Seeking Companions for the Vigil

Parent Cafe
1961

<p>Hi vigilers. Hope you don’t mind me stopping by to introduce myself.</p>

<p>I’ve been lurking here for a long time, too, enjoying your fun conversations and giving lingering longing looks at Owlice’s delicious offerings. (I promise I did not indulge in secret!) I had thought I’d join in the musings, but to our amazement, we did not end up having a long decision vigil (but I truly expected we would–even reserving a week with my family in advance to have a quiet nervous breakdown). It turned out S1 was accepted in January (although we hadn’t been aware of the existence of early letters) to the school with a special major he had most wanted, they offered great $, and what do you know–there we were! It’s now 3 months later and I’m still stunned. So no breakdown for me, and really almost a slight letdown at the sudden lack of drama. LOL. We’re not used to being the “lucky” ones, but I am sooo grateful that S1 has this amazing opportunity. </p>

<p>As a comment on those folks out there who have odd reactions to our kid’s school, I’ve had some experience with this. S1 and S2 both went to a private middle school that is tiny and new and virtually unknown even in our city of school-savvy parents. When people asked me where they went–I stopped saying the name, which always evoked: “Where’s that?” Instead, I would just say “Its a small school” and tell them where it was located. For high school, the boys attend the most prominent school in the city, and saying the name in our area is like dropping the H bomb. Makes me so uncomfortable because I know people always react BIG. And so I think the very question: “where is you S going to school?” is loaded for me. Does it seem that everyone is ready to stand in judgment? Having tasted the unknown school and the too-well-known school, I can’t say either one made me feel the questioner could really know how special we found both of these schools which were perfect for my kids.</p>

<p>Thanks for letting me say hello. I promise not to eat anything!</p>

1962

<p>Two reactions among the neighbors: 1) How could he turn down a full ride at the state flagship (which is getting reachier by the minute); and 2) If he’s going to turn down the full ride at the flagship, why the hell didn’t he accept MIT? </p>

<p>Oh well. Among DH’s colleagues, many of whom work in the financial industry, there is much approval. The college parents at our synagogue get it. DS’s teachers are thrilled. It’s not a typical destination for kids from his school, but it is SO appropriate for him. My mom lived in Chicago for a number of years when she was young, so she really gets it (and that is the ONLY school she “got”).</p>

<p>Madbean, Share our virtual calories! Please!</p>

1963

<p>Je nes sai quois: It’s rare here in Orygone that we don’t have to explain that Colgate is not a toothpaste factory.</p>

<p>Twinmom: “Trust me, I was there.” I am still chuckling!!! Thank you for that!</p>

1964

<p>Oh, yes, we get the blank stares here about Grinnell, which I believe is one of the best schools in the country, as I also believe is true about Smith. I try to remind myself that I hadn’t heard of Pomona until we started the college search. I knew very little about most schools until then and I am still learning and will keep learning. Most people (gasp!) just aren’t that interested. What in the world is wrong with them I certainly don’t know, but this is why we hang around on CC. Eat up, madbean!</p>

1965

<p>Hullo,</p>

<p>The dumb twin questions bring me out of the dimly lit cave I have been lurking in… promise I haven’t been snatching any of Owlice’s goodies. Can I have some of that carrot cake from a while back??</p>

<p>In the supermarket
Stranger: Are they twins?
Me: Yes
Stranger: I was too. My twin died when I was three years old.
Me: //Awkward silence//</p>

<p>And now that they are 12 and VERY different (same gender, tho!).
Me: Fill out forms with same birthdate, grade, etc…
Receptionist at Doctor’s office or school: They’re twins???
Me: Yes.
Stranger: Are you sure???
Me: Uh, yeah. Pretty sure I remember birthing two. Definitely sure I remember bringing two home from the hospital.</p>

<p>And I think I might win the prize for bittiest babies at term. DS was 6 lbs 6 oz. DD TwinA was 4 and 3/4 lbs, TwinB a whopping 4 and 1/4 lbs.</p>

<p>I now return to lurking and plotting for DS’s senior year…</p>

1966

<p>crm86, Methinks you will not last long in the cave.</p>

1967

<p>Hi everyone! Back from work and a coffee klatch IRL at local Starbucks.</p>

<p>radimom: Most of us feel this way. S was accepted at two top ten unis, one a plane ride a way and chose a top LAC four hours away by car. I wouldn’t have made this decision I don’t think, but it was absolutely right for him. I learned things about him I hadn’t known by supporting his choice.</p>

<p>D chose a school in NYC and we live on Long Island, albeit two hours away. She loves NYC; it’s her favorite thing in the world a la Carrie Bradshaw “dating the city”. It certainly was NOT new territory but plenty adventurous! in the end. And her junior year abroad time is in London, not very different. But she’s having a wonderful time becoming herself.</p>

<p>Some adventures are geographic; some are social; some are spiritual and inward, and some are intellectual. They’re all good.</p>

