S has a late start date in September as they are on the quarter system…which means that we have done some serious procrastinating.
Since he is going across the country, I thought I’d try the Bed Bath and Beyond pack and hold option. Does anyone know how it works? Do I go to the store and pick everything out and pay locally but pick up at the store close to campus?
@cd2015 – it has occurred to me that being out of big sister’s shadow might be a good thing for my younger D – but we will see whether she actually likes it or not! Right now they constantly hang out together when they’re home, so for younger D it’s going to be like losing a roommate.
@Felicita – that’s how I understand it works. We were originally planning to do it that way, but we ended up just buying what we needed and taking it home. The way I look at it, having to fit everything in the car will act as a limiter on how much D tries to bring along – if it won’t fit in the car, it probably won’t fit in her half of a small dorm room.
Well, everybody… got into my room today and met 2 of my 3 suitemates. I think the fellow AE major and I will get along great. I only saw the other person long enough to say hi. Moving in was far easier than we’d imagined. We got my bank account set up while the banker told us how her husband was an AE grad who has worked for an aerospace company in the area for years… seems like you can’t throw a rock around here without hitting someone with some positive connection to WSU’s AE program. :))
The only wrinkles we’ve ran into so far is that the book for my chemistry class isn’t in yet and my phone has decided not to send texts to my mom’s. Should be in “soon” on the book. I hope so… We’re working on the phone issue, and will hopefully have that fixed by tomorrow. It’s actually going really well!
The Walmart was crawling with WSU stuff. Signs, balloons, posters, shirts, cups. napkins, even baby clothes. Not kidding, there were racks with baby clothes saying stuff like “I will be a Shocker” etc. It’s crazy. There’s a lot of school pride in this area, to put it lightly…
Re: being the only kid left at home…
My DD’15 didn’t want to feel “awkward” being the only child at home…we hosted an exchange student for a school year…after that she was quite happy to be the only one at home. 
@bopper., what a nice idea! Can you recommend any such programs? I know nothing about this.
Veteran parents , need some advice here… Can you share some advice regarding future family vacation scene? Is a typical “family vacation” - completely out of picture? Do kids even want to hang out with their parents? Do they care if parents now go to nicer places than nearby attractions? How does this change? I ask because we have many good memories of our vacations. I am unsure what to expect in this area with this whole college thing… I understand last 2 years , internships and jobs are in the mix… but any experience you share will go a long way in making my expectations better! Thank you in advance!
We used Youth For Understanding…I liked it because they had a ton of support for both the exchange student and the hosts. You also have an area representative that meets with the student monthly to make sure everything is going okay and to help parents with any issues. They also have a couple of orientation gatherings in your geographical area where the exchange students and families get together…you can hear from other parents about their issues/triumphs and get ideas. The students can also make friends with each other.
@cd2015 We have a college graduate + my 2015er and we still went on vacations during college and even after.
We would ask if she would like to come with us and I think for the most part she did…but we would have to tell her what we were planning and she would see if it sounded interesting.
It is interesting now that DD2011er is 21…she likes to drink wine at dinner and especially have us pay for it for her!
I think she likes getting together with the family on occasion and also realizes it is nice for a paid for vacation…Just last week we went out to the Seattle area for a Bat Mitzvah…we asked both girls if they wanted to come and made plans to have a condo that could sleep 4 if they decided to come…eventually they decided they did want to come but complained about the pull out couch…I said “next time someone offers a free vacation tell them right away so they can plan around you better!!”
Up until now the girls have had similar spring breaks…the 2011er just was offered a teaching job so her spring break will be at a different time than the 2015er college spring break…
@Felicita, We di the BBB pack and hold thing and this is how it worked: go to BBB’s registry desk. They will look up your school and find the closest BBB to the school, or you can chose a different store if that is closer to where you’ll stay for move in. After setting up the registry they give you a scanner. you “zap” items that you want to purchase. After you are done, you go back to the registry desk and they check with the delivery store to see if they have the items you chose. They box up the items in your name and wait for you to purchase. You don not have to purchase everything you scan and you do not pay until you pick up, so don’t forget the coupons!
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When D did this the “registry”, the school BBB didn’t have all of the items she scanned available (they tell you right away whether they are available at the pack and hold store), so she decided to purchase some of them locally. Also, We scanned some towels and sheets that we will not need because we found better close out towels locally and decided to purchase one set of sheets now so we could wash them before she arrived at the dorm. We ended up doing the pack and hold event twice because she couldn’t make decisions the first go-round. All and all, it was pretty easy.
Family vacations did not change for us while me and my siblings were in college. Just like with kids in HS, my parents worked vacations around our college schedules. They were happy to have late May through early June available to go on vacation.
The only thing that got tricky was that I was living with someone at college, so we initially went on vacations separately with our families which really bummed us out (bf got mono at Disney so I was joking that he “must have been kissing someone” while he was away).
Even after they graduated college, my siblings lived at home so they were invited to all family vacations but could say no if they wanted to.
I think it depends on the family and what the kids will be doing during college breaks. Once my bf and I were working in the summer, we went on weekend vacations with my family on occasion, but no long vacations in the summer.
