Regarding your Mom, she might never come around. She might have a number of reasons and that is fine. The decision to attend BS is a family matter and if she doesn’t support it, it might not happen.
I explored the options with my kiddo together collecting data and keeping an open mind. We kept my spouse in the loop on all aspects of the decision. We balanced all of the options and kept refining until we all made a decision. I cannot imagine a family spending 200K+ unless everyone was on board.