Both of my D’s are constantly on social media - Instagram and Snapchat but never Facebook. S23 has no interest. He made accounts but I’m not sure he has ever really used them. This week both D’s were at a concert and sent him snap chats when the singer played songs he likes - he didn’t know for two days when D19 asked if he had seen them. We have had mostly good luck with social media though - we haven’t had any drama but tons of comments like, “You are so beautiful - you are the best - love you…” so that makes me feel a little better.
Have you guys seen the news about the school shooting here in FL? So scary. It is two towns over from us and S23 plays lacrosse with some kids from Parkland. We are pretty sure we don’t know anyone who is old enough to be in high school. I have seen people we know post that their relatives haven’t been heard from though. So crazy to think you can send your kids to school on a random Wednesday and then they don’t come home.
@momtogkc , We live in the next town over from the shooting. My D takes music lessons with many kids who go to this school, and many of DH’s co-workers’ kids go to this school. It’s actually only a few miles from our house. Our whole community is shocked and sick over it. There are no words.
I am so sorry @momtogkc@SunnyFlorida22 =(( =((
It is going to be very hard on the children and teachers.
I hope your community gets all the support needed.
I’m afraid that children in the future will have to attend school where there are daily screenings to gain entrance and will have armed guards everywhere. The schools just don’t seem safe anymore on any level, and it is worrisome to send your kid to the unknown everyday.
I feel terrible for the families that have lost their kids or have been injured/harmed.
The shooting: I used to live in Central Florida, so the shooting feels pretty close despite being 3,500 miles away.
Social media: Complicating it is that there’s so many different sorts of social media. I mean, I’m into social media (and have been since USENET, before anyone called it either social or media) way more than D17, but D17 is more into social media than her mother. D19, though, is as deeply into social media than me—but she does more of the quick-hit chatting with friends sort than the longer-form discussion-oriented ones that I’m into.
Heh,USENET, that brings back memories. “Archiving USENET is like washing toilet paper”, but I do wish I had some of those old threads to read again. Then again, they were probably pretty inane if you weren’t currently involved in the conversation.
We talked about the shooting this morning, it’s likely to be topic du jour at school. There are kids in his school in the foster system, or who have no parents or crappy parents. They have guidance counselors and resource teachers dedicated to those kids. More resources go to the lost kids than to the GT kids, actually. We occasionally resent the short shrift GT kids get at our school, but on days like today we can’t deny that lifting up the people in the worst situations is more important than helping the best ones get further ahead.
@mom2twogirls That makes sense about introverts and tech communication. D19 does have the nicest circle of close friends, and is always so happy when they get together . . . which I facilitate as much as possible. Sometimes when left to her own devices, she will stay on her own with her devices.
As for the shooting news, I couldn’t sleep. Every time there are sirens in our town, I try to judge whether they are headed towards the high school. I agree with @ninakatarina – may more resources go to kids who are falling through the cracks. Also, to research into prevention, and to school safety.
@ninakatarina , I agree with what you said that on days like this we see why it’s so important to focus on troubled or worse off kids. Grades, SATs, college admissions seem less important today. I just want my child to come back home safe. What does it take to stop these incidents that are becoming so regular?
Another local private school just had a code red because a teacher thought she heard a gun shot. This school is only about 10 minutes from the Parkland school. Luckily they are now saying it is all clear, but the poor kids had to go through the entire situation with police with guns drawn storming into their rooms, getting filed out of their classes into the cafeteria, etc. Must be so scary for them.
I went to a panel of admissions officers last night at our high school. I don’t know why I go to these things as it just makes me think I could do their job just as well (as could all of you!). There were three reps. One from a big 10 school, one from an LAC, and one from a mid-sized private. The rep from the LAC was even giving out bad info - told the group that the kids’ AP scores are automatically sent to the colleges when you apply. What? The guidance counselor in charge of the meeting had to correct him.
I did learn a few things afterwards when I talked one on one with the head of counseling at our school. (This is really the reason I went - to get his ear without having to have a meeting.) He knows S19 a little bit because he is the boys track hurdles coach and he’s seen S19 around during practices and meets. I asked him if anyone in the counseling department has any personal relationships with any of the AOs from the schools on his list. I voiced concern that only 5 or 6 kids apply to these schools each year (out of 750 in the class) and that I have no good way to know his chances. He said that the counselors can all advocate well for S19 and that the turnover at the colleges for the AO positions turn over a lot so even the most seasoned GCs at our school don’t necessarily know all of these AOs very well.
