Stop this craziness. Calm down and stop making everything complicated… I do not see any reason to contact the financial aid office. You are already getting the maximum package you are going to get from them. They are giving you everything but a small contribution and a normal student loan which you would get almost anywhere.
I don’t see any reason to defer. You will be in about the same position next year. You can’t accept enrollment or get work study or take any classes anywhere if you defer. If you go to U of R at least you can start work study. I think it is better to work a year after graduating making a salary a person with a degree gets rather than a year before making a minimum salary with whatever work you can find. And college costs go up every year.
- internships/co-ops done during the school year are helpful, you get paid decently and you are gaining experience and perhaps going to get a job offer from the employer. This is okay to do this and delay your graduation by a semester for this. All your aid will be saved for the next semester. Don't worry about this now, you probably won't do one until a year or two in. Or you can do a summer one. Do not get distracted by this issue. you will understand once you get there.
- You cannot go to U of R if you enroll another university. It does not work this way. Then you will be a transfer and have to apply fresh as a transfer and you will not likely get a big aid package. This makes no sense.
- work study jobs at U of R: student union jobs http://rochester.edu/college/wcsa/commons/student-employment.html athletic dept jobs for students https://rochester.edu/athletics/studentemployment/index.html
start looking for a job for fall now
http://enrollment.rochester.edu/financial-aid/seo/
If you make $9 per hour, you will work about 11 hours a week.
- you can start at engineering and see if you like it, if you switch out that is fine. There are all kids of other jobs. I would not worry about this.
- your student loans will start repayment 6 months after graduation. They will be about $325 a month for 10 years. You can also do income based repayment if you didn't get enough pay to make the 325 at first.
- although you shouldn't worry about grad school now. Often employers give tuition assistance. Some grad schools offer aid or tuition remission and teaching or research assistance for MS, almost all do for PhD.
Now whatever your mother and sister are up to is more craziness if not fraud. If you sister needs help she should go to tutoring at school. Pell grants last for 12 semesters or 8 years. Loans can be taken for 7.500 per year until 32,000 is reached (or 52,000 for students when the parent is declined for a Plus loan.)