I’ve been hesitant to post this thinking that maybe our situation is unique, but I decided maybe it will shed another light on the matter. Please keep in mind that this is just one opinion, and I realize that some families just CAN’T work things out financially. I feel fortunate that we were able to. </p>
<p>Our oldest son applied ED to Stanford several years ago. We were naive, thinking that “full demonstrated need” meant just that. Unfortunately their definition of “need” was much different than ours. After being overjoyed at the acceptance in mid-December, I’ll never forget the devastation we felt on Christmas Eve Day when the Financial Aid estimate arrived…NOTHING, except Unsubsidized Stafford Loan. What a depressing day as we told our son “we just can’t do that”. Being a wonderfully sensitive, understanding kid, he said he understood and would do everything he could to find other options for funding. We said we would do our part to try and appeal. </p>
<p>We (like the original poster) also own property, which is in our opinion a part of our retirement investment. Additionally, we own a business in a very depressed area where our accounts receivable are unusually high - many debts that we will never collect. We arranged a conference call with financial aid, and included our accountant in the call. The property, in their opinion was treated like a liquid asset, as was the accounts receivable. At least that’s my understanding of it. At any rate, no change was made to our financial aid package. Our son applied for about 25 national scholarships, and didn’t receive any thing from them. He did receive several one time local scholarships. Seeing him try so hard to find away to finance this education was heartbreaking. We told him that we were able to finance the first year at Stanford, but we just didn’t know after that, as we had two other siblings to educate after him. He wanted to go to Stanford so bad that he proposed going for a year and if we couldn’t figure out a way to finance it after that, he would try to see if the door was still open to transfer to the school that was offering him substantial money to attend. </p>
<p>For the sake of trying to shorten this story, I will just say that he went the full four years and was able to graduate from Stanford. Here’s where the story turns positive. We always wondered if we were doing the right thing by investing so much in this top notch school. Could our kids get a good education and do just as well at a lower priced school? I think the answer is “maybe”. One thing that happened for our son was that by his sophomore year he was able to work in a research lab that paid quite well for something that he considered to be a major part of his education. These earnings really helped to lower the total cost of his education. More than that, however, it opened doors that we wonder if he would have walked through had he been in a different (ie: lower cost school). The connections he made in the research world at Stanford were so instrumental in getting him where he is today, which is in a FULLY PAID MD/PHD program. This was enormous as we wondered how we could possibly help him when we had two other children in college - we knew we couldn’t, and if it weren’t for this program he would have to take on enormous debt to finance his professional dream of being a medical clinician as well as a medical scientist. Along with tuition, fees, and health insurance etc, he also receives a living stipend and is actually getting paid enough to pay off undergraduate loans, and living quite comfortably while going to medical school. HE will complete his education debt free. </p>
<p>I realize this may not be the case with every student, but for us the “bang for the buck” of the Stanford experience really paid off. Now our younger son attends Duke, and already during his freshman year has connected with several wonderful research opportunities that we feel will not only stimulate him, but will help pave the way to his future in the area that he’s passionate about. We are convinced that it is worth the price to send our kids to a school that has the opportunities they’re looking for to make their dream a reality. Please, don’t get me wrong… I also beleive that students can do wonderful things at lower priced state schools etc. It’s all about motivation to find the opportunities and the connections that make things happen. I just wanted to give another slant to the “is it worth it” argument, and I can say withough a doubt, for us, it has been. We drive old cars, decided not to build a house on the lake, and figure we can make do for several more years. To us, it’s worth it.