Parents of the HS Class of 2019 (Part 1)

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
3021

Woooooff @Gatormama that list really is all over the place! I can speak to a couple, though, having gone through ths whittling-down process with my D17.

On paper, we thought Wesleyan would be perfect and her top choice. The campus tour was downright WEIRD, though, and enough that she didn’t even apply at all. The Wes campus was so quiet (it was around 11 in the morning, school was in session at the time) you would have thought it was a semester break. The buildings are a mish-mosh of architectural types, with the only really “pretty” building being the library. The library really is a knockout, though. Inside the library, there was the scene you’d expect – students studying – and weirdly, a sensory deprivation tank. It was the depressing campus atmosphere, so quiet, that was so surprising. There were only around 10 people on the central green. The dorm we saw was dingy and old. To compare, the Syracuse U culture was boisterous, happy, and buzzing. My D17 said that what she would like is the size of a LAC but a happy campus. She saw that at Union and put “happy students” at the top of her list. But she got into her ED school so didn’t apply to Union.

Her ED school was Colorado College, which I see is on your list. Fair warning, even though lots of people haven’t heard of it, its acceptance rate this past year was 14.8%. That’s pretty low. D17 went to an accepted students’ overnight there and continued to love everything about it. It’s a different type of school, though, using what they call the Block Plan. Happy, happy kids, who work hard and love the outdoors. I recommend you spend some time familiarizing yourself with Colorado College’s website before applying, as it’s really an unusual school with a very personal approach to teaching.

I went to Skidmore, also on your list. Granted, this was back in the Stone Age, but I had a good time. I met my husband there and both of us are very happy alums. It’s a lot easier to get into than some of the other schools on your list. Last year, acceptance rate was I believe 29%??? Maybe that was two years ago already. One of the great things about Skidmore is its town, Saratoga Springs. Truly, one of the best college towns! So much fun. I saw Jimmy Buffet and the Grateful Dead and a couple other concerts at SPAC, the Saratoga Performing Arts Center. It’s not a small city but as a town there is plenty going on.

Bucknell. It’s a good school! But the frat scene there is pretty indelible. Unavoidable and the main source of socializing. Last year, Bucknell had to pay to settle a hazing lawsuit. http://www.pennlive.com/news/2016/03/bucknell_to_pay_75000_to_settl.html So, it depends on what campus culture you/your kid wants.

I see Bowdoin and Colby are on your list. If my D17 didn’t get into her ED school, she would have applied to them and Bates. They are really pretty and strong in the biological sciences (D17 will major in bio). I’m relieved she isn’t going to one of them, though, because we live in SoCal and they are realllllly hard to get to from here.

Middlebury is a terrific LAC and the kids there love it. Like Colorado College and Bucknell U., though, it’s a specific kind of school for a specific kind of person. It is super remote. The kids who fit best there aren’t urban, obviously, but also are happy to b e isolated and in the midst of nature. We looked at it for a hot minute for D17 but decided it was too remote. Happy outdoorsy students, though, and the happiness of the student body is important for a good collegiate experience!

That’s it from me. Hopefully other people can chime in with their experiences at other colleges.

3022

wow @JenJenJenJen Maybe I should post our tentative list and get your feedback. You are a wealth of information!!

3023

Ugh. Just realized the end of my last sentence got cut off. Of course, it’s way too late to edit it.

I had wondered @Gatormama if your daughter has yet taken an ACT or SAT?

3024

Great feedback and really really helpful! The tour info about Wesleyan is quite eye-opening, @JenJenJenJen and I know exactly what you mean and again, it’s a pity we are on opposite coast because your kids sound SO much like mine.

We’re both quite aware that she’s an academic reach for a lot of schools on that list.

I know that several of the schools are a financial reach also. We are squarely in the upper-middle-class doughnut hole and won’t be able to pay anything close to even our EFC – but I have steeled myself to keep researching them, just so we can compare what they offer for the high cost to what schools in our actual range offer. I knew Colorado College had the tiniest acceptance rate on the list (it’s one of my spreadsheet columns) – and it is not at all likely, but there it sits, along with Bowdoin and Bucknell and others at the same level: a reminder of our financial limitations and her stats limitations :slight_smile: …

FWIW, her high school starts block scheduling this upcoming year so it’ll be interesting to see how she likes it.

