<p>Garland,</p>
<p>Those who focus on the OP’s harsh wording are reminding me of an increasing trend among some in the boomer and later generations to feel no compunctions about having their lives/problems revolve around them without any consideration/meaningful responsibility for their children. </p>
<p>Saw this with some teen parents in marked contrast to ones who hold to my admittedly more traditionalist view in my childhood NYC neighborhood<em>. Moreover, I later saw a similar phenomenon</em> among upper-middle class parents whether it’s the upper-east sider set classmates at my HS or parents of college classmates. </p>
<p>The damage sustained by the kids who have parents who effectively neglect one of their key responsibilities of being the parent by modeling and holding themselves up to higher maturity standards commensurate with their age/relationship vis-a-vis their kids can be seriously debilitating and last for years/decades afterwards. </p>
<ul>
<li>Using their kids as emotional support/venting platforms for adult issues/experiences for which they’re ill-equipped to handle due to age and lack of life experiences. Forcing the child to be the “sane” or “reasonable” one in the family because the adult aged parents are acting worse than young children in the maturity department.<br></li>
</ul>
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<p>If the situation is as alleged by the OP, there’s an old saying applicable to his parents…especially the mom that “If the shoe fits…”</p>