That’s me traveling with my best friend of 50 years, and she’s “only” 73 (she has mild dementia). She and I have traveled the world together and the past 3 or 4 trips have been really challenging for me. I did say we wouldn’t do another international trip together, but I’m still (currently) ok with going (some) places with her. 
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Another option that avoids lengthy international air travel is to take a look at Viking’s Great Lakes cruise: Great Lakes Collection - Itinerary - Toronto, Ontario to Duluth, Minnesota | Viking®
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ORD is the worst. Both operating into there and as a passenger. I’ve done my best to avoid both!
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That’s kind of you. It really was tiring for me. Not as much of a vacation!
Road Scholar (formerly Elderhostel) has river cruises, and they’re geared toward active seniors (but welcoming to their middle-aged traveling companions too).
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I had looked into them a bit and thought they’d be interesting for me and my husband. But don’t know about someone with dementia, as they are really into education, and I think that could be overwhelming for her. The trips look really appealing, though.
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That’s so considerate that you would take her to those places, but it sounds highly stressful for you!
When she and I travel now it’s to places we’ve been numerous times before, so no surprises. And it’s very low key - it’s not easy for sure.
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We just did Viking Rhine Getaway in late Sept, starting in Amsterdam and ending in Basel. We planned our own 2 nights prior in Amsterdam, lovely city! In your situation, I’d suggest just paying a bit more to do VIking pre-excursion nights.
To make the trip even more fun for both of you, maybe try to talk other family and friends into joining too? With a group there are lots of opportunities to mix/match for tours, time on the boat, self-touring.
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I’ll bet that was the trip of a lifetime!
As far as inviting other family members, I was thinking my sister and husband, nieces and my husband. We’ve discussed this before. But in the few hours since I’ve been thinking about this, I’ve come to the realization that this will never happen.
My mom has made weak excuses to avoid travel except to occasionally visit us for the last 40 years. Even if we talk her into it, I wonder if the realization that there’s probably not organic food onboard and oh no, I’m constipated will crash this down. My sister seems always excited to travel, but always, always cancels for any possible reason. My nieces, I can think of a litany of reasons why they’d cancel. My kids would never cancel, but I doubt they’d want to go.
Maybe I should just do this with my husband. The last time I planned a trip with my sister to Europe, she cancelled because she ran out of printer ink and was unable to print out her passport application. Three months prior. I don’t know what I was thinking.
Although it’s nice to have a group, we find it really nice to do as a couple.
We have met the most interesting people that we wouldn’t have had we traveled with a group. Truly interesting people who have traveled a ton and have such interesting lives.
By happenstance we sat with a group of ladies on this last cruise. All ladies and my husband, they called him the rooster in the hen house. Their next trip was the Nile. Their last trip was Eastern Europe. It was fun to listen to their stories.
I’m sorry that your mother won’t be more adventurous. Because if she could, I’m sure she would have a great time. As you know travel opens you up to another world that is very different than your day to day life. But I’m aware that some aren’t open to it.
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I’ll see what she says, but I realize that maybe I shouldn’t push too hard, especially since it’s likely the others would drop out.
Wow, the Nile! Avalon has a great river cruise there that I was looking into. Sounds really exotic!
The last few trips with my folks, we had to “help” pack, plus bring extra clothes as they didn’t dress right and were cold. We also had to hang onto all travel docs and ID. We also had to distract & redirect dad because he tended to get agitated and angry.
It was worthwhile but very tiring. We went to Yellowstone and Rapid City and upgraded all of us to economy plus. We also went to SF and enjoyed several performances of SF opera and met up with my dad’s SisIL (our aunt). Both folks had some dementia and had to be watched constantly.
For Yellowstone, dad got a bacterial infection and was having very low O2 rates. Fortunately I was eventually able to convince him to take some antibiotics I brought, which helped.
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That sounds like a lot of stress! Are you glad you did it, or wish that you hadn’t? It does not sound like it was a vacation for you!
We are glad we did it—Yellowstone was a national park they had never been to but always thought they wanted to go. My sis and her H and S came too.
Opera is another of mom’s loves. It was very special— my kids flew to be with us.
We expected it would be tiring and we were glad we checked their suitcases repeatedly so they didn’t unpack and repack. It all worked out pretty well and our nice aunt got us all amazing seats at SF opera, where she was long a patron.
What about @momofboiler1 's idea of a cruise from Seattle? Even if you’ve done it before, it could be pleasant and much easier, and a way to spend time with your mother.
And possibly save a European river cruise for you and your husband, as you mentioned.
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I think that is a great idea. Last year we jumped on a Holland America trip at the end of the season out of Seattle, and it was really cheap and fun. Like cheaper than staying home, actually! So easy to go out of our own port. I think my sister might even stick to going on this one too. We already discussed this before, my sister said absolutely (though will she cancel?) and my mom said, but is there organic food?
Thinking this is a better option for us all. And me and my husband can do the Europe thing.
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I think a river cruise could be quite lovely with your husband. (And I can give you planning help.) It was just the twosome with only your mother that I thought might be tough on you.
By the way, almost no young people on Viking cruises (and no kids - age 18 minimum). Evenings are quite mellow, could bore them. If there were grandparents that were lively without dementia it could work - I know a big family group that just did a Christmas Market cruise together.
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Yeah, thinking a couples thing would be better. Our kids are 28 and 33, without live entertainment, it might be too sedate for them. I like the aspect of the active option for AMA Waterways, but Viking seems quite appealing, also.
I think my friends used AMA. (They picked them because it had itinerary getting them all back to Christmas markets the couple had visited when stationed in Germany in 1970.) If I see them I’ll ask for feedback
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