<p>son flunked before he even got on the course… hahahah</p>
<p>no worries :)</p>
<p>Flunking a drivers test might very well be the norm rather than the exception. If she’s that concerned, practice the areas where she’s weak and get a pro to go through a dry run of the whole process.</p>
<p>Oh dear OP. Better during the driving test than out in your vehicle in a busy parking lot (just keep saying that). I’m not clear from your post, but yes…driving lessons. They are required in our state and then it’s graduated driving after the in car/on road lessons. Fifty hours with the parent, then some more classroom and then a certain amount of time with anyone over 18 and then a license that is restricted and a full adult unrestricted license at 18. Between 14 years and 9 months old (the first time you can take drivers lessons to 16 with a heavily restricted license and then to 18…the kids get alot of practice.) The absolutely best thing is to practice, practice and practice some more. Also I would not let her take the test again until you have been in a car with her and are sure she can navigate the driving and parking.</p>
<p>Oh one last thought, my kids’ drive instructor has a guarantee…if the kid fails the driving road test from the state (they give their own driving test to allow the kids to get a permit which is required by the state) he will take them out again until he’s confident they will pass. I haven’t had to “use” that guarantee but you might be able to find an instructor that has a similar guarantee. I don’t know about your state, but we pay for every road test that is taken. Not something I want to have to pay for over and over again.</p>
<p>Mine had license for 5 years, let them lapse, had to start over (permit and all), then did not pass the test… She now only comes to town a couple of times a year, so rescheduling was a pain, and had she not passed on the second try, her permit would have expired by the time she could do it again… Thankfully, it’s over.</p>
<p>Laws differ by state, but here in CA you need to take a certified class before you get the permit, which you can’t get before 15.5 years. Then you need 6 hours of behind the wheel instruction from a certified instructor and an additional 50 hours behind the wheel with an adult (over 21?) before you can take the driving test, which can’t be before you are 16. The first year you cannot drive others under 21, nor can you drive after 11pm. </p>
<p>However, if you are over 18 most those rules go away, and suddenly they expect people to be able to pass the test with no practice or instruction. It’s pretty weird.</p>
<p>My older daughter was one of very few that passed the first time, and I don’t know how. The vast majority of kids fail the first time here.</p>
<p>NJ’s test is easy in that you don’t have to drive under real world conditions, but it is just as easy to fail on smaller tasks like parallel parking, three point turns, or driving in reverse. Usually, you can fail one without failing the test, but certain things, like knocking over a cone while parallel parking, are an automatic failure.</p>
<p>As for the OP’s daughter? Failing is a pain, but it happens, and once you pass, no one cares how many tries it took you. I failed on my first attempt and so did a few friends, one of whom didn’t make it until the third try. I suggest getting some lessons not telling her friends about exactly when her second appointment is so that they’ll never have to know if she fails again. My best friend didn’t know that I had signed up to take it again until I showed him my license!</p>
<p>Mine flunked his first time. He’s the safest driver I’ve ever known, and was at the time he took his test.</p>
<p>The problem? When his permit expired between driving classes, I tried to teach him to parallel park so he could get his license and continue the classes. For the record, I suck at parallel parking and will do most anything to avoid it.</p>
<p>We did the trash cans thing and he practiced for hours, with me providing “expert” advice. Then he went and took the test and had to try to parallel park our very large SUV in a spot barely longer than it was, with only two gear shifts (reverse/forward) allowed. Failed miserably.</p>
<p>The solution? Renewed his permit and learned parallel parking from the instructor in his next scheduled behind-the-wheel class. Now he’s a pro at it (I, however, still suck :().</p>
<p>The point? Your daughter is so not alone. It happens frequently and she shouldn’t upset herself over it. Third-party driving lessons aren’t a sign of failure; they’re an investment in your kiddo’s future and they can be a great way to take the pressure off and avoid passing mom’s or dad’s bad habits on to kiddo.</p>
<p>A lot of companies now emphasize defensive driving habits and accident avoidance (google “safe driving school” to see what I mean). This is the kind of program I put geek_son through, and it did wonders for his skills and confidence. I so wish I’d had that kind of training myself, instead of a Jeep in the canefields with my dad! :o</p>
<p>My son failed twice. In California, at the time, he was required to have held a learner’s permit for at least 6 months prior to the test, and to have logged 50 hours of practice driving time with the parent. In order to get the learner’s permit, he needed to have spent 6 hours of behind-the-wheel training with a qualified driving instructor, as well as taking a written test on the rules of the road. </p>
