More and more and more of the admissions business is now done through some kind of early round. At most of the top tier schools these days, half the seats get filled through some flavor of early (EA, REA, SCEA, ED). So it can be a tough long wait for the kid who gets denied or deferred by the reachy/dreamy ED/SCEA school.
First, the kid knows he’s probably not going to wind up at the preferred dreamy top 20 school. Second, the kid may not have been accepted anywhere else at this point (or anywhere else beyond a not so appealing super safety) given how the early restrictions work. Third, the kid now has to crank up a whole bunch of RD applications at the same time as other kids are celebrating being already done with the college rodeo. And fourth, the kid knows he is now playing the bad odds of the Powerball/RD round. And he knows that the SCEA miss at Princeton could easily have been an ED hit at Penn or Duke instead.
It will usually work out just fine for this kind of kid, but the ED/SCEA miss does make the process quite different and really drags it out. My kids stuck avoided ED/SCEA and made good use of EA/REA instead. That definitely made the process a lot smoother.
I’m all about EA and rolling to be honest. ED works for some but it’s really for the colleges and stresses out kids in December. I think Son #2 might have lost out on one acceptance that for all practical purposes he might have gotten by applying ED instead of RD, but within one year it is so far in the rear view mirror that I think parents think about it more than the kids and it was never “really” his first choice, it was more that brass ring thing but brass tarnishes easily so there is some parable somewhere in that all.
It’s the “2 hurdle” part that is hard for me, yes Kid1 admitted to EA school with decent merit, but waiting for the second hurdle of the complete financial package is hard. It tempers the excitement of getting in.
We haven’t been through this yet but I’m anticipating lots of stress. Not doing any ED’s for S19 since we would like to compare merit offers. Not that many schools have EA so I’m always surprised when kids have multiple offers for EA. We only have two schools on the list that are EA and they are not at the top of our list so I don’t even know that getting those in the bag will feel that great. We are also having him apply to a fairly high number of match schools for RD and we are hoping that at least two or three fall in his favor and he will have a chance to choose for himself come April.
He’s fighting us a little wanting to apply to some big reaches RD but not for great reasons. The pressure is starting already here junior year to get a “yes” to a prestigious place. Our S19 shared some of the schools he likes with his friends and they all said those schools aren’t that hard to get into and suggested other more selective schools to add to his list. Ugh. Kids are already bragging that their lists are better than his. No joke!
I hear our high school’s lunchroom is the worst with everyone knowing everyone’s business and kids feeling like they need to compete with each other. Many seniors this year did not get into their ED school and are now waiting.
It was a killer for S last yr. Top kid in his school but one of a small few that applied to several top schools out of state (most kids here are content with UF, FSU, UCF, USF, - he didn’t have any interest in them at all - although ultimately accepted into UF Honors). Was Deferred ED in December by top choice which meant waiting for the 10 EA / RDs until March. Was being asked every day at school “where are you going, where are you going”. Had to keep telling them, “don’t know yet”. First few EAs came in as declines (not surprised as they were highly selective). He was getting more and more anxious about the whole thing. Then he got one acceptance so he knew he was going to a good school out of state (which was a real driver for him). Then one by one the acceptances came in, some with merit aid, some without. Ultimately he got to choose from a very good list and is very happy but it was a VERY LONG wait from December to last week of March (I think he got 5 acceptances in 3 days that week).
I’m more stressed than my son, for sure. I don’t know if it’s because I never really went down this path? I went to CC then transferred to UF and graduated. There was no concern about “fit” in my world. Attending a CC first altered the college experience anyway. I don’t think it’s the same when college is split like that. Just my opinion.
We were seeking merit and choice, so applied to about a dozen schools.
Son has two defers - one super reach, one top 50 (which blew our minds), he has six accepts from safeties; two in state; three OOS with good to great merit; one OOS full ride scholarship nomination, but after applying decided not to try for the scholarship once he saw the essays.
We are waiting for 3 EA answers by Feb. 1, then 3 RD and the two defers in March.
Ultimately, we are really waiting for that defer from the super reach - he won’t discuss the other options until he hears, ugh!!
I think he is a “bloom where you’re planted” kid - so he will find his place.
So for you parents with deferrals, how much contact are you making with those schools? Just a letter? Another visit? In our case the admissions officer never met DD because she was a new hire. But not sure if they will meet with them now.
@jk201820 that advice will be good in April. But right now not too helpful. We encouraged DD to create a list with lots of matches not reaches. However the environment seems more competitive than even a year ago so whether those schools are still good isnt clear.
Both my daughters applied SCEA to top-end schools and neither got accepted. D1 was rejected outright and D2 was deferred and later rejected. On both occasions this made for a long, cold winter. The waiting was terrible. Each eventually got a safety acceptance in mid or late February, and both did very well in the RD rounds for high-end schools in March and early April.
So hang in there. The pain of waiting dissipates very quickly once the acceptances start to roll in. And unless you have badly misjudged in putting together the school list, they WILL roll in.
And the really delicious part is that once the acceptances have gone out the shoe immediately shifts to the other foot. Instead of you waiting, hoping, and saying just the right things to the schools to induce them to take you, the schools are now waiting, hoping, inviting you to parties, and saying very nice things to you to induce you to pick them over the other schools where you also got accepted. That part is great.
@Scipio thanks. I think a problem with the wait is knowing whether the list was good or not. It seems like such a mystery. We have had a couple of counselors advise us but who knows.
The one advantage to applying to too many schools is that you might get some good news early. That’s what happened for my daughter. She has one high match/low reach in hand with nice merit money and acceptances at a few matches and safeties that she’d be happy to attend.
So the real stress is over. We did have one weird twist, though. She didn’t get nearly as much money as we expected from one of her favorite safeties. It was a safety, but a really good fit, so that was kind of disappointing.
Same story here. A very disappointing merit offer from a close-by safety. Much higher ranked schools have offered as much or more…and unfortunately it has a very specific program she would love to take. Oh well.
My kids all heard in early April and we just tried to forget about it. It was a lot easier than waiting for a cancer test result, frankly, but the same techniques work. Exercise, Netflix, working hard, distraction.
My DD has been running on empty for months. But last night she joined us on th couch to watch the golden globes and i saw over her shoulder that she was looking at prom dresses! Made me happy to see her relaxing for a change!
@gemini2727, have you tried calling the school and asking for more merit? We haven’t done that yet because her focus shifted after the small award, but I might do that if it’s still in the running toward the end.
I hadn’t considered that, maybe I should? I guess it couldn’t hurt, because there’s no way she’s able to attend as it stands now, especially if she wants to dorm there!
