<p>Thank you all. He will get their decision in person at the meeting which is a half hour. So by 10AM Friday he will know, and we can move forward.</p>
<p>In the meantime, we are set to close on the sale of our home on the 14th and move by the 1st of February…where we move (rent) depends a little on whether he’s going to be part of the household this semester…</p>
<p>OHMomof2 - if they were planning to not accept it, they wouldn’t have him show up like that. They need to hear from the student - assess his sincerity, talk to him about strategies moving forward, etc. My dad was on the committee to reinstate students at the university where he taught. they want to give the kids a chance - they just need to make sure he’s got a chance at success, or else they’re just letting him waste time and money and put more dings on his record. I think the in person appearance is a good sign. ((hugs))</p>
<p>Hugs OHMom! I am going to take the meeting as a good sign.</p>
<p>Wow, OHMom, so much on your plate. Congrats on the sale of your house! At least you will know what’s going on in the next few days.</p>
<p>My guess is that Capital would not expect a student to come in from out of town if they were not going to let him stay…but they may impose some stiff stipulations as a condition for him remaining on campus, for example, requiring him to use</p>
<p>Even if they don’t, I would take a nice, leisurely walk around campus with him, and make sure he knows where the various centers for obtaining help are located…where is the writing center, study skills center, math tutoring center, etc., and I would motivate him to sign up now rather than later. </p>
<p>Sometimes students just don’t realize all the help that is available to them, don’t know how to access it, and are sometimes embarrassed to use it. Once they go, and see lots of other ordinary kids there, and get some real and constructive help, they get over the hump.</p>
<p>Another thing you might consider doing is to ask your son to show you some of the papers he turned in and got back, so that you can review the comments on the papers with him.</p>
<p>Sometimes the kids don’t realize that the comments on one paper often can be applied to a whole lot of other assignments and even to how to do better writing on exams.</p>
<p>As you can bet, I thought of General Mom too! I sent that article to my neighbor…</p>
<p>they left for sunny Florida the day Neighborson got back from school.</p>
<p>@OH Mom - based on no knowledge at all I also think it is a good sign. Fingers and toes crossed.</p>
<p>Delighted to hear back from old timers - if others are out there lurking please post an update!</p>
<p>Neither D1 nor D2 have grades back yet on all of their courses. No particular worries - but it would be nice to know.</p>
<p>D2 has spent the last few days compiling packages for various summer stock auditions. Definitely had flashbacks to arts supplements and college apps last year. We also had some family friends visit with a HS senior finishing the application process. We made a vow at the beginning of the visit to only talk about schools each of the kids were currently attending. She looked so relieved. I do not miss that part of the process.</p>
<p>Also woke up this morning to a friend of D2’s sleeping on the family room couch. That is the good flashback - a house filled with teenagers!</p>
<p>D2 wrapped up 2012 by getting her wallet stolen while shopping down at soho. We had to go to a police precinct to file a report. She is going to have to get her driver’s license, student id, keys, credit cards…replaced. On top of that, she had all of her Christmas money in her wallet, and the wallet was an expensive gift from her sister.</p>
<p>Darn oldfort, that’s awful :(</p>
<p>boysx3, we have already talked some and if he is allowed to return this semester, there will be more. It’s clear to me now that he struggled, not only academically. The second half of the semester he missed some classes and then let it snowball. </p>
<p>He’s going to need to take regular advantage of both academic support and counseling to get my OK to go back.</p>
<p>OHMom, hoping things go well for your son. Oldfort, that’s so upsetting!</p>
<p>And giterdone…I’m still all torn up about whether or not it’s going to prove to be a sensible move from the ACC to the Big 10, but I appreciate your kind welcome! ;)</p>
<p>OHmom - I’m hoping the in-person request is a positive sign and will be the start to a much more dedicated semester for your guy.</p>
<p>Oldfort - what a bummer of a way to end 2012!</p>
<p>We have all three of our boys (plus a fiancee and my mom) here at home as of yesterday. Last night I kept thinking of the song, “Time in a Bottle.” We had a huge amount of fun playing games, reminiscing, and plotting hopeful thoughts/plans for the future.</p>
<p>OldFort, what a bummer for your D! OH Mom, I too think it is a good sign that they want to see him in person.<br>
