<p>Your initial post implies moving to get closer to the kid but a subsequent post makes it appear to be largely job-related with a side benefit of being somewhat closer to the kid (but not next to the kid).</p>
<p>If the goal of moving is to be closer to the kid then it doesn’t seem to make sense since this is likely only a temporary move on the kid’s part. If the real goal is to get to a better economic situation with the side benefit of being closer then I say go for it.</p>
<p>Realize that there might be some dismay on the part of the kid in that ‘coming home’ doesn’t really have the same meaning since there’d be no friends there, a different environment, etc. but I wouldn’t let that stop you. Some kids really don’t care, especially after the first visit or two when they realize everything’s different anyway and that they’ve moved on from the HS scene (as have their friends if they’re even there anymore). If they’re really distraught over it they can always visit their close friends in the old location.</p>
<p>I agree with MANY of the posters about not moving right away. I intitally went to school 5 hours away by car to gain some independence. Then I decided that I felt too isolated (psychologically) and I wanted to move closer to home. Around my first semester at Colgate, 2 hours away from hoem and an easy afternoon trip for the family, there were some discussions about the dad possibly getting a job offer in NYC metro area. That meant my parents and my bro (then in HS) would be very glad to pick up and move back to NJ where we origianlly came from. I felt disheartened and wondered why I had transferred in the first place (in some ways!). I wanted to be able to come home to be near my friends, in my room, and eat/shop at our local Wegmans. If they DID move, I wouldn’t have been REALLY happy even though I knew tons of peopel from the NYC metro area.</p>
<p>I just wouldn’t do it for a bit until your D can feel comfortable to the point where she doesn’t really need to come home just for the hangouts and high school friends. That may not happen until after graduation if she stays in touch with many of her HS friends. Or it can happen at the end of the year when she realizes who she’d really rather be friends with. Kids go through a lto of changes in the first year and they need a source of stability somewhere- their rooms at home.</p>
<p>Wait to relocate, 8 hours is easily driven in one day. It is important for your child to have that link to her past, freshmen year is the transition year when she still has connections to her hometown. Visit Michigan a few times, including in the middle of winter before you decide you want to live there. Consider - would you move there if D’s college were not a factor? It won’t hurt to wait another two years and rethink your plans when your D has loosened her hometown ties. By then you will be used to living without her and may relocate to another area independent of her location. We could see retiring to son’s college town, but definitely not until after he finishes his undergrad experience- if decides on grad school there, tough luck (we’ll see what happens at the time).</p>
<p>Glad to hear all of your opinion, my D is very independent, I true believe she will be happy in anywhere she lives (because we moved a couple of times from different countries, she was fine with our relocation). I also know she doesnt like us chase her where she goes, we will let it go. As everybody says, she doesnt want us to move even she goes to college, because she still wants to hangout her friends when she comes home
I agree that we should consider about our long term goals for living and working but not transit condition. Besides, we visited Michigan and can not say we like it even through we are living similar cold city. I appreciate that all of your advice ,it helps me a lot.</p>