Hi to all! I haven’t been on the board in awhile due to a busy summer and the new setup. Drop off for D19 went very well. She is so happy at school that I can’t really be sad about her leaving! She loves the outdoor club, the rock-climbing wall, the coffee houses and riding her bike around campus. Her dorm is about 60 kids and they have definitely been bonding over the orientation activities, late night discussions, and going together to try each other’s discoveries and favorite activities.
D19 loves her professors and classes too. She is taking things she wasn’t able to explore in high school like creative writing, philosophy, psychology and acting. I feel like her world has opened up and she is thriving.
I love hearing about everyone’s kids and all the different experiences. Looking forward to reports after Family/Parents Weekends!
@Curiosa Snapchat is one of my tips for parents! If your kid will start a streak with you, you get proof of life every day! Plus most kids are more likely to share a pic with you over Snapchat than text.
Hi all! It’s been three weeks since dropping S19 off at college and I’m missing him a lot but also am relieved that he’s doing well. He seems happy and adjusted but I also don’t think he’d complain if he was having a hard time. It’s so much less stressful for me than my D17s first semester away. I’ve talked to him twice (we had a good conversation last night) and we usually text a little bit each day (I try not to but I can’t help it). So far, he has met a really nice group of guys with whom he works out, plays sports, watches sports etc. He likes having things in common with them as far as life goals, and so far seems to be working hard in classes. I was a bit worried about him taking a 300 level Spanish writing class first semester but he’s liking it and said he enjoyed writing a paper for it over the weekend. He loves his Environmental Sociology class and has gotten involved in some related groups/projects. He also went to a Jewish service with his roommate on Friday night but laughed and said he was embarrassed because he was under dressed. He said he’s going to step up his game and dress nicely next time (which he normally likes to do). Looks like he will be playing club water polo and maybe joining a fraternity (we’ll see). So far, things sound great and we’re looking forward to parents weekend in two weeks - can’t wait to see him!
I’m enjoying everyone’s move-in stories! Glad to hear everyone’s off to a (mostly!) good start. We moved in D19 two weeks ago (can’t believe it’s been that long!)–an across-the-country move, but all went well. We shipped a couple boxes of stuff beforehand (huge thank-you to whomever suggested those Ziploc vacuum bags–they are amazing!!), and then paid for two checked bags, and that pretty much got everything there. There’s an Amazon locker literally right next to her dorm, so that’s been handy for other things. They have a “sponsor group” system where sophomores live with/mentor first-years in small hall groups, and that’s been wonderful. My daughter has a nice sized single but a very social hall/sponsor group, and also bonded wonderfully with her orientation trip group (she was on a backpacking trip for 3 days). She’s absolutely LOVING it there–she truly thinks it’s a special place and has said that you would actually have to work VERY hard to NOT make friends/feel supported (both socially and academically). I truly think she found her place!
Hi all, I too have dropped off the kiddo. Well, technically I dropped him off at the Dart Bus at Logan Airport in Boston and then I joined him 5 days later when he got back from his First Year trip. He got himself to school, dropped off his suitcase in his dorm and then headed off for 5-days of hiking the woods + many activities. I can’t tell you anything that happened on the First Year trip because I was sworn to secrecy but S19 said it was ‘an absolute blast’. He had to be on campus for 5-days early before orientation (after his trip) and it was a bit dead on campus (so kind of weird) but he got a lot done. All the ‘chores’ (like ID, register bike, doing his placement tests, that kind of thing) were done. Lots of pre-orientation fun activities were happening so he kept busy. I helped him get some stuff for his room, but he really didn’t need much since ‘decorating’ was not part of the plan. However…he did ask me to get him a SHOWER CADDY and BATH ROBE!! lol. He was a bit nervous, a little overwhelmed, a little excited, i.e. par for the course.
As for me, I was a bit sad and a little overwhelmed. Also par for the course.
So, we didn’t have time to get D19’s glasses together before she left. Her new frames arrived after she left for college, and we figured that we’d bring them to her over Family Weekend at the end of the month. Turns out that she cannot use contact lenses for chem lab. Overnighted the frames to her, and hopefully she can get lenses there in a decent amount of time. We’ll also have to make sure that she has the funds available for lenses.
Wasn’t sending her to college supposed to end this sort of stuff?
