<p>Here is what I can tell you. I have a son who is a national merit finalist and got near perfect SAT scores. He would rather shave his head than to have people know this about him. He simply does not define himself that way, and doesnt have an arrogant or materialistic bone in his body. He owns 5 pairs of cargo pants from target, one pair of shoes and ten t shirts…he feels that is enough in this world. Long hair, the kind of kid who just sits at a table at lunch and helps other kids with tutoring etc…on his own, not to put on college app.</p>
<p>So that said, he has gravitated to the schools with a strong honor code and quaker (not our religion) atmosphere. Haverford has been a top pick simply because they do not discuss grades with each other, and it felt right to him on many levels of stewardship and such. Guilford is another. Davidson felt privledged and snooty to him. I’d suggest you look at colleges that change lives website for some that are more this way…UNC asheville is a hidden gem of this sort as well.</p>
<p>Momzie, we have a set of parents like that too…but we also assume that we will be told the child was admitted to the schools regardless of a rejection!</p>
<p>“I have a son who is a national merit finalist and got near perfect SAT scores. He would rather shave his head than to have people know this about him.”</p>
<p>I’m not certain my son could tell you his scores. If he could, it’s because he had to list them on apps. Just not on his radar, although they were very good.</p>
<p>Life, especially life today, has a way of humbling most students by the time they have to get a job, first apartment, buy a car, etc. Really tough to stay arrogant when you can barely support yourself.</p>
<p>Why make judgments off the internet? You don’t know anything about the kids you’re judging here. They could be perfectly fine in real life. </p>
<p>Personally, I make some panicked-sounding chance threads too. I even got real flack from a poster in the NYU forum for making one when I was bored. However, having a thread title with “OMG can I get into NYU???” or the like is probably more likely to get attention than “Mildly interested in seeing my chances.” It’s really easy to sound emotional on the internet when you’re really not (and vice-versa).</p>
<p>Oh, but as we all know, the children of the parents here are 100% perfect and humble.</p>
<p>Yes, that was particularly humbling–the realization that one could not console oneself regarding beautiful people by saying, “Well, she’s probably stupid.” The most beautiful woman in my class graduated summa.</p>
<p>"Oh, but as we all know, the children of the parents here are 100% perfect and humble. "</p>
<p>I like the sarcasm. What I like about CC is that so many posters come here to discuss their children, with flaws e.g. procrastination, mental health issues, clumsy social skills, poor financial judgment.</p>
<p>I have never met a 17 or 18 y.o. who didn’t experience a rejection or a personal/family crisis. Similarly, even those kids heading to “elite” schools were fearful they would struggle just to keep up. They sweated interviews for summer positions and first jobs, or admissions into grad/med/bus/law schools. Next comes the applications for grants. Maybe my community is small, but arrogant kids are not part of it. Misguided parents are part of it. I’ve met those who boast of their child getting a merit scholarship, when the school only grants $ for financial need. Others “boost” their child’s scores or acceptances. I’ve spent hours researching lists of schools that are realistic for their child, academically and financially, but parents ignore. rant over…</p>
<p>The phrase “unbridled optomism” sounds good. I wish the worm had more of this. “Humble” to a fault fits him better.</p>