$17K gap for ST B. Kid will have to work and make about $7K, parents have to come up with about $7k and then borrow via PLUS or if turned down for that extended Direct loans. It’s doable if the merit money holds. Tight but doable. Will likely get ACOA credit in taxes which will help. That’s what the kid wants and if she understands what it’s going to take, she’ll likely have more momentum in effort to make it work. Having a “horse fighting the line” is not a good situation to have.
The OP is likely to lose the Excelsior in years 2 and 3 AND have an additional child in college. And the student can lose SUNY scholarships too (mine did!) These things do happen.
A lucky thing about being a New Yorker is that the SUNY system is extensive enough that there are state schools local to just about anywhere in the state. Your kid screws up, she can come home, get a job, go back to school at affordable tuition costs, commuting. One of mine did that too! Had a shot at his first choice school, finished at local SUNY.