<p>I think this essay is an 8-9 out of 12.
You have a clear point and pretty good examples, but the writing seems like you’re just following a formula. There’s nothing special to draw the reader in. Also, the introduction and conclusion are very minimal.
You’re almost there 
-just add some detail and interesting writing strategies (figurative language etc). </p>
<p>Please help me grade my essay too, if you can @ <a href=“Help me grade my SAT essay... please? :) - SAT Preparation - College Confidential Forums”>Help me grade my SAT essay... please? :) - SAT Preparation - College Confidential Forums; ;)</p>