Neither NYU nor UCSD is mid-sized. They’re both large, and not meaningfully different in size.
The weather is indisputably better at UCSD.
There are good teachers and cool/motivated people at both.
I’m sure there are plenty of fun activities at both.
Neither offers any guarantee of security after graduation; you can equally work toward that at both.
Spring start is a social setback.
You seem to be looking for people to tell you that NYU is better.
Your parents have told you to choose what you prefer, so, I guess, choose what you prefer.
But if you go to UCSD, where will the extra $160K go?
You can say “don’t consider cost”… but in reality, the comparison should not be NYU vs. UCSD as if that $160K didn’t exist.
It should be NYU, vs. “UCSD+X” where X is whatever that money would be spent on. If you do that calculation and NYU still wins, enjoy and good luck!