Hard to believe it has only been three weeks, but S19 has settled in. He calls every couple of days for random chats - yesterday’s call was about failing to win the lottery for a USC-Alabama game ticket. Such disappointment from a kid who had never really watched football his whole life:) And while he loves his business classes, his favorite class is an Honors credit called “Experimental Music.” Just 12 students and one professional musician (performs worldwide) doing things like dropping grains of rice on cymbals to create sound. The kind of class some people might roll their eyes at, I’m sure. But for S19, who loves music, it is fascinating. The class will be accompanying the professor as he debuts a new piece at the school concert hall this Sunday - we are excited to be able to attend and see this in action.
And the video-game roommate situation has - sort of - been resolved. S19 hangs out most evenings with a gang he met in another dorm.
@MWolf they don’t wear goggles in chemistry lab? My D brought hers with her from HS (I guess I bought them). Goggles were on the supply list, and I didn’t have to re-pay for them, so I was excited. My D also wears contacts, but hates wearing glasses even though she has a pair. I sent my D to school w/ a year’s supply of contacts so I wouldn’t have to think about it again until next summer.
@jellybean5 Evidently, just wearing goggles is not enough at her college. Perhaps they are thinking of fumes, or if something gets into the eyes despite the goggles, and the eyes need to be flushed out.
@SammoJ That is exactly one of things that college is for - classes that go deep into subjects that are only interesting for kids who are very interested in the topic. I’m glad that the he’s found a way to deal with the video addicted roommate and their giant screen, though it sucks that the burden of dealing with it is entirely on your S.
Got to see S19 again yesterday. We did see him briefly last weekend when his first game just happened to be at a college right near us. It was fun to see him make his collegiate debut right in our backyard (sadly they lost). We came up yesterday for his first home game (yay, they won in a nail biter!). We waited for him after the game to see what he wanted to do, like go out to dinner. Little bugger actually said he wanted to hang out with his friends and could we do breakfast instead?! But then said he was planning to sleep in so could we wait until 10:30ish (no, we have to get on road home). He decided he’d rather sleep in so we went for an early dinner so he could still meet up in time with his friends.
We had some stuff with us he wanted from home so we went up to his suite. His roommate (video game addict) was there, so when we walked in I said hello and he basically turned his back on me and barely acknowledged me!). We went to the backside of the room to set up S19’s stuff and roommate walked out into suite room where S19’s suitemates were introducing themselves to dh and shaking his hand. Dh said hello to roommate and he just stood there, then left the suite. ?
Later at dinner, S19 was talking about his friend group and said he hangs out with a few of his suitemates and some other kids from his dorm. He said the roommate still plays video games nonstop, is a complete slob (he said roommate basically threw everything under his bed and in closet when he told them we were coming by). S19 said he does not interact with his suitemates at all. He then asked us to get airfresheners for his room b/c it smells so bad. He said his roommate never showers. I thought he was joking but then he said his suitemates had to tell him to shower-he said he’s only showered a couple of times since moving in a few weeks ago!! I then asked if maybe his roommate has Asperger’s and we talked about how, considering his lack of social skills and other behavior, this might be why he acts like he does. S19 said the suitemates are all nice to him thankfully, but the boy mainly keeps to himself.
So aside from that, S19 said he’s really happy with his choice and has made some good friends already (coincidentally, one lives about 15 minutes from us which is funny b/c there are only a handful of kids from our state). He likes three out of his five classes. No surprise he doesn’t care for his philosophy class. We said our goodbyes but will see him again next weekend for his next home game. It felt good to know he’s doing well socially as D17 struggled finding her tribe when she first started college, tho thankfully she’s very happy now.
Ugh, @4kids4us , I’m sorry the roommate situation still isn’t resolved, and even sounds worse re the hygiene perspective. Would your S be able to possibly do a room swap in the second semester? Maybe take up a space vacated by someone going to study abroad for example (or are the dorms strictly freshmen only)? Glad your son is enjoying it otherwise.
Well, it’s been just about a month since we flew off cross country to deliver D19 to college and all those nerves etc seem a long way away. She’s gotten into a stride and routine, and seems to be enjoying college both academically and socially, as well as taking advantage of what DC has to offer. Her communication is sporadic (that’s good, she’s busy!) but we usually get at least one or two texts a day, usually more, and photos if she’s been somewhere interesting; and we catch up via group phone call once a week, usually on a Sunday evening, and usually a good catch up of around half an hour. We miss her a lot, but it’s wonderful to hear her adventures and learning and just adulting and being independent. And in the meantime, D26 has started middle school and is off on her mini-independence adventure too.
