<p>cobrat,</p>
<p>You are correct in saying that Asian immigrants are engaging in the same conduct as immigrants of other ethnicities for many generations before them. That doesn’t make living the experience any different for kids/parents from other groups who find themselves left out of the majority culture. It can be uncomfortable for some.</p>
<p>For example, you said it was silly to reject Manhattan College because it is “too Catholic.” I’m Catholic. I don’t think that it is in the least bit silly for a non-Catholic to decide not to apply because it’s “too Catholic.” (Georgetown is wholly different because it’s only about a quarter Catholic. However, if crucifixes in a classroom make you uncomfortable, I think that’s a perfectly valid reason not to apply. It doesn’t make you an anti-Catholic bigot.) </p>
<p>It’s also not bigotry to say that SOME Asian immigrant parents view kids of other races–and even some Asian-Americans with American values --a/k/a “bamboo” or “banana” Asians-- as bad influences on their kids and actively discourage friendships with them. I know because my D had Asian friends who had to fight the fact that their parents did their best to discourage their friendship…solely because of the color of my D’s skin/shape of her eyes. </p>
<p>It is also an issue at all of the NYC magnet schools that some of the kids from immigrant families persistently speak other languages–especially Mandarin Chinese–when they don’t want kids from other groups to understand them. Again, it’s a long time ago–though not as long ago as you attended Stuy–but there was an ugly incident involving playing cards. A lot of kids would play cards during lunch and the Chinese kids would have side conversations in Chinese–I honestly don’t know what dialect it was. The other kids thought they were cheating by telling each other the cards they held. When someone got up the nerve to finally say this, the Chinese kids got all hot and bothered by their “racism.” It wasn’t racism. The group would have reacted the same way if a few kids had side conversations in Creole (a language spoken by most of the few Haitians at my offspring’s school.) It’s also just plain rude. </p>
<p>The reaction of these kids was actually similar to that of at least one of the kids from the Jewish day school who were thrown off the plane discussed in another thread. When we do something which others disliked and they call us on it, it’s because they are discriminating against us. It can’t possibly be because the way we are behaving is unacceptable. I’m drawing the analogy to make the point that I don’t think this kind of behavior is unique to Asians. It definitely isn’t. </p>
<p>I’m Irish-Catholic. That doesn’t mean I’m an alcoholic or a I spend a lot of time in bars. However, it is simply the TRUTH that Americans of Irish heritage, in the AGGREGATE, drink more than other groups and are more likely to be alcoholics. Irish-Catholic college kids and other young Irish-Catholics are more likely to socialize in bars than kids from other backgrounds. Getting all hot and bothered when someone says that is counterproductive, IMO. Yes, assuming that EVERY “Mick” drinks too much is bigotry. Assuming that there is MORE LIKELY to be free flowing booze at an Irish Catholic wedding reception than at all American wedding receptions in the AGGREGATE is not. </p>
<p>It is also simply the truth that IN THE AGGREGATE Jewish families and families of many Asian ethnicities (though not all) stress academic achievement more than Americans in the aggregate (who in my opinion do not value it enough). For you to say </p>
<p>
is, to me, just plain silly. </p>
<p>I’m NOT assuming that EVERY Asian family stresses academic achievement, but saying that they stress it more in the AGGREGATE that other groups in the US is NOT bigotry.Just read the many posts FROM Asian kids on this board that talk about how much achievement means to their parents. OF COURSE, you can find Asian families for which that is not true…but in the AGGREGATE it is.</p>
<p>I am fully aware that not all Asian groups fit this stereotype. Neither Hmong nor Fillipino families do. But in the AGGREGATE immigrant Chinese families do. Saying that shouldn’t be “off putting.”</p>