<p>“Gee, how typical of the CC Parents Forum.
People debunking a book they haven’t even read.
Some things never change.”</p>
<p>So…have you read the book, annasdad?
Is it required reading for us before we comment on the topic or article?</p>
<p>As SlithyTove pointed out in post 40 above, the book hasn’t been published yet; it has a September publication date, per the publisher. Perhaps AD has read the book pre-publication, since his OP tells us “truer words.” Or perhaps the point of the thread is just business as usual … some things (posters) never change, indeed.</p>
<p>I seem to remember that we generated a whole lot of pages about the Tiger Mom book before it was published a year or so ago. :)</p>
<p>^^Or perhaps he is the writer, and is trying to generate more interest in the book by promoting it. Or…more likely, as you say, some things never change. Post an article about a book on what is definitely a controversial topic on this forum, and then chide people for commenting about it.</p>
<p>^^^oooh – that’s so beta.</p>
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<p>Is there any topic, cobrat, on which people ever just do whatever they want without being made aware of everyone’s “reactions”? Because every post of yours is about how someone did something and then how “others reacted” to it. And I have to tell you, I don’t believe it for a minute. Most people are too busy leading their own lives to spend a lot of time reacting to what their neighbor down the street or classmate are doing and how they are living their lives. Moreover, most normal, healthy adjusted people don’t particularly CARE what their neighbor or classmate thinks about their decisions – the proverbial tree falling in the forest. So why are all of your posts always about how everyone’s actions invariably engender responses from other people?</p>
<p>A quote from the article:
I suppose I’ll have to wait for publication, but I wonder where the words “coddled” and entitled" come from, and how the authors can prove such subjective characteristics. Surely there is no universally accepted definition of either; “coddled” particularly seems to me to be a relative concept. </p>
<p>The meaning I often so glean on discussion boards and IRL is “coddled: anyone whose parents give their children 1. more than mine gave me; or 2. more than I gave my children.”</p>
<p>[Coddle</a> - Definition and More from the Free Merriam-Webster Dictionary](<a href=“http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/coddle]Coddle”>Coddle Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster)</p>
<p>“Definition of CODDLE
1: to cook (as eggs) in liquid slowly and gently just below the boiling point”</p>
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<p>Feel free to believe what you want. If there’s a topic where I can contribute my own experiences or those of relatives, friends, neighbors, or acquaintances, I’m just as free to comment here as you are. What’s the deal?</p>
<p>Those were their experiences and my observations and it seems one commenter here concurs with those experiences/observations. Take it or leave it. </p>
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<p>So you’re ignoring the fact that there are controlling busybodies or peer pressure from peers, parents, school admins, and society exists and influences everyone greatly…especially high school and younger kids?</p>
<p>If your last sentence is true, you also have been ignoring how bullying works and has had a deleterious effect on kids and adolescents for generations…sometimes to the point of causing lifelong psychological traumas suffers are still undergoing several decades after the fact. I’ve known/met 60somethings+ folks who are still traumatized by such “overreactions” several decades after the fact. </p>
<p>Then again, don’t let me stop you from trying to maintain your own blinkered Potemkin village worldview. :D</p>
<p>cobrat - I think you should go back to read some of your posts, they are all the same. It’s always, “someone did XYZ, and people reacting ABC to it.” It is not “I witnessed this, and this is my reaction or this is how I felt.” You maybe saying the same thing, but you are always conveying about other people’s reaction. Most of us here are giving our own opinion and personal experience, or quoting what we have read, not other people’s reactions.</p>
<p>I am starting to flash back to “Lord of the Flies.” “Kill the beast!!” </p>
<p>I say let he whose posts are impeccant cast the first cyber stone. Everybody has a posting style, and all styles can be criticized, or, better yet, ignored when the occasion warrants.</p>
<p>On the other hand, at least no one is being coddled here, regardless of what we may, or may not have done with our offspring. Perhaps this forum can toughen up the spoiled youngsters.</p>
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<p>My thoughts exactly.</p>
<p>And lol. Yes, try to toughen the likes of me up ;)</p>
<p>I was talking to a coworker today about this. She is 10 years older than me (so 31). She thinks her generation is the most spoiled and that ours is just in some deep crap. She was in high school during the Clinton years when everyone was going on to major in whatever they wanted and everything was dandy (her words… I was a youngun at the time so I don’t remember). Then when they graduated and got jobs, the bottom fell out. It’s those JUST under her that she feels the worst for. She thinks we got the most raw end of the deal. </p>
<p>I can’t say whether she’s wrong or right yet.</p>
<p>“So you’re ignoring the fact that there are controlling busybodies or peer pressure from peers, parents, school admins, and society exists and influences everyone greatly…especially high school and younger kids?”</p>
<p>If your last sentence is true, you also have been ignoring how bullying works and has had a deleterious effect on kids and adolescents for generations."</p>
<p>Of course there is such a thing as bullying, and it’s terrible and needs to be addressed and stopped. But most people aren’t bullied. And, no, I dont believe most people have “controlling busybodies” in their lives to the extent that you do, with your inevitable my-relatives-would-have-looked-down-their-nose-at-people-who-do-x. As for peer pressure from school admins? Lol. Why would I have ever cared about what the admins in my kids’ hs (or my hs) thought about much of anything? They lived their life and we lived ours. </p>
<p>Your stories about classmates’ parents providing pressure or sneering at things also don’t ring true. It’s just not normal for most people to care that much about what unrelated, random kids do. People generally don’t expend energy that way, and if they do, you’re supposed to ignore them, not carefully note it down.</p>
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<p>Did you see my post # 28, in which I said
Exactly… Exactly.</p>
<p>And ditto frazzled1.</p>
<p>Well I may never get grand kids- so I premptively coddled my own!</p>
<p>I have yet to see a new generation that isn’t described as “the most coddled and spoiled.”</p>
<p>I think there’s some serious perception bias going on.</p>
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<p>Pretty sure this would make it an unusual place, then or now. Most college students, even today, go to community colleges or nearby state universities. The state flagship that students “go away” to is just one of many state universities, most of which have heavily commuter student populations. Yes, there are private universities, but most of those that students “go away” to are much smaller than state universities.</p>
<p>Note also that bachelor’s degree attainment among late 20s adults was only about 10% in the 1950s, rising to about 30% in the 1970s and leveling off, so a place where it is the norm to attain a bachelor’s degree is itself an unusual place.</p>
<p>Exactly.</p>
<p>If the norm in an area was to “go away to college” in the late 60s, early 70s, then that was either an affluent area or a collection of a certain group of people that placed an unusually high value on education and scrimped and saved to provide that experience for their kids.</p>
<p>Going away to college during that timeframe was not the norm.</p>
<p>Yesterday on NPR, I heard that only 18% of US college students are the go-away-live-at-the-dorm type of student. The vast nos. of people taking college classes are working adults, part-timers or commuters.</p>
<p>And to the “norm” – the large urban school district I attended, now boasts the country’s lowest HS grad rate ~22% of ninth graders receive a HS diploma in 4 years. Among these about 10% go onto 4 year colleges. Among these about half actually attain a degree in 4/5 years. Roughly about 1% of ninth graders in my nearby large urban school district will have a college degree in 8 or 9 years. </p>
<p>I wonder how Consolation would do to merge that reality with the one in his/her world growing up?</p>
<p>“I know a kid who is coddled and entitled”=“Kids today are coddled and entitled.”</p>