By the way, if anyone’s kids have cooking facilities - we got D19 the trader joe college cookbook and she loves it, so that’s recommended!
@MWolf Don’t feel too sorry for my S19. Yes, he spends much of his time out of his room to avoid video-game roommate, but… The gang he found centers around a girl he vaguely knew from our town…who is a model (as in actually paid to model)…and is smart…and turns out to be very nice (I met her)…and who adopted my son (rolling eyes here). He’s rather popular with the group, mostly premeds, partly because he is able to help with the honors chem homework.
@4kids4us I’m so sorry for your son. The video game thing in dorm rooms can be so isolating, both for the player and for the roomie. And the hygiene issues sound nearly intolerable. Enough so that he might want to enlist the help of the RA. Does your son’s dorm require “roommate contracts”? I wouldn’t have thought “consistent showering” would need to be in there, but maybe there needs to be a specific agreement. I would guess “doing laundry” might also need to be added.
On another housing note…how in heavens are kids who have only just settled into their new living situations supposed to decide about housing next year already?? S19’s college opens housing apps in 2 weeks. Argh!
A last note, I am so thankful that S19’s final choice college is just over an hour drive away. When he was applying far away I thought, “It will be fine.” But last weekend I got to pop up to watch his music class accompany their professor at a recital, and he is coming over our way this weekend to attend our high school’s swim meet (he was a varsity swimmer) and hang out with little brother.
@SJ2727 and @SammoJ if I made it sound like S19’s roommate situation is unbearable, it’s not. Honestly, it’s his roommate for whom I feel bad. While I’m sure S19 would have preferred a more sociable roommate, he is quite happy with his suitemates as well as the dorm he lives in. Fortunately his actual room is not like a typical 2 person room where the beds often are parallel to each other with only about 4-5’ between them. Instead, it’s a very long room with back to back large closets in the middle that essentially divide the room in half. When they are both lying on their beds, they can’t see each other so it feels more private than a typical double. S19 does have to walk thru his roommate’s side to get to his but the roommate would never be in S19’s portion. I didn’t notice any smell when we went in. If anything, I would think S19’s side would be smelly from his athletic clothes. In any case, S19 is very happy and says he has a good group of friends. I feel badly that the roommate does not fit in with the rest of the suite. I have no idea if he prefers to be a loner or is just having a hard time finding his niche, but if it’s the latter, then I’m sure he’s feeling lonely. S19 says they would invite him to dinner but he never wanted to join them. He said the roommate never talks to him so at this point, they just don’t really talk. S19 would never request a room change - they are peacefully coexisting (aside from the smell I guess). It really could be a lot worse so he’s fine. He has another home game this weekend so we will bring him some room fresheners.
@SJ2727 so glad your D is acclimating to DC well. It really is a great city for college students (I grew up in and live in the DC suburbs). My D17 is across the country from us in CA and Sunday evenings were usually when we would talk. Being far away certainly teaches them independence, especially when living in a city. Hopefully the heat will break soon-it’s been a very long, hot and humid few months!
DD has already been asked to be the 4th person in an on-campus apartment with some upperclassmen next year. She hasn’t agreed. She knows I have in mind for her to live in a certain apartment complex that is off-campus but adjacent. She was saying how it would be nice to stay on campus though so I looked on google maps and the on-campus and off-campus apartments are right next to each other. On-campus is $630/month plus utilities, off-campus is as low as $325/month including utilities so I need to inform her she needs to try to get the off-campus. I think there’s time to figure that out and a roommate- I checked this summer and there was still availability showing.
I am also thankful she is less than 2 hours away! When she was considering some far away ones I started a thread asking about distance and travel. Some people told me it was no big deal, and they learn to handle being stuck at the airport etc. I suppose she would have survived, but it’s just nice not having to worry about travel hassles and to see her more than just the longer breaks. Plus she’s in theatre, so we can go to all of her performances easily.
