So, after thinking long about it, I'm taking Princeton off my list. LMK if my thought process is

Yes, the Princeton the OP describes doesn’t sound like the Princeton I know, either. What the OP describes sounds very much like Princeton from decades ago. Even the financial stats demonstrate that the Class of 2021 is largely made of low income to mid to upper middle income families. Approximately 60% of this class received financial aid and 22% of the class is recipients of the Federal Pell Grant. Of course, you will find those super rich kids with distinct “preppy” fashion walking around the campus debating about which eating club to join, but then Princeton isn’t the only campus you’ll find them among its peers. My son and I certainly didn’t get that feeling when we visited the campus. Most of the students seem very much like us, and we felt very comfortable being there.