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<p>@cptofthehouse, you have over 23K posts and I have not had you on my radar at all until now. I only read things here and in the theatre thread and then dabbled a bit in a few things specific to my non theatre son’s quest this year and that may be why. I find your posts in this thread daunting but also wonderfully refreshing in their honesty. Thanks for jumping in.</p>
<p>As one still in the zone of not knowing when to stop… and my daughter is 20 and still in school, I appreciate being mindful of the path ahead. There is certainly a balance. For example just a few hours ago east coast time, I got a call from theatre daughter who was sitting on a train platform waiting for a train back to the city after opening night and all of the hoopla that went with it. Besides all of the stuff to share about the opening, she was saying that she intended to hail a cab from Penn Station home instead of her normal routine of taking the subway which wouldn’t be running anyway by the time she got in and quote: the creepy factor of who I’d walk by at my normal 1 AM goes up exponentially by 3 AM.</p>
<p>So what did I do? Instead of saying, “good luck with that and be safe” if I was completely bad-ass mom and really stuck in the zone of tough love, I did what I just had to do to sleep tonight and said, “for heaven’s sake… get a cab and not only that I’ve just moved money into your debit card account to handle it tonight and for the rest of the run of your show.” </p>
<p>I’m a softie but one with a practical edge I think. I’m also a softie who is actually letting her daughter sit on a NJ transit platform after 1 AM all by herself and live in an un-air-conditioned room in NYC this summer. I am not sure how this actually translates to my style of parenting as she pushes 30 and nor would I ever judge about that. Ask me then. Meanwhile, my kid is still a student only half way through her BFA degree. I retain the right to adjust as needed and am completely respectful of the choices that people like @cptofthehouse and others that have boldly gone before us felt made sense in them moment as well as the bravery it takes down the line to decide you need to know when to say when. Point well taken and thanks for sharing.</p>