Many/most PhD grad school programs are funded (even at the Ivies) but at the undergrad level the Ivies do not offer any merit-based scholarships. So your husband’s experience as a grad student is irrelevant to your child’s undergraduate situation.
The ivies (and a few other colleges) do offer very generous need-based aid , depending on their assessment of your family’s financial situation. They determine this based on your filling out the FAFSA and CSS profile forms. You can get an estimate of what your need based aid will be at each college by going to each college’s net price calculator web page. Each college does this differently so you need to check each one individually.
Lots of schools offer merit awards that do not look at your financial situation, but that is not true of the Ivies, Stanford, MIT, or other colleges that already attract more highly-qualified students than they can accept. The schools that offer merit are doing so to attract kids with higher academic grades and scores who might not otherwise apply to that college. The ivies don’t have that need.