<p>I believe in keeping things equitable, though not necessarily equal. Our three kids are spread out over 7 years, which was enough time for the cost of d1’s school, which d3 also attended, to nearly double. Fortunately, our income changed for the better during that time. I would not have told one child she could not attend the school we paid for her sister to attend unless the financial consequences were dire. </p>
<p>If a child isn’t emotionally or academically ready to go off to college, then I wouldn’t pay for it right after high school. But if a child simply doesn’t achieve at a superstar sibling’s level, I’d still pay the same amount for each education. For example, I wouldn’t tell the superstar to apply anywhere but the other to look only at instate publics because “she can get a teaching degree anywhere” (as is often said on this board, though not by me). I’d spend roughly the same amount on each child’s education – not to the penny, but roughly – as long as each child was making good progress.</p>
<p>Because we spent so much less on d1’s education, we’re going to make an adjustment at some point – either as a gift when she buys a house, in our wills, or something. She‘d never ask for or expect it, but it seems right to us.</p>