<p>I thought part of the problem in my son’s case was the amount of time that intervened between the initial driving lessons and the test. Six months was a lot of time to develop some bad habits. Admittedly, my son was not a very good driver from the start – it scared the bejeezus out of me to sit by him for that instructional time, so I don’t think our interaction was very helpful or constructive. This probably led to me choosing to let him drive in situations I perceived as safer (open road), than the situations that scared me (heavy traffic, rain, etc.) – so despite hours of “practice”, he probably didn’t have the practice in the areas he needed them the most.</p>
<p>On top of that my son is dyslexic, and so there is an issue with verbal instructions and give and take. I could adjust to that – I also have problems remembering with “left” and “right”, so it is also more understandable for me when driving to say, “passenger side” and “driver side”. And I know that my son is going to take a little longer than average to process verbal instructions. If you say “turn left ahead” and the person has to work out in their brain what “left” is and then doesn’t really have a clue about what you mean by “ahead” (the intersection with the light? the alleyway? the driveway back into the DMV lot?) – then of course the person isn’t likely to do what was anticipated.</p>
<p>In our case, we waited a couple of months because of my son’s travel plans that summer (he was going overseas with a youth group) – and when he returned I hired his old driving instructor for another few hours of lessons. I’m sure that it is a regular thing for driving instructors to be rehired for test prep – in any case the instructor was quite sure my son would pass the test after working with him. </p>
<p>My son did in fact pass - an in fact at the end had a particular strong score on the driving test.</p>
<p>I’d note that my son told me years later that he never really was comfortable driving as a teen. In his early 20’s he got a job that required a lot of driving, behind the wheel in a variety of different rental vehicles, and he said it wasn’t until then that he started to feel confident in his abilities. </p>
<p>So the key is: more instruction & more time. I think its worth paying for professional driving instruction because often the parent-child dynamic makes things worse. (It really isn’t helpful to a new driver to have someone sitting beside them gnashing their teeth and gasping audibly)</p>
<p>Let’s see…</p>
<p>My daughter took drivers ed and got in to a car accident during one of the lessons (a car hit her in union square). Went back and forth saying she was going to get a license but never got one. Said she is going to get one this summer because she will most likely be leaving NYC. She will be taking a refresher course.</p>
<p>My nephew got a permit during winter break in hopes of getting a license when he turns 18 this mont. My sister was telling me about how well he drives when last week he was in the turning lane and did not turn. $225 fine and 2 points on a license that he does not even have yet.</p>
<p>Just another rite of passage, this too will pass. Your daughter will pass the road test and will probably be a great driver.</p>
<p>First two children passed the first time, I spent about 100 hours in the car with them and specifically went over “How to pass a test” check mirrors constantly, use blinkers to leave curb etc. Third child drove back and forth to school for a year with her Dad. Very good driver in real life situations. First test- failed parallel parking. Second test- tester nit-picked until she came up with enough points to fail her. My personal favorite was failing to accelerate fast enough. Third test hired someone through the Driver’s Ed company to go over how to pass a test and accompany her to the test site. Third time was a charm. First two have had a giggle over third one’s experience. </p>
<p>Number three was losing confidence after failure number two and so we felt we needed to boost her confidence. It worked for her. </p>
<p>She did however forget to turn the lights off after driving home from school the first time she drove on her own and drained the battery. #2 did the exact same thing. Getting your license in the winter has its’ pitfalls.</p>
<p>My 16 year old son passed his driving test last week. Here in Florida, you have to have your permit for full year before you can take the road test and I had to sign a form that says he had 50 hours of daylight driving practice and 10 hours of nighttime practice. His license is limited to between the hours of 6 am and 11 pm. At 17 he can drive until 1 am and at 18 he gets his FULL license. </p>
<p>I got him a total of 12 hours of driving lessons (with an licensed instructor in a car with dual brakes)in addition to having him drive me everywhere . He had the first 6 hours of lessons last year when he got his permit, then 4 hours of highway and parking practice over the christmas break then a final 2 hours the weekend before his scheduled road test. I am a a big believer in private lessons and lots of behind the wheel practice. That said, we live in Florida and we don’t have to parallel park on the road test here, who knows how he would have done trying to parallel park our family SUV!</p>
<p>Off topic but when I was in my twenties I was recruited for a job in the Detroit suburbs. They also imported three men from Manhattan (40-50 year olds). They never told the company they didn’t have driver’s licenses. It was hilarious…it was DETROIT and an advertising agency working on car accounts. People worship cars in the business in Detroit. They had to hire drivers for the guys to pick them up in the morning, bring them to the office, get to the client’s offices…they had to send them to driving school so they could lean to drive. These guys had lived in NYC or environs their entire lives and had never learned to drive. I’m not sure whether they expected there would be public transportation in Detroit or it just never crossed their minds. It made for good laughs around the water cooler for months. I always wondered if they “passed” the first time or not.</p>
