<p>
Yep. I’d have made the same call. (But I’d have still taken the opportunty to coach her on her appearance at the hearing. I couldn’t have resisted. No way. I’m weak. )</p>
<p>thanks for giving us the final outcome…and all best to your son. sure were a lot of INTERESTED READERS…could have happened to so many of our kids…</p>
<p>After reading these posts it seems important for parents and students to read the schools policies and penalties as another data point when choosing a college. While you may not want a college that totally ignores illegal activities you also may not want one that is trying to string a few kids up as examples or that punishes severely after a first offense. I think your child’s school sounds like they are in the healthy middle. The response of a small fine and course seems appropraite. At many colleges you need to be caught three times before you have to leave the dorm. Also, if your child is present and not drinking–such as if they are visiting a friend’s room that has alcohol in the mini-fridge --they should write an appeal which most schools consider if their case is a good one. At my s’s college it seems the RAs get involved when its obvious such as a loud party or someone that is repeatedly flaunting it.</p>
<p>It might be a good idea for parents to prepare their kids for rules away from home. The rules are invisible until someone gets in the mood to punish someone who is breaking the rules. Might seem unfair but the truth is this happens all the time. UNFAIR and could cost you a scholarship. Usually the one who gets caught has the most to lose. Ive seen kids falling down drunk members of an elite eating club completely ignored and the same night someone gets stopped with a covered beer can.and severely punished. What a farce but in the end the institution make the rules and they get to play it the way they want. That is the speech I suggest everyone give their kids. Unfair but that is life.</p>
<p>One should also be aware that it’s sometimes the state or town that can be the problem. I have a friend whose daughter is over 21 who had lunch with a friend who was under 21. They both had wine with their meal. She was accused of providing liquor to a minor even though they both paid for their own meals and she wasn’t aware of the age of her friend.</p>
<p>Colleges are caught in the middle – if they don’t enforce alcohol laws and something happens – such as a student death – some parents are quick to sue.
I doubt the school will do much for a first-time alcohol offense. Probably will make them go to some kind of program. Highly unlikely that they would suspend him or take away scholarship.</p>
<p>Basically I agree with Crum. If the result is instructive or constructively memorable, ok. If the result can be genuinely damaging to scholarships or future prospects for an arbitrary, shifting social rule involving no actual harm, well, I might want to hear and be heard, too.</p>
<p>What a difference a generation makes. When I turned 18, my sophomore year at an elite u, ROTC had a good after school refresher the day before Thanksgiving, my first experience with alcohol, also free and unlimited. Drunks and druggies mostly wouldn’t or couldn’t survive there either.</p>