Friday on her drive home she called and I got all the scoop on her new friends, her play, how she gets to record a song in a real studio for the play, what professors are awesome, playing dodgeball in rec class (“the football players here are 4x bigger than me”), and how she has her life plan & career figured out. Very upbeat call, and while I don’t know if the life plan will all work out I did approve of her ideas! So all good here, the slump she hit about 9 days in is a distant memory now
Parents weekend in Nashville was super fun. The school did a great job with planned activities and I was disappointed we couldn’t get there a day early to take advantage of some of the things going on Friday during the day. We did arrive in time to meet up with S19 Friday evening at an arts festival on campus that had food, music, performances, and fun stations for kids/families (making t-shirts, crafts, someone drawing family caricatures). S hasn’t spent much time off campus and doesn’t have a car, so he wanted us to go hunt down some body paint that he could use for the football game Saturday. We ended the evening back at the common area on his dorm floor where we had a jam session. My husband brought his guitar, S had his bass and saxophone and some other kids came out with their instruments. It was hilarious. I was very impressed with how friendly the students were. The family tailgate the next morning was really nice and included some fun activities. We enjoyed the game despite the heat and the losing.
S has made some very nice friends, has bonded well with his random roommate and has formed a group of about 10 guys from all around the country who he really enjoys. One of the best parts of the weekend was Saturday night. Six of the boys and parents went to a fun barbecue place (not the best for S19 since he’s been vegetarian since starting school) with a great rooftop and we spent several hours there. It was so nice to see the kids doing well and it was fun to get to know some of the parents. I had some good conversations with S over the weekend and he even opened up about feelings for a new girl. We had a nice brunch on Sunday before heading home and while I’m back to missing him, I’m so thankful to know that he’s in a great place with some wonderful students and teachers.
Sharing this idea because it might be fun for others, whether or not your kids are doing international relations or similar global course… we got an “IR” care package for D19 together. We started with bissli chips (Israel, from Safeway), then from world market, some British chocolates, Australian timtams, Japanese soda, South African chutney & fruit juice, and we also popped in a cute little “day of the dead” cat that we saw at target. I’m sure we could have got more (there’s plenty other countries to choose from!) but that was about what fit in the flat rate box! She loved it.
Hi everybody - it’s been quiet around here lately! Hope all of the kids are having a great year so far.
D is doing well at Tulane. Classes seem pretty good, not too demanding but not too easy. She still struggles a little with French I think. Required language was on our master spreadsheet (she was hoping to not have to take one!) but when it came down to it she loved Tulane so much that she decided it didn’t matter.
She seems to be taking advantage of being in a city by spending lots of non-meal plan money at the local restaurants. I tried to talk her into going to a Fried Chicken Festival this weekend but I don’t think she ever went. Meanwhile when S23 heard about it he was mad I didn’t take him all the way to NO for unlimited fried chicken!
They have a fall break in a few weeks which is turned into a 5 day weekend because the school combined Yom Kippur with the normal break. The original plan was to stay on campus, get to know people better, have the to explore the city more. As D talked with people she realized almost everybody she knows is heading home so now she is coming home as well. I am so excited to see her but kind of bummed more kids aren’t staying to get to know the area.
@SJ2727 Cute idea on the package! I actually bought Tim Tams to put in a care package for D but somehow managed to eat them all before I sent it.
@elena13 Sounds like a prefect weekend - I hope ours is as much fun as yours! We are bringing D’s guitar when we go. She didn’t want to bring it during move in, she wasn’t sure she would have enough room and she is shy about playing in front of friends. Once we moved in we saw there was a big spot under her bed being her storage bins where she can store the case so hopefully she will get some use out of it.
Midd’s family weekend is this coming weekend, and we decided to go. Rosh Hashana starts Sunday evening, and Midd’s Hillel extended an invitation for parents to stay for services, so we’ve decided to do so.
D19 is actually calling once or twice a week on her own (she also practices her Hebrew on me)!!
@MWolf we are very fond of bissli…not sure it’s a good or bad thing the local Safeway stocks them (usually only the barbecue ones though)
D19 is spending rosh hashana with grandparents in NYC. Then she’s coming home for a long weekend over Columbus Day, a decision we took when she realized (1) they also have the 15th off for fall break (and she has no Friday classes) (2) D26’s birthday is that weekend - so it’s a birthday surprise for her too! Can’t wait to see her, she sounds like she’s having so much fun but also misses us!
D’s family weekend isn’t until November, but she’ll be home for fall break in October. Her classes are going great and she’s fully into the crew team, but is still (impatiently) waiting on gymnastics to start- it should hopefully be next week. The dorms continue to be kinda meh. Last weekend there were dead mice on the stairs and lice found on a common room couch. Not exactly high living. Ha. She was able to pick up a second job that starts on Saturday and is excited about that.
I tried to talk her into going to a Fried Chicken Festival this weekend but I don’t think she ever went. Meanwhile when S23 heard about it he was mad I didn’t take him all the way to NO for unlimited fried chicken!