I was in exactly your shoes 30 years ago. I had to pass on acceptances to Hopkins and Duke as neither offered me financial aid. I attended a mid-tier local LAC that offered me substantial scholarship money and I lived at home and worked 30 hours a week. I was fairly pissed off and am still pretty bitter but did end up getting a decent education and successful career. I’m putting my energy into making sure my three kids can go to any college they can get in to. The system sucks; I’m sorry your parent is so selfish. Don’t let it define you though; just be sure you don’t become that parent later on!
I don’t see how the system could be any different. Why should a college give a parent with a 6-figure income a pass just because they don’t want to pay? No other business I can think of will give a kid a huge discount off the list price of their product because one parent is willing to pay and the other isn’t. However, there are colleges that don’t require the 2nd parent’s info. and others that offer excellent merit for stats. OP should see if any of those could be financial safeties.