<p>Just another thought. I know college costs a lot, but there are some savings that you have from NOT having kid in house eating,using shampoo, buying clothes, etc. that you might like to look at. The COA figures include all these things. So, even with high EFC, you can figure savings of $2500 from not having kid at home - even more if you paid for private school tuition, car insurance or extensive extracurriculars, plus kid works summer to make $2000+ contribution (paid directly to you since you don’t qualify for financial aid), and works 10 hours week during school year to pay for his/her own personal expenses. (So, total savings/contribution of $4500 or more to you.) Pick a school like Rice with slightly lower cost: $43,287 - hope for a school merit scholarship or outside scholarship or even NM scholarship to lower that amount. You may find college surprisingly affordable! 
(Lots of parents think their kid needs a car at college; usually not so. We don’t have to pay ANY car insurance for our kid who is away at college, since he does not have vehicle. He is covered in full when he is home visiting, also for no charge. That’s worth about an extra $2000, right there! :))</p>