<p>jnsq: Just stare blankly back and say, “Oh! I thought everyone had heard of Smith. Well, that’s part of the cache.”</p>

<p>At least they don’t say, “You want to go just because you couldn’t get into Columbia.” Grrr.</p>

<p>Don’t worry moms. It becomes less important. This is the time when you will feel the most about it; then not so much.</p>

<p>Hm. There was a time I hadn’t heard of Williams. It’s part of the cache. LOL. I always knew Barnard. Go figure.</p>

<p>Oh, and now a celebration like Jewish people have. Chinese food! potato pancakes and cheesecake. Heartburn, grease, sodium. What more could you want.</p>

<p>I have thoughtfully avoided all peanuts in case anyone has a problem.</p>

<p>Crystal prawns, chicken and honeyed walnuts and Peking duck. Enjoy!</p>

1968

<p>One of my favorites:</p>

<p>“Oh are they twins?”
“No they were born three weeks apart”
Puzzled look, “Is that possible?”</p>

<p>My babysitter liked messing with people. :)</p>

<p>I don’t know why people assume that two boys in a double stroller must be brothers.</p>

1969

<p>If we’re partying like it’s 1982 you can have our Prufrock Punch. Two liters of club soda, two liters of ginger ale, a large can of lemon concentrate, 1 small can of lime concentrate, as much vodka as desired (we always wanted a lot), and some chunks of dry ice so it smokes.</p>

1970

<p>My brother and I are 10 months apart - whew - born different years. Mom came back pregnant after maternity leave. :eek:</p>

1971

<p>Nice to meet so many newcomers-- welcome, welcome! Stay for a cup of coffee, a piece of cake, a drink, whatever you like.</p>

<p>Historymom-- I laughed so hard at your Siamese twins story!</p>

<p>I have two adopted sons and people still insist on calling my birth son my “real” son. Which would make the other two…what? Imaginary?</p>

<p>If ignorance is bliss, there are an awful lot of incredibly happy people out there!</p>

1972

<p>oh mythmom pass the prawns to this end of the table—now I’m sorry I ate all that carrot cake–oh well life is unpredictable so dessert before (and after) never hurt</p>

<p>jnsq–I have had a couple of those blank stares to my s college–wash and lee–but it usually is from the provincial types who won’t send their kids anywhere but a state u in florida–I simply acknowledge that I didn’t know much about w&l myself and then share accordingly–unless they’ve glazed over completely. when they hear that private colleges give scholarships they sometimes perk up but only to be ****ed off that their child didn’t have the sense to apply there–(forget the fact that they advised the child “no way” will you go out of state) that’s wjy I’m so happy to connect with so many other devoted parents s with open minds</p>

1973

<p>Oooh, forgot one…</p>

<p>Stranger: Are they twins?
Me: //Glancing at the stroller with very small babies in matching outfits// No, we borrow the neighbor’s baby to keep little Susie company while we shop.</p>

<p>The cave was actually my son’s idea. He doesn’t like it to get around that he has, you know, a parent. He is, after all, 16 and perfectly capable of doing everything without me… And really, I think I will need some of the Prufrock puch (with plenty of vodka) when DDTwinA and DDTwinB are applying.</p>

1974

<p>I didn’t cut my little boy’s hair until he was about 4 (shiny dark curls were too cute) and no matter how I dressed him (“Daddy’s Boy” t-shirt) or even after I told his name (think something VERY masculine), people insisted on referring to him as “her” or “she”. Maybe I should have just introduced him as Fabio.</p>

1975

<p>Oh! And one more.</p>

<p>I had a VERRRY helpful woman explain to me that my girls were obviously not identical. They must, instead, be “Paternal twins.” I think this means they have the same father, but I’m not really sure???</p>

1976

<p>Keep the twins stories coming! They are priceless!! I can’t wait to share them with the IRL family at dinner tonight!</p>

1977

<p>I’m sorry to pass this story along, but I must. Swallow whatever you’re drinking first.</p>

<p>A friend’s daughter is a singleton who follows a set of fraternal twin girls who look quite different from one another. When she was somewhere around four, her mother learned - from a teacher who could barely tell the story - that at school, some of the singleton’s friends had told her that the two sisters couldn’t be twins, because they didn’t look the same. So she had been helping to enlarge her friends’ understanding of fraternal twins this way: My sisters are twins. That DOESN’T mean they look the same. It means they were BORN at the same TIME. One came out one hole, and one came out the other.
:eek:</p>

1978

<p>Harriet - What? They don’t?</p>

1979

<p>Harriet: Thanks for the warning. Very needed, indeed.</p>

1980

<p>Oh mountains, you wag!</p>

<p>May Day is a day for general silliness. I made my Brit Lit class read “Corinna’s Gone A-Maying” and told them their assignment was to have sex, preferably with another person. I even told them extra credit would be given for a signed affadavit.</p>

<p>That’s my standard procedure for Election Day. (Poll watcher must sign.) I didn’t see why I should change my procedure.</p>