<p>yes sseamom… you are so right. I agree with you 100%. I think some posters aren’t realizing the whole picture. But… this was originally about a yearbook picture with a teen mom and her baby. Most people aren’t denying her an education, or condemning her to hell. Like I stated ^^, I think it’s fear of contagion, that somehow this pic will appear appealing to some other teens, maybe their own.</p>
<p>For me, it’s the knowledge that this young woman made a decision most likely to lead her and her child down the road of poverty and dependence. I wish her and her child the best, but I cannot support her decision. I can’t think of a reason why I should.</p>
<p>How is staying in school a decision that will lead her and her child down the road of poverty and dependance?</p>
<p>Jumpinbeans,
I’m talking about her decision to become a teen mom.</p>
<p>Bay - I hear ya. It’s frustrating to be an adult and know how hard life is and then see kids having kids. It almost makes you want to scream at how stupid they are. Kids are kids, and they know everything, right? But we don’t know all the circumstances. Is her family wealthy or more well-off? Does she have a huge circle of support? Maybe. We don’t know. Is the boy (father) sticking around? Is HIS family? You could be right. This girl and her baby could live in poverty and on food stamps for the next 18 yrs., and the cycle could start again. We don’t know.</p>
<p>Bay are you questioning the choice to get pregnant or the choice to keep the baby?</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I believe there is a lot of research out there on why it is so hard for some kids to graduate high school.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Well, you could TRY to understand why. I find it interesting that you are so ready to share your opinion on something you admit you don’t understand.</p>
<p>Sseamom, just stop the pontification, please.</p>
<p>You’ve characterized people’s concern about the difficulties faced by teen age mothers as condemnation. That horse was beaten and left town ages ago. It’s not that teen pregnancy should again become a stigma. The point is that more often than not, it’s a bad choice. But life being what it is, it’s a bad choice that can be overcome and made better for both parent and child.</p>
<p>Yes, Lake. You are completely right, about everything you said. I agree. But there HAVE been posters who DO think that teen mos SHOULD be shunned, kicked out of school, etc. I just can’t see any benefit-at all-to that. I’m sorry to read that even in this day, some parents would leave a pregnant daughter to fend for herself. It does no one any good, and leads to even more challenge for the girl AND her baby.</p>
<p>My D’s church, which is pretty conservative, runs a shelter for pregnant teens who were kicked out of their homes. They don’t judge. They help them find housing, counseling, etc. And everyone is better off. That’s all I’d like to see. Sometimes helping OUT is also helping UP.</p>
<p>I don’t think that saying that getting pregnant in high school is a bad idea is stigmatizing. I do think that censoring images of children because of the circumstances of their conception is stigmatizing.</p>
<p>^^Yes well, eyes wide open…things aren’t the same for a high school student when she decides to keep and have a baby. Legally in this country that is her decision and her decision alone at this point in time. I don’t recall anyone on this thread saying the girl should be kicked out, that the girl should be shunned. If she were shunned she probably wouldn’t even be getting a diploma, she’d be trying to figure out if she could possibly get a GED. If i missed a post where someone thought she should be kicked out of school, please shoot the post number out - i do recall a poster talking about what her father would think/do, etc., but no poster claiming those thoughts. I do think that along with the decision to have a baby should come the realization that things will be different. Some things not the way you envision regardless of your age, but perhaps that is difficult for teenagers to understand.</p>
<p>this was her reality, and it wasn’t like the students didn’t know she had a baby, so eh, in year book for this weird “what’s important to me portrait” is not like its a sudden revelation</p>
<p>just to me, the whole idea of the something special is stupid</p>
<p>If a girl is pregnant at my Ds high school, they are required to finish their education at a vocational school nearby. The school will not permit any pregnant girls to attend because they don’t want a ‘reputation’.</p>
<p>^ I hope they hold boys to the same standard.</p>
<p>@lima, it’s easy to hold boys to the same standard because you’ll never find a pregnant boy</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>And why would you do that?..Ultimately the woman still has control over her body regardless of what the man wants until the laws change. That’s a powerful position to be in. A man could say I don’t want you to have this baby and a woman in this day and age can say “too bad, I’m having the baby.” Clearly I’m a woman and clearly I “get” that power shift. You can’t hold both parties equally accountable because one has far more power over the outcome. You can’t have it both ways.</p>
<p>^ and that is the risk a guy takes when he has sex. Why would any laws be changed?</p>
<p>Here’s one factor on “the law”: while theoretically, “it takes 2 to tango”, in that sense, yes, the boy(or man) can take the risk of an accidental pregnancy if he chooses to have sex. Some will say- “they both took the risk…”. HOWEVER, only the female can choose to keep the baby, adopt out the baby, or abort the baby. So while both have a choice to have sex, only the girl gets to choose what to do if a pregnancy occurs.</p>
<p>As for this case, as I understand it, is the school’s position that the senior pic welcomed the student to add an achievement. I think very few here would consider an unwed teen pregnancy an achievement. In fact, given the unwed birth rate, some might feel not getting pregnant is an achievement. Graduating despite the difficulty(as previous posters have mentioned) would be an achievement, but then, it is the graduating that is the achievement not the child. With that reasoning, a diploma might also be in the pic.</p>
<p>
[quote]
If a girl is pregnant at my Ds high school, they are required to finish their education at a vocational school nearby.{/quote]</p>
<p>You said that the boy should also be sent to the vocational school. I’m asking why you would say that.The reason this school district sends pregnant high schoolers to a different school is because they do not want pregnant girls in the public high school. I’m asking why you would think that the boys should go. One,they aren’t pregnant and two they do not make the decision regarding keeping the baby or not. If the girl terminates a pregnancy she does not go to the vocational school (because she isn’t pregnant). I would assume that the girl knows if she decides to keep the pregnancy she will need to go to the other school until the baby is born. In no way am I saying I agree with this high school, but your comment about sending the boy makes no logical sense. It’s not even reasonably reinforceable because the girl could conceivably not want the father known (assuming the “father” is a teen boy) and paternity might not be able to be established. Not sure what you aren’t understanding…</p>
<p>^ I guess I’m not understanding why the girl must be sent to finish up at a vocational school. Pregnancy is not a disease and not something that prevents a student from learning. Are pregnant teachers also transferred to the vocational school?</p>