She’s doing intensive SAT/ACT prep in August and takes the SAT Aug. 26, @mom2twogirls … she did pretty average on the no-prep 10th-grade PSAT; she took the SAT in eighth grade and made the CTY cutoff, but I don’t think that really means much years later.

3025

@Gatormama I’m familiar with Southwestern. Pretty campus, great merit aid, great professors, great study abroad, close to Austin, located in a nice little town.

3026

@Gatormama – we have eight schools from your list on our still-needs-to-be-whittled-down list of 34 schools. (Alleghany, Goucher, Muhlenberg, Otterbein, Slippery Rock, CCM, Ursinus, Ohio U).

D19’s schools are centered on theatre tech and digital media, and we have also added Virginia schools from an in-state affordability perspective.

WVU was on our list but then we took it off after driving through/around the campus (too big a school for D19 and when we went, it appeared to be a huge party school, and D19 didn’t like that).

We will be driving through/around Muhlenberg and Ursinus (plus 3 other schools: Juniata, Susquehanna, and SUNY Purchase) next month as part of our vacation travel. I’m happy to post summaries once we do - D has friends attending these schools.

I know Emerson strictly from its location and not based on its programs – I’m a Boston U alum and am frequently in the area. For us, we would not have the $$$ to pay for it, but the location is fabulous as well as its reputation.

Other schools we have on the list for theatre tech:
Carnegie Mellon (only on list as The Big Reach school)
Christopher Newport U
Coastal Carolina U
James Madison U (in-state and probably D’s top choice right now)
Monctair State U
UNC School of the Arts
VCU Arts (in-state and probably D’s second choice right now)
Wright State U

3027

@OrangeFish If you’re looking at Coastal Carolina , you may want to drive another hour south to College of Charleston. They have a great computing in the arts degree, arts management, and theatre major . Very strong arts and theatre presence in the Charleston community . It might be worth a look .

3028

Thank you, @carolinamom2boys – not sure we could afford the out-of-state $$$ but we’ll add it to the plan-to-drive-to list since we’ll be close by. :slight_smile:

3029

On Thursday, my D19 finished the super compressed 17 day first semester of online Latin 2. It was stressful but not as bad as last summer because I found a retired Latin teacher to come over a couple of times to tutor her. That also helped keep her on pace, which was a huge problem last summer. There were 65 assignments that needed to be done in 17 days, plus a 2 part final exam! (The last day was the final, so basically the pace was at least 4 assignments per day for 16 days.) She did great and ended up with a 98%, so she gets an A (our district doesn’t do pluses or minuses).

Tomorrow we drop her off at a 2 week speech & debate camp (she does speech events, not debate). While she’s there H and I are going on an Alaskan cruise! After the speech & debate camp, she’s going to start the second semester of Latin 2 with Florida Virtual School which is much more self paced and she can take more time to complete that semester. Then she’ll have her 2 years of foreign language to be eligible for our in state universities. For the first time she’s open to the possibility of doing Latin 3 – largely because she really hit it off with the tutor – but one step at a time.

3030

@Gatormama Your list looks like mine - kind of all over the place right now. D19 isn’t sure what she wants in a school yet so it is hard to come up with a more cohesive list right now.

Our only overlaps are Bowdoin, Colby and Goucher. From what I have read I think Goucher might be a little too hipster for her. I don’t know what to do about Bowdoin, Colby (and Bates for us) because of the no merit aid thing. We have been going to the town next to Bowdoin every summer since before D19 was born. She has known about it forever, wears hats and sweatshirts from Bowdoin, always thought it would be on her list. Then I came on here and started to realize we would be paying about $70,000 a year for it - yikes! I hate to take it off the list but not sure if we think any school is worth $70,000.