<p>S1 failed the first time. It was awful. It was his 16th birthday which happens to be on Valentine’s Day. It was a Friday night and he was planning to pick up his gf and take her out to dinner as soon as he got back with his license…not. It should have been his best b-day but the DMV made it his worst.</p>
<p>It was raining, the DMV lady said S1 drove too slow making it dangerous for other cars on the road!</p>
<p>He went to a different DMV office the next week and passed with no prob.</p>
<p>I went to High School with someone who failed the driving test on the first try, if you want to call it that! This was over 30 years ago, and this person was all prepared to drive for the trooper giving the test. The problem was this individual drove into the wrong driveway at the DMV office-went into the exit driveway instead of the enter driveway. Well, trooper met this individual at the car and proceeded to direct them right back out to the exit driveway and further said not to return until they learned the difference between enter and exit! Believe me we all had a chuckle about that one as I recall! And I’ve not ever forgotten the incident, either. </p>
<p>Hope you share these stories with your daughter–she has to know that she is not in the minority when it comes to passing the driving test for licensure. Good Luck to her as she tries again!</p>
<p>my sister hit a car in the parking lot with an Illinois state trooper in the front seat grading her on the driving portion.<br>
Lots of tears and humiliation ensued till she sucked it up and tried again after more practice with our military fighter pilot father (0y! never easy to take instruction from him)</p>
<p>I am not a big believer in letting a new driver “drive” that much with peers…each kids is wired so differently and you have to be accurate about your kid. One of my kids is more testosterone fueled, is a geography wizard, always knows where he is but he wastes energy getting angry at other drivers which I worked hard to curb and correct that indulgence and distraction…before we let him out there, and the other is a daydreamer with only the vaguest “need to know basis” awareness of directions and rules…he gets lost and seemed immature as a driver.<br>
Other friends of my kids…well there were a few kids their exact ages that seemed all wired up right and able to drive very soon…that I would have given keys to early on.</p>
<p>We were strict…no friends in car for a year…and would negotiate exceptions with requests only. By the time several months of driving to the usual destinations passed sans friends, my sons were both in more of a groove and able to be more on their own and to enjoy more freedom.</p>
<p>My best friend in high school hit a parked police car during her test. That was a hullabaloo. I think she finally passed on the third try.</p>
<p>My first two kids passed on their first attempts but the youngest failed her first test because she stopped at a stop sign then slowly drove through the cross walk without noticing that a pedestrian had started to cross (hidden by another car) . She was deeply humiliated at the time but once she got her license, she forgot all about it.</p>
<p>A high school friend of mine pulled out of the DMV parking lot into the side of another car!</p>
<p>The tester simply directed her to pull back into the lot and park. You can imagine her result. :)</p>
<p>Well, I do believe I have the trump driving test failure story so far. I had been driving for 14 years, with licenses in three different states, and no accidents on my record. (And that included two winters of over an hour commute to grad school in Michigan.)</p>
<p>I moved to Washington State, went to get my drivers license in my new state, and had to make an appointment to take a driving test, which I FAILED. After 14 years of accident-free driving. Do you think I was mad? Very tiny nit-picky details caused the failure, such as parallel parking 14 inches away from the curb instead of 12 inches or less. They told me to go away and practice for two weeks and then come back to retake the driving test. I passed the second time.</p>
<p>My D took her driving test in a tiny town about two hours away because they had appointment available. The man she drove with was very nice and she passed with no problem. I took my drivers test at age 16 in our county seat because there was no parallel parking there. </p>
<p>OP, can your D go to a smaller town to retake the test?</p>
<p>I really think it comes down to practice, practice, practice in real driving conditions not just in the cemetary or in an empty mall parking lot. Drivers Ed is mandatory for those wanting a license under 18yo in MA. Parents also have to go for 4 hours of classroom instruction! Anyway, I was very surprised that probably 8 or 9 in the class of 20 parents said the only place they felt comfortable bringing their S or D to drive was the local cementary. The instructor told them the kids had to get out on the road, all roads in all kinds of traffic and weather conditions. He specifically mentioned to practice things like parallel parking, a lot. So many of us who live in the suburbs rarely parallel park. </p>
<p>My S has yet to take the test, but I know several of his cousins also failed the test the first (and sometimes subsequent times). Find out what will be tested and get your D out there doing it til she is comfortable. And as someone else mentioned no one has to know she failed unless she tells them.</p>