<p>Factors. In health matters, there is not always one thing to point at, but a series of factors that can converge. We don’t know ultimate truths about what all of those are, what triggers a genetic tendency. What protects, what accelerates. We only know what we know. Just look at the yoyo about coffee.</p>
<p>I read half the testimony and am still waiting for the big reveal. I don’t have an opinion. Paula Deen, like Martha Stewart, is not perfect. </p>
<p>I’ve lived in the South and basically love it. I’m well aware that it is still, in many parts, in different ways, a deferential culture. That, to me, is the issue with the white-coated waiters. No matter how handsome they look, have we taken a group, put them in the costume of days when they were treated separately, relegated them to that place in time? Are we asking them to be ultra deferential, along the lines of the expectations from a few generations ago?</p>
<p>No easy answers. Whatya gonna do? Since I haven’t hit the big reveal (if there is one,) I can only go on the excerpt- and doesn’t it seem she showed some sensitivity to this?</p>
<p>ps. Wegotin, we had the big health argument on a thread a few years ago. It started heading down the inevitable path of anecdotes. I agree a moderate and health-focused diet/lifestyle is a better choice. I used to say, eat the way my grandmother did. But, the early environmental realities for her, are not what we live with today. A scary recent thread covers additives and the reach of modern technology. It’s not easy.</p>
<p>I do not preach anything to anyone. Believe me I do understand that diseases are a combination of genetics and environmental factors. Another anecdote: My mother had a heart attack at the age of 37. I know that genetics played a big factor( heart problems ran in her family) however she was also obese. Among her sisters, the ones that were overweight died young, while the ones that were active and had their weight under control developed heart problem later in life and much milder than those of their sisters.Those are still living.</p>
<p>The quote, “when you know better, you do better” is originally from the bible. I don’t know much about Paula Deen but I am sure we have all said and done things we would prefer not to recount for the record.</p>
<p>If I were a southerner I think I’d be embarrassed and/or angered by Paula Deen. Most of the South has made huge progress in moving way beyond its negative stereotypes of the past. But Paula, first with her promotion of an unhealthful, fat-drenched “Southern” diet, combined her use of the N-word, and topped off with her longing for the good ol’ days of genteel dining with black servants waiting on their white masters, she has hit a trifecta of negative stereotypes about the South. </p>
<p>All she needs to make the picture complete is an uneducated husband or brother with lots of missing teeth sitting on the front porch wearing bib overalls with no shirt.</p>
I feel like this is going into the territory of being “colorblind.” I understand that we need to stop discrimination. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t acknowledge that different people from different backgrounds (which often is in accordance with ethnicity and race) are different.
The most important aspect of this discussion seems to be what the n word really means, and the conflict seems to be that it means different things to different people, like with most “bad words”. It’s offensive to some, but just another word to others.
When a black person uses the n word it doesn’t mean the same thing as when a white person uses it. If a black person uses the word, it’s assumed that they are not insulting or looking down on anyone. However, if someone of another race uses the word, they become suspect, because it is much more likely that they mean it in a derogatory way and do look down on black people.</p>
<p>As for Paula Deen, I remember in one episode where she had a guest star (I think it was a British model who was talking about healthy eating), she addressed the Southern stereotype of healthy eating. She said that some people watch her show and think that she and other Southerners eat like that everyday when they don’t. While I wouldn’t even eat many of hose dishes occasionally, I think the point of her show is to show classic Southern food, not daily Southern food.</p>
<p>I would point to the use of the b-word to refer to women collectively. I would agree that it is much more obviously negative when used by males. But I think it is also extremely demeaning when used by women to refer to other women. I think that the n-word is similarly demeaning when used by black people. Both are examples of vulgarity that demeans both the user and the object.</p>
<p>These words pack a lesser punch with the current generation than it used to. Profanity is so common. When these words are used in a friendly way it is not taken to heart. I’m not saying these words are demeaning or hurtful because they can be given the context, but with this generation the filter just isn’t there.</p>
<p>Girls call each other b*<strong><em>es, guys call each other d</em></strong>s and a-holes, black people call each other the “n word”. It’s so common now.</p>
<p>I’ve seen a lot of complaints of racism/sexism/heterosexism from current college students when these words are used. I don’t buy the idea that it is not a big deal.</p>
<p>No, Niquii is correct. It is the majority who use these words indifferently. I only wanted to point out that there are some that do have a filter. We do exist, but we are the minority. The ones who raise complaints about it are an even smaller minority.</p>
<p>Her contract will not be renewed. She is gone after 11 years. Not because of this, but that network is free-falling with poor show upon poor show. Many are worse than Paula … The Neelys, that fake Irvine, and silly rigged competitions. </p>
<p>The words don’t pack an easier punch with my girls. They can’t even tolerate it in a broad discussion of history. </p>
<p>The fact that many use a word- and that they fall into the same id group it targets- doesn’t make it ok. The different people from different backgrounds argument could be used to allow Bubba to say what he will. </p>
<p>Sometimes, you want to look at the source and ask if they are making positives or falling into old patterns they don’t recognize. I think some are attracted the conflict itself, as if it is some bonding protest. Huh? Like, one overweight person greets another, “Hey, Fatso!” ?</p>
<p>Foodtv once announced they wouldn’t renew Irvine, for issues on his resume- and they did.</p>
<p>If they are running out of stars, I’ll fill the gap. Butter only when needed.</p>
<p>I have very mixed feelings about forbidden words. While I realize that many words are offensive–from saying OMG to rhymes-with-witch to the “n-word” to the “c-word”—I think the simple act of forbidding them gives them enormous power to offend. </p>
<p>If, instead of saying “you can’t say that”, we said and thought “are you from the distant past?” many of these words would lose their power and become boring instead. And I, for one, would be deeply relieved to find them going the way of the corded telephone.</p>
I never said I loved that idea either, but it is different because they are guests in her home. It’s not as if she’s telling people on the street that they need to stop. Her house, her rules, whatever the rationale.</p>
<p>My own thoughts on a few points raised here, in no particular order -</p>
<p>While I’ve never cared for Deen, I post in this thread due to my irritation and frustration over seeing far too many people assume (not here, but in comments on many sites) that her attitudes and words are typical of Southerners, and particularly of older, white Southerners.</p>
<p>As for speech that offends me, I reserve the right to set the standards of behavior within my own home. If my children had guests who used offensive language in my home, they’d be asked to stop. If they refused, they would have been told to leave. FWIW, my kids would have handled it before I could have said anything. </p>
<p>My kids attended college in the South and a sibling teaches at a Southern college. None have heard offensive language on a regular basis and none of my kids’ friends talk that way. They consider it rude and trashy. </p>
<p>I did have a contractor make racist remarks to me once and I fired him. His hateful words cost him about $20K in business.</p>
<p>I read some of the allegations, and one thing I haven’t noticed being discussed is how Deen’s brother was said to have taken large sums of cash from the restaurant he co-owned on a regular basis. I wonder if the IRS will look into that? </p>
<p>Aside from the racial slur, Deen and her brother seemed to use crude language quite a bit, and in a way meant to demean employees. She also seemed to see nothing wrong with him viewing porn at work in front of employees. Between that and the assault allegations, there seems to be plenty on which to base a case for a hostile workplace. </p>
<p>I must admit that I am puzzled about why the former employee remained with the PD “family” for so long.</p>