<p>SBmom, I don’t particularly care how my comments are perceived, or even if anyone likes them, or approves. I am completely polarized in my decision and it is final. Fortunately, my profession does not require that I be able to run fast, throw footballs, swim very far, jump high, etc. For me to not be able to do my work would require that I would be unable to think, speak, type, etc. So this is not the fatalistic decision that it might appear to be if taken out of context. </p>
<p>BTM that is a stunning story. What incredible courage. And you’re so right about having to commit to this fight every single day. It’s not enough to just say “I’m going to fight this”, and then go do it. It is necessary to summon the psychological energy and make the commitment every single morning, when one’s eyes first open, and the reality hits anew. And then keep making the commitment throughout the day. </p>
<p>I was thinking of the five year survivor in Texas; he presented in the emergency room with the exact same symptoms I had, but from the sounds of it he was in far worse condition. (We have the exact same diagnosis.) His wife was told more than once that it was not expected that he would live through the night. As it was related to me, she didn’t get upset or panic or get emotional - she simply responded very calmly “you don’t know my husband very well”. Then, in the hospital, if he encountered rules he did not agree with, he simply ignored them, or broke them. When his esophogus (sp?) was burned from radiation and his doctors wanted to put in a feeding tube, he refused to permit it, and instead found a way to eat, and actually managed to gain weight in the process. He also did not permit a few other procedures, determined instead to get his own body fighting on his behalf, and, as it all turned out, he was right, and his doctors were wrong, or, maybe a better way to say that, they were less accurate than was he. He also found creative ways to avoid throwing up, which I’m not going to describe here. Last, he refused PCI, even though (supposedly) it gives one a virtual free pass from relapses in the brain, a common issue with small cell lung cancer. In spite of all the evidence, he did not wish to risk the side effects. He’s been right there so far as well. </p>
<p>He continues to fight to this day. He owns a ranch, and keeps running it. He has horses, cows, whatever other animals one keeps on a ranch; he doesn’t accept shortcomings and he refuses to stop working. He either cannot or will not weld any more because of risk to his lungs, and welding was a significant percentage of his income prior to his cancer diagnosis. But he does everything else, and he refuses to quit. He is only 55 years old. </p>
<p>His second to last check up, the only thing his oncologist could find wrong was that his colesterol was too high. He was offered a prescription, which he refused, and corrected the matter with diet instead. His last visit, his numbers were far closer to normal, if not completely normal. </p>
<p>Now he is focusing on preparing himself for the next battle - fighting off secondary primary cancers, which he believes may happen, as this is reported in all the literature. He is heavily focused on developing his physical and emotional fitness; in his mind great strength will be very necessary should he need to fight very hard again.</p>
<p>Oh - I almost forgot - LAF approved my fundraiser! Now I have to go figure out how to actually do it, lol.</p>
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