Our S leaves today to go back to our hometown to stay with friends for a few days before starting up again next Monday. He did great first semester both grade-wise and socially. He had early finals so he has been here almost three weeks–this is a horrible thing to say but I am a little relieved that he is heading back early. He spent almost all his time here sleeping past noon and then “relaxing” by playing online games that require cooperative time commitments (including during dinner, which is sacred family time for me) and he complained when anyone asked him to do anything else unless he was at a good stopping point. I was even giving him “one hour” then “half-hour” then “fifteen minute” warnings prior to dinner and even that did not work. We did have a few nice family times and I am sure he would say the visit went great. He spent some time with his little sisters, so that is good at least. I know he worked hard last semester, so I did not want to ruin his trip home and I let his behavior go. He never fouled the nest last summer, but that is kinda how this vacation felt…maybe a shorter break would have been better!</p>
<p>Oh, oldfort - so sorry for your D! I hate when things like that happen. :(</p>
<p>Oldfort, I feel so badly for your daughter. </p>
<p>My DIL’s wallet was lost/stolen last fall…what a pain. It really freaked her out.</p>
<p>She now uses only purses that have a double closure (like a snapping flap over a zipper) and have an interior zipping compartment for her to keep her wallet, and she keeps her license in one small wallet with some cash, and her credit cards in a separate small wallet with a bit more cash…Actually, she generally now takes only one credit card and her debit card with her unless she needs a specific card for where she is going.</p>
<p>I should probably take a lesson from her.</p>
<p>As far as our kids keeping themselves occupied when they get home from school for a several week break…it’s hard.</p>
<p>They really don’t have much structure at home any more, because the routine that defined their lives when they were in high school doesn’t apply any more. No more school from 8-3, followed by ECs, sports, rehearsals, music lessons…followed by however many hours of homework. </p>
<p>Their day planner really is empty for a few weeks, unless they are lucky enough to have a job.</p>
<p>They miss the 24-hour hubbub that is their new college life…always someone around to do something with, no one telling them what they should be doing…no one else’s rules.</p>
<p>At the same time (at least this was true with my kids-YMMV) they really needed to decompress from the all-on/all-the-time of college life. Having to be friendly, upbeat, social all the time is more stressful than you realize, and it’s something a lot of kids can’t put a specific finger on. </p>
<p>I noticed that when my kids came home, after the first day or so of loving family, they would sort of withdraw into their own solitary bubble for a while. Play video games for hours (no human contact necessary). Sleep really long hours. TV watching marathons. All the things they can’t do at school.</p>
<p>Now they are in a safe place to indulge themselves, and it would drive me crazy. I had a long list of how I thought they could better spend their time (with me, helping me…)</p>
<p>And then it hits them…when they are ready to find something to do and someone to do it with, they suddenly realize that their life has diverged from what it used to be, and that so have the lives of all of their old friends.</p>
<p>My D’s friends are all going back to school a week before she does. I think she is going to make us all crazy that week because she will be bored out of her mind! </p>
<p>Our biggest issue is the sharing of the car. S got his license the week before D left. S was sick over Thanksgiving so he wasn’t going anywhere. Now though, both are wanting to go do their own thing and the car has been an issue. This will be more painful next week when S is back to high school and D is home with no friends around. I’m not even sure S knows which bus he is on anymore because he’s been driving to school all year. I know D isn’t going to want to be home with no car all day while S is at school and I’m at work. </p>
<p>I’m looking for a short term solution for this summer. D will never have a car at Barnard for obvious reasons. They may both have jobs. I need another car for 3 months out of the year. I have no idea what to do about that. I hate to buy something that will sit 9 months out of the year. I’m hoping D can find an internship in downtown Detroit so we can carpool. <em>fingers crossed</em></p>
<p>You put it really well, boysx3.
I’ve tried to help my H to lighten a little on our S. DS has spent some time alone in his room each day, either listening to music or playing on computer, but he is working 5 days a week - and getting up at 6:30 AM since he starts at 7:30! Then he has to continue his work-out regimen for boxing - it’s a 6 day-a-week cycle of training that needs to be continued even while he’s home, so that he’s ready to go in the ring when he gets back to school. After he gets home and showers, I don’t mind if he takes some time to himself. He’s been good about spending some time with his younger sister, continuing to practice piano & flute, visiting relatives and being considerate about when he wants to borrow the car to see HS friends or GF.
