide.org/median_not_msg.html)</p>
<p>Hang in there with the chemo. It was a big fat barrel of no fun for me. But it’s working! I’m so happy for you.</p>
<p>And know that there will come a day when you don’t think about cancer every two to three minutes. I can go hours now and it never enters my mind. I thought that day would never come.</p>
<p>You sound like a vary strong person. Your kids will be fine because you are so strong.</p>
<p>A good friend of mine was given a very grim prognosis a while ago - diagnosed with stage III ovarian cancer - so long ago that I have in fact forgotten how long ago it has been
Probably more than 5 years. Of course she is still on the ball and undergoing treatment, but other than being hairless - she is healthy :)</p>
<p>So fight it with everything you have in you. You all will be OK.</p>
<p>Hooray for responding!</p>