We are heading back up there in a few weeks and I haven’t even decided if we should do the tour. We have the same situation with Bates - hate to take it off the list because my brother and father went there. She has seen both colleges but never really explored them -maybe we will do the tours and she won’t even like them!

UF is also on my list but not D19’s list. She has no interest in going there - too big, too many people we know went or are going there (we live in FL.) I am making her go up in the fall anyway - I figure she might as well see it before she crosses it off completely and we have friends with season passes to the football games so why not. It is also the closest huge school we can get to so that will help her get a feel for them.

Oh - last thing - I know you want your list to get smaller but if you are willing to look at schools in the middle of nowhere maybe check out St. Lawrence. It has theater and lacrosse (but I don’t know much about this programs) and gives a lot of merit aid. I went there and loved it - definitely dragging D19 there too. :slight_smile:

3031

@momtogkc I hear you about Bowdoin, etc. I’ll be curious how you decide whether those schools stay on the list. Right now, I have one list with schools that offer merit aid. I’ve tried to flush out the chances of S19 getting aid at each of the schools. Honestly, we aren’t looking at the usual suspects for aid (the Alabamas…or the lesser known LACs). Most of the schools on our merit list are still pretty selective:

Grinnell
Oberlin
Kenyon
Wake Forest
Richmond
Davidson
Lafayette
Macalester

Our safety category with schools that could offer merit or are around $50,000 (total) without merit:

University of Maryland (possible honors)
University of Vermont (possible honors)
Denison
Pitt (possible honors)
University of Wisconsin (don’t love their honors program but we will learn more)

Then I have a list of schools that I think would be terrific, but there will be no money:

Carleton
Bowdoin
Middlebury
Northwestern (maybe, depending on major)

My husband is insistent that we keep UIUC on the list since we pre-paid tuition for both of our kids when they were young but he knows deep down that UIUC is not a good fit for them. If they were interested in engineering, business, or comp sci then I think it would be a better match.

My plan is to investigate the first two lists of schools above and see if we can pull together a list of safeties and matches from those. Once we have SAT scores in hand, we will have a better idea about merit on most of them (except Wake, Davidson, and Lafayette which seem to be much tougher to win the few merit awards they give). After researching and visiting all of those schools, if we think there’s a better match somewhere else that will be full pay, we may let S19 apply but not fall in love. We have the money but we just struggle with WHY we should use it for undergrad (or even just for school in general) when he will hopefully have options less expensive than $280,000. Even if a school costs us $50,000 per year, that’s still a savings of $80K. A huge amount of money!

S19 understands. We’ve already talked a bit about how we could maybe help with grad school if undergrad is a bit less expensive. I’m so curious how this will all turn out!

3032

A lot of parents use the “we could help with grad school if you save us money for college” line of thinking with their kids. I, obviously, see the logic, but I’m torn between sending my 2 kids to schools that really suit them (probably small, expensive LAC’s) and saving for the post-grad work I know they will need. My parents paid for college, but I went to a big state school, that I never really liked. I put myself through grad school (interestingly at the same big state school) with stipends and work-study. Aren’t there more opportunities for that in grad school? Having done that, I really value the degree.

3033

@Acersaccharum Yes. I suppose it makes sense to look into how students can pay for grad school. I’ll put in on my list of things to do! :wink:

Our neighbors sent their girls to private highly-selective LACs and then, after working a few years, both girls are in grad school at Michigan. They agree that they’ve had the best of both worlds. Small classes and lots of attention for undergrad and lots of school spirit at their grad school.

3034

We will not be able to afford expensive SLACs at $70K per year * 2 kids + grad school * 2 kids and cover our retirement + health care + etc. Sorry, kiddos! :slight_smile: Find an employer who covers grad school costs!

3035

@OrangeFish Exactly. That’s what bums me out. We’ve always lived frugally. We’ve saved some money in 529s but not enough to cover private college full price. Our “retirement” savings isn’t all in retirement accounts and we never intended to use it for education yet it is included in our assets and affects our EFC. In the end, I guess it’s only up to us if we dip into those accounts for school or put our foot down and say that money is for me and my husband…not for the kids. We may have unforeseen expenses coming up (possibly helping my parents financially or who knows what else). I would hate to spend any money that we don’t need to and then wish we had it for something else.

