OP- in the time in takes you to drive to your son’s college with his birth certificate and your passport, you could make a chart of every savings account, CD, brokerage account, stock, safe deposit box, life insurance policy, etc. that you and your husband own. In the time it takes you to argue with the bursar (who is not going to tell you ANYTHING without your son’s permission) you could look up your old IRA balance from your last job to see how much you have in retirement assets and who the beneficiary is (probably your husband, so you’re going to want to change that with your lawyers advice). And in the time it takes you to drive HOME from your son’s college, you could have interviewed three real estate brokers who can tell you what your house is worth if you sold it tomorrow, and how much you’d need to spend in repairs and cosmetic enhancements to get the biggest bang for your buck. And in the time it will take you to buy gas for the drive home, you could be finding your will to make sure your ex-husband is not your executor, and to make sure you have named a guardian for your 14 year old.
So would you rather do all the things I’ve outlined above with your day tomorrow, or waste the entire day having someone tell you “we will not show you your son’s bill without his permission”?
Move on.