<p>This is so crazy. Refusing to drink doesn’t make you seem “rigid or righteous,” because not drinking is not a big deal! And if you think it IS a big deal, I think that says more about the judger than it does the judgee.</p>
<p>I have yet to find a social/business situation that can’t be handled with wit, self-deprecation, and a little social grace.</p>
<p>^^^ I like you, abasket :)</p>
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<p>It would be nice if we never got judged in any setting for anything we choose to do. It does matter in the business world what you do, because the goal is not to be yourself, but to maximize profits, which may require certain expected behaviors. That’s reality.</p>
<p>It’s really no one’s business why someone isn’t drinking. Whether it’s because they don’t want to, don’t like alcohol, because they’re on meds, etc. </p>
<p>I can’t even believe we’re having this conversation lol </p>
<p>And suppose you DO have a medical situation (like I do) that precludes drinking. What, do I have to EXPLAIN my reason for not drinking just so I won’t seem “rigid or righteous”? Isn’t that just TMI?</p>
<p>“Excuse me, Mr BigShot, I’m not drinking tonight because alcohol and metformin don’t mix. Heaven forbid should you think I’m some kind of judgmental prude.”</p>
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Wow. If I am going to have a drink, which I do a few times a year, I will do it with people I love, on vacation or Thanksgiving. I am surely not doing it because someone, arguably someone with an issue, thinks I’m rigid or righteous if I don’t. </p>
<p>“It would be nice if we never got judged in any setting for anything we choose to do. It does matter in the business world what you do, because the goal is not to be yourself, but to maximize profits, which may require certain expected behaviors. That’s reality.”</p>
<p>I know that. I am not naive. I see people judge other people for all sorts of really foolish, superficial, completely irrelevant reasons, and many (most?) times it has nothing to do with profits (most people in an office will never see a client’s face) but with arbitrary social conventions.</p>
<p>It’s a business’s goal to maximize profits. For an individual, I think it’s a worthy goal to stay true to yourself, not mold youself into whatever sells best.</p>
<p>No one has to drink or explain anything. I am offering advice based upon my experience and observations. Feel free to ignore it, but why is it okay for some of you to call me names (crazy) for it? You can decide that I am wrong and what I say doesn’t actually exist, it doesn’t matter to me.</p>
<p>Wine appreciation in the business world is pretty common in my experience, but maybe not in yours. That is fine, so it doesn’t apply to you. If people in your business environments are enjoying and appreciating wine, it wouldn’t hurt to know a bit about it too. As they say, everything that exists is worth knowing about. People who are interested in everything are usually well thought of.</p>
<p>“People who are interested in everything are usually well thought of” - drugs too? Cigarettes and/or cigars? Sounds like a lot of peer pressure to me. Left that behind in high school…</p>
<p>I can’t imagine the business function where you would be looked down upon for abstaining. Sounds possibly like a fun business though. But it’s not something I’ve ever heard of. </p>
<p>Wine is one thing I just don’t like the taste of though. </p>
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<p>There was a time, and some companies, where hooking up while on a business trip was considered the norm. not doing so might have been regarded by some as being judgmental. I’m obviously not saying that drinking and adultery are the same, but how much should one do to “fit in” with the company culture?</p>
<p>Eta: I reread my post, and it could sound like I was disagreeing with you Vladenschlutte, no, I was agreeing. </p>
<p>I’m not going to eat the company cake just because everyone else is.</p>
<p>I’m not going to wear a business suit just because everyone else does. </p>
<p>And, surely, I’m not going to drink at a company function just because everyone else is. </p>
<p>DH and I don’t drink, and our family has called us “Amish”, pointedly not invited us to events, and make snippy comments to us all of the time about our not drinking. We NEVER voice disapproval to them about their drinking, and it gets really old to be singled out for it when it really isn’t their concern.</p>
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<p>Now if they said “I’ve quit drinking,” or “I don’t do that any more,” maybe so. How many people would just say, “I’ll have iced tea” rather than saying “No thank you, I haven’t had any alcohol in a month”? People who don’t drink would probably not even say “I don’t drink,” they would just order whatever nonalcoholic beverage they wanted and you would have no way of knowing why.</p>
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<p>This really is one you should just do though. I don’t understand what kind of principles you hold so dear that you’d refuse to dress appropriately for a business function. </p>
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<p>I was talking in regards to the survey, where people were asked specifically about whether they had drank in the past month/year. Not a guy who doesn’t order alcohol at a restaurant once.</p>
<p>^^^Okay, got it.</p>
<p>Here is an example of a corporate wine event planner and some of their clients. <a href=“http://www.karenmacneil.com/corporate-wine-events/”>http://www.karenmacneil.com/corporate-wine-events/</a></p>
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No, I do not. </p>
<p>Not dressing in a business suit does not mean I am dressed inappropriately. At the end of the day, what I wear is my decision. I decide based on what I am comfortable in and what is expected of me. If I don’t need to be in a suit, I’m not wearing a suit. </p>
<p>H & I don’t drink. In social situations, when offered, H will say, “I can’t, I’m driving” and I will just say “No thanks.” If pressed I say it gives me a headache. We just find that easier than saying flat out " we don’t drink" because somehow that usually turns into the topic, which gets old fast.</p>