<p>We’ve seen anecdotal examples on this thread of other schools in Mississippi segregating prom by race and nobody has given an example of a northern schol doing the same thing. I do agree that zoosermom’s school is doing something pretty problematic as well, and I’m not justifying it, but it’s not as overt. I can’t picture a school around here (and I did not grow up in a diverse town but I live in a very diverse city now) just segregating their prom and imagining that it was something that would be accepted.</p>
<p>Like I said, I’m really not trying to put down the whole south and there are a lot of great things there and I am absolutely not making any blanket statements about individuals, but there’s a somewhat different and complicated history of racial issues in a lot of the south.</p>
<p>In HI, we have many races and many kids are offices ethnicities. Have not heard of any racially segregated proms. </p>
<p>We have had country clubs and subdivisions which had covenants to exclude Asians. Fortunately they have been invalidated and were not enforced at least for the last 40+ years. There was a lawsuit trying to require the Hawaiian private school to offer admissions to non-Hawaiians. It went up on appeal and was settled by the school payinng out (out of court) before being considered by the US Supreme Court. </p>
<p>Sorry for the side note–back to segregated proms.</p>
<p>As many here know, I was dj years ago.
I made my “sales pitch” at a school in Columbus Ohio, and though they liked me, they told me to be hired, I must provide a black and a white dj. Their fear was that only 1 dj would play music that appealed to only 1 race. Their school, they said, was approx 50-50 b/w of those that attended dances. A disproportionate number of blacks, compared to U.S. pop.
They told me they had had race-based fights in their past when only 1 dj played 1 kind of music.</p>
<p>it does hurt people and it perpetuaites the whole apartheid history of the south. how can it not hurt? its horrid, no reason for it, regardless of musical tastes, and disgusting on it very face</p>
<p>oh, im a private restaruant and I dont have to serve black people? is that okay?<br>
what i love is the south flying the confedirate flag and calling themselves americans and patriotic, what a joke</p>
<p>The northeast is the whitest part of the united states, actually, according to the US census. It’s completely shocking how few minorities live there, compared to the rest of the country. There are interesting graphics on this in the census.</p>
<p>We have a long, long way to go on race in this country, in every part of the country, for various and differing reasons. A segregated prom is a true horror. A white suburb is horrific and rarely discussed. There are not that many people of color in Danbury Connecticut. Or Winnetka, Illinois. Or Shorthills, NJ. these proms are segregated, too.</p>
<p>I am still stuck on “Asians can’t drive.” People have told me to watch out for Asian man wearing baseball cap, driving a mini van. To prove their point, it has been entertaining for me to look for such driver whenever I am on the road. The closest I have found is my dad - Asian man, wearing a baseball cap , driving a SUV. He is a horrible driver because of his age and eyesight.</p>
<p>I have to say that this is surprising to me - it would never be allowed in my city. The parent groups at our high schools try to make these events affordable for everyone. We also offer scholarships when needed.</p>
<p>oldfort - You should also watch out for the woman with white hair in the big silver Buick. :eek: It’s my mom.</p>
<p>I want to clarify something: no public school can have segregated proms in the United States. That’s not what we’re talking about. These are privately-organized proms held off of school property. It’s not clear to me that schools could prohibit these, even if they wanted to. I do think it’s cowardly not to organize an integrated prom at the school (and it sounds like the school in the article is doing this).</p>
<p>And lest those of us in other parts of the country get too self-righteous about this, just how integrated are private parties held by high school students?</p>
<p>Hunt, I guess I’m spoiled because in most areas I’ve lived in, they’ve been very integrated. I guess lower SES neighborhoods have more integrated parties than ones where it’s $300 for a prom ticket (I still cannot get over that highway robbery figure).</p>
<p>Romani, in new York things usually cost twice as much as they do elsewhere from what I’ve seen. (except areas in ca, and the dc area in VA and md)You can pay two plus grand a month for a one bedroom apartment. I’m honestly not surprised by what they charge for prom up there.</p>
<p>I’m sure their prices to rent whatever place they are trying to have their prom is astronomical. Of course, if they lowered the price more people would want to go and then they’d need a bigger place… Costing more money. It’s like a never ending circle of economics.</p>
<p>That being said, we had fundraisers to earn money to help off set the price of prom. I’m wondering if they do this as well.</p>
<p>Yeah it’s quite nuts… I had a friend with a studio apartment that is smaller then my bedroom who paid 1600 a month for it.</p>
<p>I used to vacation to the obx with a bunch of my friends. We used to laugh and call our traveling van the minority mobile because we had a mix of caucasian, African American, Indian, and Asian people in our group. The caucasians were the minority in our traveling group… Every time we went into a restaurant or bar, wet had the only non caucasian guests in the place. I remember one place had an African American employee and he thanked us profusely for coming there. </p>
<p>Nobody ever said anything negative or started any fights but I do think we turned a few heads.</p>
<p>It’s a shame that proms are still being divided. :(</p>
<p>poetgrl- I think there is a difference between mandated all-white proms, and de facto ones. The towns you mention might be mostly white, but not entirely so, and a student wouldn’t be barred from bringing a date of a different race.</p>
<p>And of course they don’t represent the NE–Millburn is far richer than most towns in NJ. My town is completely integrated. I’m sorry that people choose to live in areas that are less so, but there are plenty of towns that are.</p>
<p>I don’t claim that the north is in any way blameless or devoid of racism, far from it, but at least my neck of the woods is so used to casual, accepted integration, that to choose segregation, and publicly so, is startling to me, even as I know it exists.</p>
<p>DH’s high school had it’s first racially integrated reunion 10 years ago. But even after that, the segregated re unions continue. In this case, a number of AA alums choose to have a reunion that is invitation only. Those invited are the AA members of that class and their dates. The “official” reunion invites ALL members of that class. </p>
<p>I want to add that at some of the schools here, that are very much integrated, though the prom itself was integrated, the groupings of kids were not. Some of the limos were called 'the soul trains" because all of the students in there were AA. Just like at certain integrated schools, when one watches who sits with whom and hangs out with whomever, there is a distinct segregation by color.</p>
<p>Not much one can do when it’s a private party or its all by choice. </p>
<p>Also, there are proms with different themes, in some areas, I’ve read, where families want a more conservative prom without the risque outfits and dances. I don’t how the invitations work for those. Not race divided, but something divided.</p>
<p>garland, all I am saying is that Chicago is the most segregated, by race, by SES, cities in the country, factually. But, talk to someone in Lake Forest and she will express horror at the very idea of a segregated prom.</p>
<p>I am deeply saddened by the segregated prom in this article. I am very alarmed by the segregation that exists in the North where we believe we are not racist.</p>
<p>I think it is just more insidious and we are just more self-congratulatory on the issue. “Look at those horrible racist southerners” say the women playing tennis in the all white club. That’s all.</p>
<p>We need to do a lot of work on race everywhere. The prom, absolutely! the entire towns? Even moreso.</p>
<p>My daughter goes to a gigantic selective (citywide test) high school that’s approx. 60 percent Asian (mostly Chinese but a substantial number of South Asian kids), 20 percent white, 20 percent black and Latino. There is a prom for everyone but three different after-prom parties. I heard that the Asian party is the hottest. Sure, kids group themselves by ethnicity but they mix a lot too.</p>