Even after we were married (young, right after college), my parents (who we lived several hours from) did invite us on family vacations, which we took them up on, flying out of our local airport to join them. The assumption was that soon enough we “wouldn’t have time for them” so they might as well invite us. Of course, the interests of a young married couple vs. that of young unmarrieds are somewhat different, so though we accompanied my parents on some beach vacations, my siblings generally opted to stay home as they were in relationships where they didn’t feel right taking their gf or bf, but didn’t want to go away without them.
I would NOT force your kids to go on vacation with you, heck, even in HS if they had a big commitment like a summer program (and could stay with close friends you vet or family). But it can be very nice to go on vacation with an adult who is your child.
(I could not deal with an exchange student in our family, I freak about too many unknowns, but more kudos to anyone who would host. When I was growing up, there were many years between the youngest and oldest siblings so the oldest was back from college and living at home by the time the youngest started going to college - no empty nest therefore.)
Does anyone know if the power of attorney documents should be ones for the home state or the one they are going to? Also for the HIPPA medical info release form - the university has one for university health services but should I get a general one and again - for my home state or the one he is going to or both?
POA is transferable across state lines, is it not?
HIPAA release forms are specific to the individual doctor or hospital, I do not think they are transferable to a new doctor or hospital. That’s why you need a POA.
In the case of my aunt, she had no children or siblings, so a nephew made medical decisions for her. His POA trumped her living will, by the way.
This might help explain it:
https://www.caring.com/questions/hipaa-release-form
every medical provider
If you are very worried, for example if your child has a medical condition like diabetes etc., I suppose you could print out a generic HIPAA form from your state and have your child sign it and list your name on it, and carry it in their wallet.
This may also help:
http://www.hhs.gov/ocr/privacy/hipaa/understanding/coveredentities/personalreps.html
(medical POA is necessary, for adults whether they be your children or parents or anyone else, apparently)
Legal advice is probably a good idea.
T-4 days for us - well, T-3 for our travel time. This past weekend, my older daughter came home for the weekend (her husband has been working around the clock on finishing up his current research so he can get published, get his doctorate and move on to post-doc work) so we did some weirdo family fun stuff. We went to my older sister’s house and my older sister dyed my D’s hair blonde, which only served to make the red her hair was already dyed more vivid. Then we all watched Trollhunter. Later that day, we had a dinner which I invited my family to, but only my older sister was able to make (in addition to some friends!), at my D’s favorite restaurant. In addition to celebrating my daughter, we also did some wedding planning for me! The next day, we went with my SIL and her kids to IKEA and picked up a new duvet cover and a couple of organizational items for D.
She’s been going to other friends’ get-togethers for the past couple of days, and a whole bunch of them are going to get up at 3am tomorrow to climb a local “mountain” (not actually a mountain) to watch the meteor showers.
My D is planning to get a tattoo tomorrow afternoon. I’m not actually in favor of this plan, I don’t mind tattoos on other people, but I made her, so I feel a little sad that she is making a permanent alteration. Is that weird? She’s getting the first 4 measures of Durufle’s Ubi Caritas tattooed on her right side. I have a small hope that she will chicken out - she hates getting shots, after all.
I got out some vacuum bags for her today so she can pack clothes. She’s got 5 huge bags of stuff to take to Goodwill! We can actually see the floor in her room!
@Irishmomof2. Good golly about that tattoo. I am not a fan at such a young age. My good friend’s son decided to get a tattoo at the end of June (about one week after high school graduation). He wanted an image of a very content-looking dog, which he believed would give him happiness when he gazed at it. He researched tattoo artists and settled on one in California (we live in New Jersey). He and his mother flew out to California and he got the tattoo, which the artist said had to be very large in order to look good on his forearm. Well, the tattoo is huge and it has not brought this young man the happiness he was anticipating. My advice would be for your daughter to think long and hard about what she is hoping to get out of this tattoo. If her expectations don’t seem reasonable, perhaps she will consider waiting?
While I can’t control most of what my kids do once they hit 18, I have asked them not to do anything permanent to their bodies until after they are 24-25, at which point (presumably) their frontal lobe is fully developed.
I got my first two tats at age 19, and I am still very happy with them. I am working on a huge one on my back. I have the outline, but it’s expensive, so I am paying for the color and detail one section at a time.
@felicita - there is a BBB, Walmart and every other type of store within 5-6 miles. Your biggest issue is going to be a bike and we spent a couple of days trying to find the right one in a target or walmart around. I guess we could have just caved in and spent an extra 100-150 to buy one from the bike shop on campus.
D1 asked me my thoughts on tattoos. I told her you see them on athletes, and rock and blues musicians, and blue collar workers; you don’t see them on doctors and lawyers and engineers and economists and philosophers, and others in educated professions. I have a strong opinion that tattoos are a very low class phenomenon, and seeing one on her could cause anyone to seriously question her judgment.
It’s like the old saying, you never get a second chance to make a first impression. People make assumptions and judgments about each other within seconds of meeting; do what you can to ensure they are good ones.
You may not see them; that does not mean they do not have them.
Obviously you are entitled to your opinion, but the sporting of tattoos has long gone beyond a phenomenon of being primarily seen on sailors. For better or worse, tattoos are the new black.
Every parent can, of course, set the rules for his/her minor children, and express their preference for their independent kids.
@FCCDAD “tattoos are a very low class phenomenon”. What a sad opinion. My tattoos and my career stand in marked opposition to your narrow view, and I’m certain I’m not the exception to your “rule”.