He asked about S19’s list and his grades/rigor/SAT score. He seemed so excited and told me that he should have lots of options come this time next year. Pulling from his knowledge of the kids who have gone to places like Carleton and Bowdoin, he thinks S19 has a very good shot. Many of the LACs on our list tell him that they always want more kids from our school and, with S19’s stats, he should fare well. He gave us the advice that he should definitely interview. Admission to these small schools is very personal and they look for that fit. He asked if we had seen Grinnell and if S19 liked it. I said we did and he did. He will be traveling there next week and said he’d be happy to put a little plug in for S19. So, after sitting through a miserable panel, I think it was worth my two hours!
Meanwhile, S19’s guidance counselor is kind of a joke. I tried to ask her these questions the other day on the phone and got none of this info. She had no idea and just told us he should apply widely. And she’s the one that has to write a counselor rec for him and they do not connect. Apparently, the kids write up some sort of personal statement and the counselors use that to write their recs. The head of counseling just told me that S19 should be very specific in his statement and his counselor will use what he gives her. What a joke. So the kids are really writing their own recs. The teacher recs are more important apparently because the colleges know our school is big and that the counselors probably don’t know the kids that well. The teachers are closer to the kids. I really wish we could switch counselors but I don’t know how to do that without looking like a piece of work. I’m just going to ask this dept head whenever I have a question.
@homerdog, why don’t you just ask the counselor you tased with to write the GC LOR? It can’t hurt to ask, especially if he familiar with your S and knows the kinds of schools he is interested in. Worse case, they say no, but who cares, I don’t think you would be burning any bridges or anything. Maybe you could have your son ask that guy if he knows him fro track.
My kids have had the same GC, she is OK, she’s an older lady who has been thru the process a bazillion times. She’s pretty good, but I don’t think she really gets to the know the kids all that well. She seems to like my kids, mostly because they aren’t troublemakers and have made a positive impact at the school. I can tell she really doesn’t like to help the kids who just cruise through school and/or cause problems.
Regarding interviewing, I think it’s important and can help sway things in a kids favor to some extent. My son interviewed at a few places and was awarded merit and got in EA. The one school he really wanted to go to he couldn’t make an interview before applying, although he visited a few times- and he was eventually deferred and waitlisted- with above average stats. I think the interview would’ve helped him there, he had no way to really express his interest in the school directly, and unless your kid struggles to communicate the interviews help to see who the kid really is vs a another “number/sheet of paper”.
@homerdog - sounds like a good idea that you went but I know what you mean about those meetings - so basic. Our high school is very large (around 4000) and there are many counselors. Fortunately my kids have a good one who is the head of the department. However, even she was very clueless about all the out of state LACs to which my D applied. I had to do all my own research and come to CC for information. I even had to let our counselor know that our state flagship only looks at the English and Math scores from the ACT (which is pretty unusual) for admission as well as admission to the honors program. She had no idea.
Robotics build tonight, then get up early for Track Division Championship meet in Boston.
Then we leave and go up to the mountains for a few days. Then SAT prep class for 2 days. Then All State Track meet.
Pretty exhausting vacation week!!
Son got named a league All Star for track and was also asked to be a leader for Robotics next year so he was happy his hard work is paying off.
Hopefully he can find some time to get a bit of rest!!
@RightCoaster Congrats t your son on the great track and robotics news! Hope he has some fun int he mountains before his busy break.
We had yesterday off instead of Monday for some reason. Another mom & I took D and two friends to see University of Miami. It was not on any of their radars but it is only an hour from home so I thought we should at least check it out. I was pretty impressed - for some reason even though I knew it was in the suburb of Coral Gables I thought I had heard it was more of an urban school that blended in with the city. It is actually a very pretty campus with tons of green space, trees, a lake, water features and sculptures. It was didn’t seem too sprawling for a 10,000 person school- all of the academic buildings are near each other and all of the social buildings and the pool are together.
The buildings are simple, white and modern looking - not what we are used to on a college campus but I didn’t hate it. We didn’t get to go into any classrooms but we did go in the library, cafeteria, the gym and a dorm. Everything was great except the dorm - it was just a white cinder block very skinny hallway with tiny dorm rooms. One of D’s friends brothers goes to UM so he met us at the end of the tour - he told us that even though the room seems tiny he and his roommate fit two king beds and a couch in there last year! :))
The girls liked the school but D said it is just too much like being at home - same weather, same palm trees, same architechture and tons of Florida kids.
@eandesmom Itbis a little over 10,000 undergrad and I think about 6,000 grad students. Looks like most of the grad students are not on the main campus although I didn’t ask.
I was surprised too- I thought we would use this visit to see a big, urban school but it turned out to be a medium sized suburban school. :))
So crazy to think you can send your kids to school on a random Wednesday and then they don’t come home.