<p>Completely agree, Consolation. What a waste of public funds. </p>
<p>So, so agree with you consolation. And atomom I totally think you are right to make your own decisions… It’s ridiculous to think that so many personal family decisions have to be a one size fits all.</p>
<p>Those of you who are reciting the various ways your kids are allowed to be independent: Have you ever left, would you ever leave, a 9 year old completely unsupervised at a public park for five hours? I doubt it, and if it’s not a appropriate care for your kid, it’s not appropriate care for anyone else’s kid. As for the purported “waste” of resources, if the publicity resulting from this incident saves even one other child from similar neglect or, ideally, convinces the city of North Augusta to publicize, if available, or establish, if not available, summer alternatives for the kids poor working parents, then it’s been a great use of public funds. When it comes to the health and safety of a child, I’m happy to open my pockets. And it looks like Ms. Harrell has come out in a better position than before this all started, given the $40K in donations that have come her way. </p>
<p>No, I haven’t left my 9 yr old alone in a park. But I was threatened with arrest by a policeman for leaving him alone reading a book in a locked car–no heat issues-- for 15 minutes.</p>
<p>“a 9 year old completely unsupervised at a public park for five hours? I doubt it.”</p>
<p>I used to drop my kid off at our town park all the time when he was that age. I would give him some money for lunch and snacks. Then he would call me to pick him up when he wanted to come home. Now, it’s a park that only residents of my town can use - but I don’t see how that should make a difference. Lots of parents in my town drop the kids off. </p>
<p>I also let him ride his bike to school a mile when he was only 6 and he was allowed to ride pretty much all over town when he was 8 or so. </p>
<p>Nobody has mentioned the issue with the Mc Donald’s job. I know a teen who works at Mc Donald’s. Her mother was ill and recently was hospitalized. The girl chose to stay with her sick mom. She tells me that even with a doctor’s note, Mc Donald’s writes this up as missed work for any reason- and there are only so many write ups you can get before you lose the job. I don’t know if this applies to a supervisor, but she needs to be at work regardless.</p>
<p>This mom is between a rock and a hard place. She needs the job to support her child, but in order to keep the job, she may be choosing the only resource she has. If the park is well attended by other families, then she is taking a leap of faith that most of us hope to never have to.</p>
<p>In our area there are community centers and churches that provide low cost or subsidized day activities. I think the public schools do this as well. I hope there are resources like this available for parents.</p>
<p>No I would not leave a 9 year old in a park for 5 hours, but I understand that someone else might need to in order to make a living, and I don’t think it is criminal to do so. This mother seems to have worked hard to turn her life around. I definitely had the run of town when I was 9 years old, certainly for stretches of 5 hours, and my parents did not know where I was at any given time. I think that independence served me well in life. There are always risks. If we really want to minimize the risk of harm for kids we wouldn’t let them drive til they are 21, and learning to swim well would be mandatory. I can’t get very excited about a happy 9 year old playing at the park all day.</p>
<p>Everyone has to figure out child care. I don’t know why she couldn’t just leave the girl at home with a movie, though. Also, it’s either illegal or it isn’t. Bad judgement is not necessarily illegal. </p>
<p>Count me in on your idea, Consolation.</p>
<p>As for to the benefits Ms. Harrell might receive from spillings from an allegorical Horn of Plenty of prosecutorial largess…yes, I am certain that the lesson in public humiliation has been beneficial for she, her clearly bright child, and the many other parents in North Augusta, SC. NOT!!!</p>
<p>Several years ago a writer in NYC let her 9 yo take the subway home alone. She writes a blog called “Free Range Kids”, and got a book deal, I believe. Though some chastised her for being a neglectful parent, she was also celebrated. The difference here is that THIS mother is a low-income minority with a past drug problem. Hmm. Double-standard anyone?</p>
<p>I grew up when it was normal to leave your house in the morning and come home for dinner, with no means of contacting your parents, or for them to find you. At 9 I was walking/riding bikes all over the place for hours at a home. I was in charge of walking my younger siblings to and from school. My brother walked alone to kindergarten at 6 to another school a mile away because that’s what people did back them. We’ve all bought into the paranoia. Kids have been abducted from their own homes with their parents in the next room, with other kids IN the room. There is no place that is 100% safe. </p>
<p>Count me in as someone who would never allow my kid to hang out at a park by herself for 5 hours when she is 9. At age 13 (and older), I told my kid not to go to bathroom by herself, I told her to always go with a friend. In college, I told my kids not to go to parties by themselves, always have a buddy. I am kind of surprised that so many people on CC think it is ok to let a 9 year old hang out at the park for 5 hours. Did the kid have drinks, food? What about going to the bathroom? What if the kid got hurt, who was responsible? Another parent at the park?</p>
<p>Although I don’t agree with this mother being handcuffed and arrested, it is clearly irresponsible to have a nine year old child left in a park unsupervised for five hours or more. Allowing children to ride bikes around your community or to walk home from school alone are different in that it isn’t a five hour period of time in which no one has knowledge of where the child may be.</p>
<p>Much of what a parent considers safe is based on his/her life experience. I was raised in the country and did all kinds of things by myself – on our property. My parents, 30-40 years ago, would never have dreamed of letting us have that same freedom in a town. However, they considered farms, with their ponds and livestock, much more safe than more populated areas. </p>
