We let both kids drive their lists and the final picks. They understood the financial numbers but we never really set a limit, rather we said $X is doable and beyond that would have been a stretch.
As I’ve shared before, D1 threw everything for a loop when she decided to apply to 1 school. She applied EA and knew by 12/15. Her thinking was that if she got rejected, she had 2 weeks to come up with additional schools.