When you’re used to being frugal (like really frugal- we live on less than half of our income), it’s hard to switch course and decide that anything (including school) is worth full price!

3036

For everyone looking at LACs, if your kids are high stats, top 10% of the class, SAT of 1300 or an ACT of 28 consider having your GC nominate them in the spring of their Jr year for the Wofford Scholars program. It requires a visit before Nov of their Sr year and participation in an interview weekend in Nov of their Junior year on a Sat, but we found them to be quite generous with aid which placed COA in the 25,000 to 30,000 range . Furman also has a similar program but requires a 29 on the ACT or 1360 on the SAT. Also requires a nomination Jr year by GC. They were also generous , but their COA is higher.

3037

@momtogkc - We have so many similarities! My D goes to a tiny high school - 300 total enrollment - and I thought for sure she would be intimidated by a big school like UF, but the opposite happened when we visited. It was like when we visit NYC - she was entranced by the hustle and bustle, so different from her cozy school where everyone knows everyone else.

I laughed when you said your D didn’t want to go there b/c too many people she knows would be there: it’s SO big. She need never, ever see anyone she doesn’t want to see. The camaraderie I experienced at UF was actually surprising: It comes from your college, once you are settled in your major. Then the faces become familiar. But the first-year classes - oof - I remember taking Econ 101, with 150 kids in a lecture hall taking notes from a videotape played on a TV at the front of the room, because the class had so many students in it. I only saw the guy in real life once, at the end of the year, when I was begging for some favor and had to go to office hours.

The tour is pretty sweet; the video almost made me tear up. Lots of pride at UF, deservedly so. And you get to go to the Swamp! SO jealous!! That’s on the tour also.

(I went to grad school there after going to a tiny LAC for undergrad, which I hated. Too small and parochial; couldn’t wait to get out. I had to take about a year of undergrad courses, though, to fulfill the master’s requirements, so I kind of got the best of both worlds.)

Bowdoin - we have a good friend who’s a prof there, and we’ve also visited a bunch - love Midcoast Maine! That doesn’t make the cost any easier to bear, though, and it’s just on the list because of the personal connection, which might get D a closer look, but isn’t going to make it affordable.

St. Lawrence looks really nice! You said you went there - what did you like about it? Tell me more! I signed up for info; might have to make a trip up there. Our stepdaughter lives in Toronto, so there’s reason to head north. Though I cannot stand snow, my D is fine with it.

3038

@Gatormama @OrangeFish



I can weigh in on the following



Urisnus: absolutely fabulous theater facilities, program seemed really strong even if it wasn’t your major. Strong athletics, I would think it would be solid for LAX either school, club or IM. Small but solid environmental studies program. It’s a solid science school in general. They will offer merit and are very test score focused which can make a huge difference in how good the merit is, We liked it a lot.



Vibe: mix of science, athletics and arts.



Allegheny: top notch for environmental, wonderful wonderful program. Very athletic, would be solid for LAX I would think. Unimpressive theater and music but my student is coming from an unusually amazing HS facility that is hard for most to measure up to. Best merit offer we saw. The location is part of it but the campus is lovely and it was the best food of any tour. We wanted to love it but it just wasn’t my kids tribe.



Vibe: Academic focused athletic



Goucher: seemed arts focused but very dance oriented, did not get a good feel for theater or music. Sports were present but not as apparent at the other two. Very very weak environmental program. Will also offer merit. We expected to like it and it was honestly the only tour we contemplated bailing on but that was largely based on a horrible teacher 1:1 and class visit.



Vibe: artsy.


3039

@Gatormama, SUNY Fredonia might fit env science, lax and theater. @techmom99 has a son starting there in the fall.

3040

Back in the day when I lived 20 minutes from Goucher , it was all female and not well regarded.