<p>Where my family lives now is regarded as a very safe area. However, twice, within a quarter mile of my house, strangers have attempted to abduct children, ages 10-12 or so, from their own front yards. You can bet that I have been very protective of my own children when it comes to their physical safety. However, they are growing up, going off to college, and becoming independent without suffering any ill consequences of that protection.</p>
<p>I think leaving a 9-year-old to fend for herself in a park for hours is terrible – irresponsible and negligent. However, desperate people often take desperate measures, and the mother was apparently in an awful bind. She was trying to figure out how to work with no child care options and she was probably afraid to leave her daughter at home alone in her neighborhood. She needs help, not punishment.</p>
<p>Oldfort, I think the news report indicated that the park was full of children and some organization provided lunch/snacks. A few years ago on a beautiful summer day, I left the office early so Lake Jr. and I could enjoy some time at a nearby beach. As we made our way past the picnic benches an adult worker from a summer program for children offered Lake Jr. and I box lunches, because there was more food than there were children. I get the impression that there was a similar program at the park where Ms. Harrell left her daughter.</p>
<p>It’s been a few years, but the parks in Seattle used to have a similar program. You didn’t have to sign up, just wander on down, do an activity or not, and get a free lunch. The lunches were part of the Dept. of Agriculture summer feeding program for kids (which still exists, my job is a site for dispensing them). My older D and son occasionally walked down to the park near our former home to participate. </p>
<p>When I was a kid, we were even LESS “trackable” than sitting in a park for 5 hours. We were biking/walking to no pre-chosen spot, with no check-in time, and no set time to be home. One difference, though, was that our “neighborhood” extended many, many blocks and people tended to know each other at least a little, and they certainly were willing to get involved if there was a problem. My sister, a friend and I went on a 10-mile or so bike excursion one day and got tired and hot so we stopped to regroup. A family friend came by and offered to load all the bikes in the car and drive us home. That’s how things went back then. Now the poor guy would probably need to be fingerprinted before it was allowed.</p>
<p>My mother grew up in NYC so maybe she thought that a small city in NH was completely safe for us to do what we did. But if I’m remembering correctly, it was the norm. </p>
<p>Another article I read about this case said the girl had a cell phone so she coud call her mom if she needed anything. If that was the case the mom was quite possibly checking in with her as well. </p>
<p>I disagree about telling her not to talk to strangers. That’s flawed advice in general IMO. And the person who called the cops probably would have called them anyway. I mean, if you were concerned that a kid was in danger (which it doesn’t sound like this girl was but obviously the person who called was concerned) and you asked them a question, would you be reassured and decide they were OK if they didn’t respond?</p>
<p>The linked story notes that the people who brought lunch everyday had seen her there before and didn’t think there was any need to call police.</p>
<p>Actually yes MamaJ my kids were “allowed” to go to the local park on their own - probably at age 10 but probably not for 5 hours but an afternoon 2-3 hours yes… we’d set a time to be home and that was the beginning of learning how to come home on time, and keeping persona responsibility for time…if the kids are late, it doesn’t happen for a long time until we think they are ready to be personally responsible. I dropped off many 9 and 10 year olds foursome’s mid-day at the little local 9 hole golf course and picked them up a couple hours later. Again this decision will vary depending on the town or the neighborhood. I think 5 hours is pushing it personally for a 9 year old - that’s almost too much time at that age, but short periods of time, yes, if you discover that the kiddo is responsible about whatever “rules” you put in place. If you’ve got a kid who doesn’t listen and has air between the ears and makes bad decisions, you probably wouldn’t leave them alone at all. And if you do give them some free space you have to be willing to lay down the law if they are disobedient. Sometimes parenting is easier to never give them an opportunity to fail or better year give them an opportunity to be successful, because then you never have to lay down the law. </p>
<p>Okay, so this mother was arrest and charged with FELONY CHILD NEGLECT not for leaving her child in a park for hours on end. She was arrested for allowing her son to walk to the park by himself.</p>
<p><a href=“http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/mom-arrested-letting-son-park-24777001”>http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/mom-arrested-letting-son-park-24777001</a></p>
<p>Now, we can argue about whether it is wise to allow a child to walk to a park unsupervised, and at what age it becomes “okay,” but we will all have different opinions about that. What I didn’t realize was that the law doesn’t allow a parent to make that determination at all.</p>
<p>Well, it’s not against the law to let your kid walk to school or to the park or wherever alone. Child neglect is the charge and that’s a pretty broad category. It is scary. imho.</p>
<p>“Actually yes MamaJ my kids were “allowed” to go to the local park on their own - probably at age 10 but probably not for 5 hours but an afternoon 2-3 hours yes”</p>
<p>Me too. I could bike or walk to the park and stay there for the afternoon, bring a picnic I’d packed myself, etc. And I lived in an urban neighborhood, and there were no cell phones. Many parks have bathrooms. I was riding the bus alone at 10. I could have gotten home unless I broke my leg or something – and a broken leg can happen when you’re a teenager, too.</p>
<p>I was also taught to use my judgment about people. Of course, I knew not to get into someone’s car, but the fact is that a mom at a park with her kids is an extremely safe person to talk to. I fell and skinned my knee in Chicago a couple of years ago, and a mom with a stroller came running up to offer me all kinds of help: baby wipes, water, band-aids, etc. A 9-year-old who’s not an idiot can tell that accepting this help does not put her in danger. The playground equipment is dozens of times more likely to cause serious injury than an unknown mom with kids.</p>