Overall, it’s been much smoother than I had anticipated. We still have another week and a half, so we’ll see how it all goes from here!</p>
<p>Oldfort - I hope your daughter does not have too much trouble getting all her id replacements. What an unexpected hassle.</p>
<p>Very well put, boysx3. My D seems to be noticing (esp after last night with NYE parties with the same old people and “high schoolers, Mom! Ew!”) that life here in the hometown won’t change and neither will life for her friends who stayed here, and that her life at school is showing itself to be very different from theirs. She was so excited about being back and being with her friends, but is getting disillusioned. She loves being home but hopefully this shows her she’s indeed moving onward and upward.</p>
<p>D2 is home for the first time for longer than few days. Our apartment is about 1500 sq ft, so it is quite small compared to our previous home. I thought we would be on top of each other and getting on each other nerves, but we are all getting along very well. D2 enjoys getting out by herself in NYC. With an unlimited metro card she could get any where. She has been taking ballet classes, meeting up with friends who happen to be in town, and doing a lot of errands for me (shopping for Christmas and now doing returns). We are going away next week for some sun and then she is going back to school. I am going to miss her.</p>
<p>D2 is going to start looking for a summer job as soon as goes back to school. I told her not to wait until last minute. Next semester is going to be a busy one for her. She has the rush as soon as she returns (no classes yet). If she gets in she will be very busy socially, so I hope she is not going to get overwhelmed. She has signed up for 5 classes, one of them is econ, hope it is not too much.</p>
<p>Oldfort, I am really sorry that your daughter’s wallet was taken. Does she remember when/how it happened? My daughter goes to school in NYC and I’ve told her to wear the strap of her handbag across her chest, rather than over her shoulder. I would love to share details (if you have them) of what happened to your D with my D. </p>
<p>My daughter is already back in NYC. She was home for ten days, which she felt (based on many of the same observations you made, boysx3), was the right amount of time. We spent a lot of time together while she was home and she also managed to see the friends from high school that she has (and feels she will continue to) kept in touch with. She starts an internship the second week in January and also works a part-time job, so for her, even with school not being in session (classes don’t start at her university until February), she has a fairly full schedule. </p>
<p>I completely understood my daughter not wanting to return home for the entire six weeks of vacation. After my freshman year in college, I only returned home for short periods of time. I can really relate to not wanting to leave the wonderful life that has been created away from home. I think the fact that I understand this, and felt the same way myself, makes our separation(s) easier. That… and the fact that I’ve already traveled to NYC a few times to see her. </p>
<p>I am glad that the adjustment to college life has, for the most part, gone so well for all of your kids. Happy New Year to all!</p>
<p>My daughter was carrying a small bag over her shoulder. The zipper was left open a bit and she had it behind her rather than in front of her. She was in a crowded store where it wouldn’t be strange for someone to bump into her or touch her. I always carry a large (deep) purse so it would be very hard for anyone to reach in. We had to file police report to prevent identity theft. It was good that she didn’t have her SS card with her. If your kid goes to school in NYC, I would have her keep her school ID and room key in a separate place, as D2 goes to school Ithaca I wasn’t as concerned with her safety.</p>
<p>MizzBee, D went to F&M planning on majoring in Animal Behavior, we had suggested that she do Pre-Vet as well, as she had spent 200+ hours shadowing our vet and really enjoyed it. So the Chem was more for the pre-vet than the Animal Behavior, fortunately, as she has now decided that she has no intention of a pre-health program (more chemistry) as well as she does not want to go to school for 7.5 more years :-). We are hoping she can take chemistry over the summer locally, and master it, just to boost her confidence, but the school wants to pre-approve it and the rules are pretty stringent - maybe we’ll have her do it anyway even if they won’t give her credit for it. She is taking Bio in the spring, I’m hoping she got enough chemistry in to not have trouble with the Bio. She read prof reviews very carefully before selecting classes - which wasn’t an option first semester.</p>