<p>@collegetime18 - lol! I think your son and mine would like each other, though mine would be digging for sand crabs and making pets out of them. Yes, exactly. He’s not your stereotypical southern CA beach kid at all. I am assuming and hoping he will find his tribe at Santa Barbara if that is where he decides to go. (and it’s 99.9% he will.) Santa Barbara is much closer than Santa Cruz, which I think will be a plus. He’s pretty introverted and it will be easier to check on him. I think your son will love Berkeley’s progressiveness. </p>
<p>@petraelise, we won’t be doing the Spotlight event. We toured the school last year and he’s got a pretty good memory for it. He’s pretty much got his heart set on Santa Barbara and the only stopper would be if he suddenly hates it this coming Saturday at the Insight event. </p>
<p>Ugh… I guess we parents sometimes need to grieve the schools that our students decline. I didn’t need a drawing app to see him at Santa Cruz. </p>
<p>Well @beadymom, I can’t say that I’m happy to hear that! I was kind of hoping he’d end up in Michigan so we could actually meet! I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to dinner that night. </p>
<p>I have to start prepping for the grad party because, since BarnardGirl and my Dad are both coming in from out of state, we have to have it the day after graduation. So it will be May 31. That isn’t too far away! </p>
<p>Our irony with school options is that the more prestigious one is also the cheaper option BUT it’s the one that he’s most worried about because it is such a huge school and he really liked the small intimate campuses. I think, once he’s there and gets to know the place, he will absolutely love all the opportunities it affords him. It’s going to be really scary for him at first though. It will help that he’ll be in a special learning community which provides smaller class sizes and guarantees housing in a great dorm for two years. He will also LOVE the football games (yeah, I’m talking about Michigan) because he has a ton of school spirit and loves sports. He’ll probably also go to hockey games. The food options are so much better at Michigan. The other school is the size of his high school so there’s really only one cafeteria and one snack shop. Even if the food is great, I’m sure they have like a 3 week menu rotation that he will tire of, you know? He is a super practical kid though and I think when he sees the difference in the amount of loans he would have he’ll choose Michigan. He is very very frugal. He’ll bite the bullet and choose Michigan even though he’ll be very worried about going there. Once he adjusts, he’ll be fine. He was a kid who hated change. When he was in pre-school, if we had to switch which day he was going one week, we had to let him know a day or two in advance so he could adjust to the idea. He was very worried about starting middle school and then high school but did great in both. Every time he is faced with a new situation, he gets very worried, but he always handles it like a champ. I keep pointing that out. Typically, the way he deals with fear is by learning as much as he can about the thing he’s afraid of. I suspect once a decision is made for sure, he’ll bury himself in learning more about the school. </p>
<p>@Calla1 – that’s too bad, D14 would have been right there with him looking for sand crabs, lol. Fossils would have intrigued her as well, @collegetime18. UCSC has long been a favorite of mine, because I just know she will fit in so well there – but she was really resistant to it until she got declined from UCB. Then she started evaluating it on its own merits, and really has come to view it as the perfect fit. Both of your kids have selected amazing schools, and I’ve no doubt that they will thrive there equally as well. </p>
<p>@2016BarnardMom --D15 made a comment at UCSD the other day at being surprised how much she liked it, even though it is so big. She had been preferring a smaller school inititally. So you just never know-- maybe what seemed a negative may end up being a positive down the road.</p>
<p>Congrats @Cakeisgreat and @njl1022 on decisions! @njl1022 - I know what you mean. We’ve encountered the same thing. I’m planning on calling FA ofc of in-state school tomorrow in hopes they can increase FA to come closer to EFC with something other than loans. As it stands now, our D’s private option (with a sticker price we could never consider) is ending up about $5,000/year less expensive than in-state, public college.</p>
<p>My thinking, @PetraElise, is that at a big school, you’ll definitely find a niche because there are more people with more varied interests. At a small school, you may not find your “tribe” but rather be stuck with the 300 kids in your class- like it or not. </p>
