You can’t work NOW because of something that happened to your son 13 years ago? Really? I mean really? Don’t you think your 14 year old, and your college student can take care of themselves at this point.
I’m sorry, but that is a VERY poor excuse for not working…now.
Your husband has clearly moved on. This has been going on for two years or so, and clearly, he is ready to be divorced. It’s really not his issue that you aren’t ready to divorce. All this is going to do is gobble up a lot of money for a couple of lawyers.
Is there divorce mediation in your state? Some folks find this a good way to part paths as there is a discussion and resolution of how assets will be divided and child and spousal support carried out. Look into this.
As noted by @Blossom, your soon to be former husband has moved on…and out. It’s time for you to believe this and do the same yourself.
For the record…this is NOT a financial aid question at all. Not one bit.