<p>Hijacking my kids membership here. Getting ready to send our third child off to college this fall. Older daughter is finishing her MBA, son his PHd and younger daughter will be entering freshmen in fall 2014. I will truly have empty nest syndrome. Just wish the youngest wasn’t going to school 3000 miles away! At least her brother will be close at a nearby school and I can visit both with one plane ticket. She got her first choice school along with four others and a safety. I know I should be happy but am dreading those first few weeks next fall completely childless for the first time. I tease my husband and tell him I will just move out to Palo Alto for a few months until she’s comfortable and settled in. Any advice how not to let the sadness overtake the joy? </p>
<p>@Sinaj - I think it helps to plan to resume your life more according to your own interests, and not view it so much as an impending loss, but an opportunity to regain a little bit of yourself. That said, I am also sending my youngest off several hundred miles away, with the older two both far away as well. congratulate yourself on a job well done and your holidays will be joyous get togethers, no doubt!</p>
<p>@2016BarnardMom - my d evolved over time to even thinking 5k student campuses were too small for her. Probably has a lot to do with the fact she grew up in a very small private school with 30 kids per grade. It was great for her at the time and very nurturing, but she is now ready to spread her wings. Plus, it’s impossible to be really good friends with what - 30 people? I mean you’ll have acquaintances but I think at big schools you make your world smaller. You become friends with the people on your floor or in your dorm, your classes and your clubs. </p>
<p>@Sinaj - it’s great advice to look ahead at the positives, though I know I’m going to have a tough time. I will admit to thinking how nice it will be to have a little more freedom - I won’t have to worry about making dinner every night, I always tried to be home when d got home from school, and I have always been that person who put everyone else first. I’m tempering my sadness with a little excitement. I’m also getting a maine coon cat - lol </p>
<p>@glido - How wonderful, with going to school that far from home, that your DS and DD can be just down the road from each other! Pretty amazing with all the schools out there to choose from. That has to put your mind and heart (and @Moonmaid’s with her two boys at Tulane) at ease.</p>
<p>@2016BarnardMom - I totally agree. I think the kids who are a little out of the mainstream are going to be happier at a larger school where they are more likely to find kids of every type! Finding the right friends may take a year or so, but they will be there.</p>
<p>Feeling sick here. S’s GC just informed me H is coming in to “discuss his college list.” A little late, don’t you think? H has not been involved at all in putting together the list or applying. I bet now he’ll insist S doesn’t have to go away to college. I am trying to hope for the best but really queasy.</p>
<p>@calla1 Regarding CCS at UCSB: if it helps any, I transferred there and I was a VERY liberal, hippie type student and didn’t feel out of place. Of course the more general UCSB vibe (party town, fairly typical mainstream “college” vibe) was not really my thing but I had no problem finding my tribe. Between the other artists at CCS and the staff of the Daily Nexus newspaper, where I worked, I found enough passionate, liberal like-minded friends.</p>
<p>Kind of funny, this is not a political conversation, but most schools are so un- apologetically in the tank liberal I find it funny people are worried they aren’t liberal enough. Both my kids wanted more apolitical places, it was not easy to find. Neither are into marches, sit ins, etc. </p>
<p>@eyemamom : My S is like your kids in that he preferred schools with a more apolitical atmosphere. He found the Rice campus to be fairly apolitical and that is part of the reason that he believes that Rice is a great fit for him. He has some very strong political opinions, but none of them could be easily classified as “liberal” or “conservative,” and he knows that no campus exists where most, or even a significant number of, kids will agree with him on most issues. So he is not planning on getting politically involved at all and will direct his energy in other directions. </p>
<p>@Classof2015 - good luck. My friend at work is going through this process trying to negotiate finances with an ex-H, and it has been painful to say the least. As if it weren’t stressful enough without that part.</p>
<p>@eyemamom – my kids are liberal minded, but they are not specifically looking at any school with regards to will they have opportunities to march, etc. It’s more about will their social/cultural comfort level be met – and that’s only an issue if the school was super conservative. I don’t think people were mentioning that UCSC is very liberal because their students want to protest, but more as a caution to very conservative students, that they might not feel comfortable in such a liberal environment. </p>
<p>I guess this long process of Admission and acceptance is over for us.</p>
<p>S has finally Accepted admission to UM Florida. Full Tuition and Major Neuroscience with a pre-med track.
Hard to drop other 3 schools ( Pitt, MU and UA) since they all were good fit for him and great FA pkgs…</p>
<p>Still on a Waitlist for NU and WUSTL but not much hope their …</p>